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*What Goes on in Here~Stays in Here*

(They did WHAT???)
 
No place of honor do we claim
No beauty attached to our name
Many come, but it's not us they see
Only if they have to pee

No family portraits adorn our walls
We're just "that" room off the hall
But, Oh my gosh!!  The things we see
When the folks have got to pee

There's nosey Gladys who ventures in
does her "thing" and then
Opens every cabinet door
and peeks into every drawer

Teenage Betty shows up next
just before her boyfriend Dex
Takes a wad of toilet paper
Inserts in places that really shape her

Little Billy always late
and boy he makes some big mistakes
Can't quite make it to the pot
Uses mom's best towels to clean the spot

Here comes Mom once again
quietly sneaking in
Locks the door, open windows
Lights her cig and out she blows

Spray some Lysol in the air
Convinced that no one is aware
Wash with soap and brush her teeth
Yuck! My towels sure do reek!

Author notes

In case this is anonymous, please don't mention my name.  I will respond via IM's Thank you!!!!! 

 

In a list

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 14 of 14

  • Janice M Pickett
    February 28, 2008
    Edit | Reply

    LOL 1000 times

    As usual you are a winner at funny writing and pretty damn good at all other forms as well. LOL Well done telling these little truths so many hide. Excellent entry.
    Darn always read you twice and find it just as funny or more the second time.
    I want your funny poems for the latest book PLEASE they rock!


  • Janice M Pickett
    August 13, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Oh this is so good. Walls can talk ya know. One I have heard of even wails all the time. Silly cry baby.

    Well done girl friend. Great Poem.


  • sunny day
    April 4, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Vickie, I see the contest is over so I did use your name here. The walls are ROFL at this one. This is absolutely great and I am laughing so hard my side is hurting. Your sense of humor is fantastic and your wit is so quick. I loved the rhythm and rhyme as this flowed off the page effortlessly and the picture you put with this is soooooooo cute. Thank you for sharing of yourself the way you do and never lose that sense of humor. I just checked your page so I could get a look at the newest grandaughter. She is adorable. It didn't take you long to get her on there. How many hours old was she when you posted that one? LOL This was really super and gave me such a laugh. Thank you again. Love you my friend, Joyce

  • Bob Fox
    March 30, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Lol

    This is different. But something no one can deny. brought ao this face. Nice , very nice. smile .& ty for your kind comment on my poem


  • Samplette gold member
    February 17, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Hilarious

    This was great. Love the picture, the write and all of it. The imagery was fantastic. SO very very funny. You did great with this. You are great with humor for sure.
    Sam


  • Arsenic-
    January 29, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    ROTFL

    That was great. i'm glad you maintain a certain amount of inspiriation from those common things around us. I get stuck in deep depressing writing too often....loved this one!


  • Ashley Mosely
    January 29, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    LOL

    that's awesome,..i could never think of something like this..very clever..i could picture each person individually doing their thing


  • Melodies
    January 28, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Isn't this the FUNNEST place?

    LOL... the bathroom is just the kickiest place in the house! It isn't even counted as a room, according to real estate people. Well, then, think how you would like a house without a bathroom? HECK! Your poem is darling and all around FUNNY!


  • lovelustre
    January 27, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    So funny!


  • Theater Of Dreams
    January 27, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    HILARIOUS

    YOU crack me up!!!! This is priceless...and I find myself looking paranoid in my bathroom!!! 'The sink has eyes.' Needs to be a movie from this poem. Sit on the toity and get flushed...

    GREAT JOB!!!!


  • CountryCousin
    January 27, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    Oh my.

    I have got to show this to my minister's wife because in church you never know who does what. But if the walls could talk I would image they would say this. This is a highly imaginative poem that tickles the funny bone.


  • pentopaper
    January 27, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Hey there stranger!!!! I am so glad to see you are still here and still gracing AP with your talented pen!! This made me truly laugh out loud! It flowed so smoothly I was wanting more, more!!!! Your fantastic sense of humor is such a wonderful attribute, being able to share it with such style is a true blessing. BRAVO!! ~Karen~


  • Sherry gold member
    January 27, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    LOL cute poem this was funny.I liked the part about the kid not making it and on the floor. I bet your so glad you dont have to potty train anymore. Few more years that grandaughter will be learning.


  • Soulful Woman silver member
    January 27, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    This was great...This is something that we all do...Aren't we terrible.?? lol
    I loved this..
    Soulful Woman

1 - 14 of 14