The fire's gone out~
when there was so much wood to burn.
Author notes
this is about a friend of mine who died much too young.
A contest entry
- Give Me A Two-Liner by PrettyRagDoll.
600 points, ended May 19, 2007, 73 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Hit Me With Your Best Shot - One Liners Only(1) by 2lullabyhaven.
745 points, ended June 12, 2007, 76 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - 2 or 3 lines ONLY ANYTHING GOES! by Florida Sunshine.
450 points, ended June 24, 2007, 113 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - One Liners (GIVE ME ALL YOU GOT!) by A Murderous Lament.
600 points, ended June 19, 2007, 74 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - no imagery(o.k. some imagery~ 2 lines max), just a poem of pure thought. any subject. prewrites are allowed. by wendymolly.
520 points, ended March 2, 32 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 19 of 19
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Your author note is in complete sync with your thought of knowing. Very real. Great in the way you were able to convey such a wosdom in so few words! Your a finalist in the contest!
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this has the feeling of home spun wisdom, nice...very well done...Best of luck to you in the judging...PK
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Awww- thats so sweet. and sad. it is such a tragedy when life is snuffed out far to soon.
Good Luck in Malicai's contest.
Claire-Anne -
This is sad.. I read it from another contest.. Great line
Inspired me to write a one-liner Lol Good luck in the contest. Great line.
A MURDEROUS LAMENT <\33 -
I am so glad you explained it in the notes... It makes it crystal clear. I totally agree with the write! I am sorry about your friend. Thanks for entering my contest!
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First of all, I'm sorry about your friend.
Second of all, this short poem was absolutely stunning. The metaphor was perfect. It was beautiful and sad and...I'm at a loss for words.
-S -
i must say that this is very profound. i would have loved to have been the one to think this up
best of luck in the contest. be well and be blessed
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Congratulations on the gold. This was beautiful yet tragic and puts me at a loss for words. so much in just two lines.
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Leaves alot to my imagination, dear brosef....
Missing you!
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This one
Shines in multi-color.
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Everything about it is so cool. "When there was so much wood to burn." is a great line! I am very sorry about your friend...I feel your pain. It's true, when they're taken away from us there is/was still so much to do or say "wood to burn." Again, I am truly sorry for your loss and great job!
Good luck in the contest!!!
~Poetrydove~ -
Wow.
This was just amazing. I don't know what else to say. The inspiration behind these two small lines make them so powerful, so heartbreaking. You have a way with words.
-BabyBear -
Awfully sad, but your metaphors of life and death are amazing; both beautiful and rich. Deepest sympathy for your loss. Luck for the contest.
DancingRed.
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I never noticed your authors notes the first time I read this. It went one hundred and eighty degrees from funny to touching. Sorry for the loss my friend.
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ahh... very good. the explanation actually increased the emotional pull of the lines themselves. though obviously on their own, they still mean so much. well done!
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thank you very much indeed.
Alex.
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for our reactions
Floorboards (feet together like other lumber pieces set in place for a home feeling?),
"Fire" is powefully showing how someone shines in our lives, as you didn't just use gasonine for comparison to one's fueled effect. I know our number of years are like lumber with usefulness implied to keep another warm even as our bright fat can be shared not just by cuddles but in its offered consumption through aerobic movement that can be done playing with each other etcetera... or the 20% imparted for brain power may very well come via the flame of the index finger pointing something out but like 1/5 of things yet to be done with the hands.
The concept of the beautiful blaze has hints of what may hurt if it gets out of the hearth. So, it reminds me of the 900's of lifespan going down to 120 by assertion in Genesis 6 for no wasting to be made of our time that's to be using energy ergonomically to know God even, so Psalm 90 sums it with current age averages even to be budgeters of our existence as to the worth of good and bad if we can evaluate our little interval with one in order it gets us to another by acceptance of right choices.
But he is merciful, as can be read and known with a because that isn't a broken record. I think of my brother who collapsed fatally at 31, during which lifetime he wished for a glorious day. Resurrection is that second period God'd like to reignite in the earth when it has been cleansed of what isn't timeless activity... after searches have been stopped or crossed. Job 14:13-15, John 5:28,29 and Acts 24:15 are examples of soothing consistency I could yet hope for with my dad who understably in the light of dropped longevities also had glowing goals at 72 when his life ended. Of course, with cancer, he couldn't see the chance so enthusiastically after the first half of the last season but taking a walk was still on his mind. But with scripture there is cure that will raise more than odds as Isaiah 33:24 doesn't just hint from a book of other prophecy proven. This I need to know still is excellent enough to put on my list or what I should look into.
I was obviously affected by your write, I hope I didn't overscribble,
Carolyn
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You have said everything in so few lines. ' the fire's gone out when there was so much wood to burn'. A brilliant comparisson that I will probably use myself..Each time thinking of the poet who created it. Well done my friend.
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Sounds like a fat lazy old couple. Hehehe
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