Look but never listen,
Interpret this as inhibition
What is left for you to gain?
Rampant childish temper,
Difficult to remember.
The fever that left me bruised
With your enduring celerity
Debilitating my wishful thinking.
How should I begin to absolve
The chemistry of your mistakes?
With what can I replace
This great anomaly?
Slow hand motions signaling
Realignment of the soul
Premonition of release.
Deviating from the narrow
Contemplating origins for
Dissolution of integrity.
Interchanging intensity with
Illustrations of impatience.
I am but a half soul
An elucidation of savagery
A creation of disassociation
That likes to play God
Once in a little while.
A contest entry
- Give me your best poem. by keanes.
600 points, ended May 1, 2007, 19 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - show me again by slipperssun.
800 points, ended October 26, 2007, 25 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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Wow, this is brilliantly written, with lots of interesting words that made me smile. Well done, and congratulations on the well-deserved gold.
Blessed be
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where is my dictionary when i need it... i am coming back to this one to read again... seems very powerful. thank you for the entry into my contest and i wish you well
cheers
Jen
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Great poem with good use of alliteration
Congrats on the gold.
Thanks for your comment
Pozo
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Hmm...
Your subtle rhyme scheme, and obvious width of vocabulary make this piece unignoarably deep, this piece was like a glass of fine merlot, stimulatiing every sense, down to the last drop, or word in this case. Youi've done an exquisite job passing your message to the reader, that is, if the reader has as broad a vocabulary, or experience with google. >_^
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i think we all like to play god here and there, never easy though, that section reminds me of a poem i have which i may repost later today. i like the alliteration here too in the fourth verse especially. a good poem, great use of language.
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This is absolutely amazing...
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Very well observed
I know I never comment on your stuff but I thought I would just say hi and tell you this is one amazing peice. As always the depth is definitely there.
"I am but a half soul
An elucidation of savagery
A creation of disassociation
That likes to play God
Once in a little while."
Wow...thats al lI can say
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