I'm holding my blood tinted blade,
And I can feel my life starting to fade.
I'm on the ground in my room,
And As I lie there I hold the knife,
Feeling the pain of my horrible life.
The pain is growing,
And the knife drops out of my hands,
It bounces off the ground as it lands.
Reality is coming to me,
And I burst out crying,
As I realize I’m dyeing.
I wonder "will my family miss me?"
I started seeing memories of my family,
I knew they had lied when they said they loved me.
I make a book of memories within my mind,
As I soon stop flipping though my memory Book,
I take one last look,
About my entire time alive.
I see many faces,
And millions of places.
But then it stops,
As I take my last breath,
And I face my death,
There’s no turning back.
I close my eyes,
And whisper "good-bye".
Author notes
Depressing eh? don't worry i dont think like this. And I would never, ever do it <3
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Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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Dark yet beautiful. Bravo!
Wow. Such a very dark write.But very beautiful at the same time. I loved it. Oh boy! I cannot stop reading your poetry. They are so beautiful and it has a great deal of reality in them. Amazing work Carrie!
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wow this is an amazing poem filled with so many emotions so sad, but lovely i enjoyed reading this piece, i love the ending but in my opinion you should take out the last line and leave it with the whisper good bye, i loveeeeeee that its just a thought but amazing which ever way, great job and continue to write, its the best way to express yourself and ur great at it .....
~natasha~
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o.O wow i never thought of doing that! It makes the ending so much stronger! Thanks alot, I think I'll change it ^_^
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i don't really see where you get that this is a weak poem. i really enjoyed it. and i agree with xxbloodyxkissesxx. the last lines were amazing!
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amazing
i absolutely love this poem!! i love the last 6 lines...there awesome...
peace
*kelse*
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Hmmm, this poem seems to represent one of the other poems i have read from you but i do enjoy this poem. Again i hope you dont actualy feel this way and i think this poem is really good you have alot of potential Emo-care-bear and great jog
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I have to disagree with FaerieGeek on this one I liked it and I agree with her that you do have potentiial and this is a good write and all sucide poems are different and not all of them are the same. Great Write!
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Hmmm
I've seen several poems almost exactly like this, but putting them aside, I thought this one was okay.
You have potential. I found it a little awkward pacing wise though.
Keep writing. And use spell check
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