it was a dark winters night
moon was shining very bright
cold, crisp snow lay all around
glistening on the winters ground
stars were twinkling in the sky
as I heard the owl's cry
and the moonlight on the snow
shimmered with a special glow
then there was a little crunch
a little sound, a little munch
looking past that evergreen
now a spot of brown is seen
a delicate leg stepped out
big brown eyes began to scout
peeking ‘round that group of trees
that deer brought me to my knees
there he stood so very proud
as my watching he allowed
he seemed to want me to see
what beauty was meant to be
for on that one moonlit night
Mother nature did invite
understanding to come through
we are the same, me and you
two of God's many creatures
now with you as my teacher
I will bow a humble man
and take my place in God's plan
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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wonderful poem. I am good at rhyming but I struggle making the poem to flow like a river. "Shout To The Lord," Christian song rhyme and it flows nicely.
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I also struggle to get the rythm right too, in fact just read some of my comments, the readers do notice, lol. thank you for the wonderful comment. hugggssssss!!!!!!!!
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I think this is great how you used nature the way it's supposed to be used to turn us to God, cause I sorta read the title and got turned off and then I read your poem and was pleasently surprised~keep it up!
-deep one -
wonderfully beautiful
What a beautiful poem. The beauty of your words captured the beauty of the picture. Wonderful! Just awesome!
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I am really glad that you enjoyed this poem. hugggsss!!!!!
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BEAUTIFUL
This is so good I felt like I was there with you and you are so true we are the same in so many ways yet we should be the ones looking out for them.You have done nature a great honor by bringing out her beauty and our place in this web of life.Thank you so much for sharing this master piece with those of us who still love nature...
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Thank you so much for the wonderful comment. I believe there is great majesty in many of Gods creatures. thank you again, huggggsssss!!!!
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Wonderful
This has such a spiritual essense running through it, it just captured me with a smooth rhythm and rhyme and kept me captivated in it's beauty. The words just painted such a wonderful imagery. You are a talent Missy, enjoyed this very much! Always a pleasure to read your work
~Tia
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thank you so much for the comment. I am really glad it touched you, for isn't that what we all hope for, to touch the reader? Your comments are always so sweet. hugggsss!!!!!!
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Very nice and calming poem, nice discription of the feelings nature can bring when we watch it and realizing that we are all Gods creation.
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thank you for the terrific comment, I am glad you enjoyed it. huggssss!!!!
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Very Good
This is beautifull
Like the feel of the verse
like this
two of God's many creatures
now with you as my teacher
I will bow a humble man
and take my place in God's plan
rick
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thank you very much for the wonderful comment, I am really glad you enjoyed it. thank you, hugggssss!!!!!
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First let me say that the art work is beautiful. We have deer that visit in groves because the woods is literally our backyard. LOL They feast on acorns from the trees. They seem to be very use to us now and seldom run away when we come into the yard. I think they instinctively know we will not harm them.
The Poem: I know this feeling! The commune between nature and man. Because we were all created by the Master with the same zeal, the same fervor, there is an understanding when we meet creature to creature, face to face. I loved this! I love my deer. You notice, I call them; "my deer". LOL I cannot for the life of me understand why we hunt them and then feast on them. Too much for me to fathom, but that is the subject for yet another writ. This one is beautiful!
Much Love ♥
Renee
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I agree with you. My family does not hunt, I could never do it. I think these animals are so beautiful. Though I am not saying anything against anyone who does. Thank you for the wonderful comment, I really appreciate it. hugggssss!!!!!
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wonderful story. the rhythm and rhyme are great. your use of imagery is superb. i especially liked this part:
there he stood so very proud
as my watching he allowed
he seemed to want me to see
what beauty was meant to be
because something very similar happened to me once. remind me to tell you about it sometime. you did a fabulous job with this. keep writing. God bless you
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I will remind you to tell me, because now you have my curiosity going. Thank you very much for your wonderful comment, I really appreciate it. hugggsss!!!!!
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Exqusite piece of poetry. This is what it is all about. Beautiful imagery and the sounds created by your cleaver words was fabulous. Very inspirational. Mother nature at her best, makes you stop and wonder. Some people call killing a dear a sport, it is more like a crime. They are so majestic I think. I loved the photo as well. It is very vivid.
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thank you very much for the terrific comment. I am so glad that you enjoyed this. hugggsss!!!!!!
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Beautifully worded, unveils the feeling the majesty of nature always accompanies. Well done.
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Thank you for the wonderful comment, I really appreciate it. hugggsssss!!!!!!!!!
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i want you to know I got chills reading this, so majestic and flowing...peaceful and full of understanding. I love reading your poetry. it flows right off the page and into my heart. Please write some more soon, tell your muse vacation is over...lol. A good poem here with heart and soul in it.
Becky
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Actually these last two poems were ones I had started before but could not finish and had put aside. Well, I went into storage, scurried around and pulled these out. My muse is definately on a roll, lol. thank you for the wonderful comment. huggggsssss!!!!!!
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z You are always most welcome gracious lady, my poet sister. And I am truely glad your muse is out and ready to roll her sleeves up...
Becky
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Excellent!
I am always amazed when someone can pull off a rhyming poem without it being affectatious. I think you've done it! A lovely scene, well described as well as the quickening of emotions with your words. My favorite stanza because it's unique:
then there was a little crunch
a little sound, a little munch
looking past that evergreen
now a spot of brown is seen -
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Thank you for the wonderful comment. I am so glad that you liked this. thank you again. hugggsss!!!!
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WOW! I mean WOW!
This is spectacular! I loved it. I am sure I have not seen any poetry on AP written about deer, except for some Christmas poems that included Raindeer.
This is very beautiful. It rhyme and flow and the lines were very nicely balanced. I loved it! I am still applaud free but I'll applaud this, coz this is a must-applaud poem! lol
Just a thingy, in "winters" and "Gods" there should be an apostrophe ' --> "winter's" .. "God's"
Other than that, excellent job!
Keep on writing,
Nooni
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Thank you for the wonderful comment and applause, I really appreciate it. I did write a poem involving a deer before called "the meadow", in fact almost did not write this because of that one. Though this one lead me down a different path. Thank you for telling me about the apostrophe's. thanks again, hugggsss!!!!!
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WOW! I mean WOW!
This is spectacular! I loved it. I am sure I have not seen any poetry on AP written about deer, except for some Christmas poems that included Raindeer.
This is very beautiful. It rhyme and flow and the lines were very nicely balanced. I loved it! I am still applaud free but I'll applaud this, coz this is a must-applaud poem! lol
Just a thingy, in "winters" and "Gods" there should be an apostrophe ' --> "winter's" .. "God's"
Other than that, excellent job!
Keep on writing,
Nooni
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