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I still do

My heart beat fast as I walked down the hall
Tears streamed down my face like a waterfall
All is lost I am done
Sorrow over comes me
I wish it were me in your arms
If only it were me you were kissing
My heart yearns for your touch
You love that bitch almost as much as I love you
Can't you see I need you to stroke my hair
Press my head against your chest
Say the words I've been longing to hear
Press your lips against mine
Instead I'm lying on the floor my heart shattered
The only sound is blood and tears dripping to the tile
She doesn't even love you like I do
She doesn't notice that you never seem to be nervous
That your smile lights up the whole room
Or that your eyes flash green when your happy
Light blue when your calm, dark blue when your worried
And brown when your angry and darker the angrier you are
Only I know these things
Your words still sting me like a bee
A waterfall of dreams and hopes drained by your love for her
it kills me to hear you tell her how you feel
My passion for you still burns despite my broken heart
It was me who brought you up when you were down
Who stayed by you during your toughest times
Who defended you when they said such horrible things
Who spent the night in a bathroom the first time you got drunk
Who rushed to the hospital in my pajamas when your mom died protecting you
Who helped you when no one else would
Now I lay here impossibly broken alone and bitter
Wishing for you envying her
Dam this horrible pain you have brought
Yet I still love you so
In spite of the tears, shattered dreams, hurt, pain
I still do

Author notes

"I love you even though you love her" that's my quote for the contest.Love sucks. Especially if your me.
option 5

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 12 of 12

  • xxRainbowDawnxx
    June 16, 2008
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    awww this one makes me feel so sad too... I truly can relate to all you have described.


  • ItalianRebelRoOcker
    April 21, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This is a very sad and touching poem.I loved it.thank u so much for enetering.This poem kind of reminds me of my own life too.


  • Naridill gold member
    January 28, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    'Only I know these things
    Your words still sting me like a bee
    A waterfall of dreams and hopes drained by your love for her'

    Emotional and fluent - your words really sting nicely and create a stark feel to this sad piece.

    Thanks for entering,


  • leander Moderators member
    April 28, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    There is a whole lot of emotion and feeling streaming from the syllables of your words here. You definately managed to display them very clearly Unfortunately, all of us know these feelings just all too well... but they will go over - and that's the good side of it
    Apart from some spelling oopsies, you've done a great job


  • Amunet Wolfbane Moderators member
    April 26, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Alot of emotion in this piece, which is good. There are a few spelling errors and I am not keen on the profanity at all. I don't feel it adds to your work as a poet or make the poem any more effective. Plus being in a 13 and under contest, is really not appropriate. But overall it is a good rant of emotion


    • kim5519
      April 27, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      I don't know what profanity is but if you want me put another entry instead i will.


  • Anonymousgirl
    April 24, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Nice

    I reallllly liked this one. That is EXACTLY how I feel right now about my ex. It stinks! Very emotional. Very nice.


  • kissjess
    April 5, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Wow. Just. Wow.

    My verdict says it all. This is so amazing! It's so clever. I'm just... Wow! I'm speechless (and you've known me almost two years, and there aren't a lot of times when I'm speechless)! How did you...? You are so amazing! Okay, so first of all, There is all this emotion, and this great angst, and you can just FEEL it, you know? it's like, your eyes are simply reading it, but you can feel it tingle in your mind, and it just is something you can't control! it's like, it's intense-and then it's over, and you don't know it. wow. just wow.


  • Maybe Anastasia
    January 28, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Ok this is a very nice write. It is full of emotions and you did a very nice job "contridicting" the feeling. I think you have a few extra words in there though. I'd take out the for and the to you in the lines,
    You love that bitch almost as much as I do to you
    Can't you see I need for you to stroke my hair. Good write and thanks for entering. (:


  • CalmBeforeTheStorm
    January 21, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I love your emotions in this. They definently sound familiar. I really enjoyed reading it. Thank you for entering my contest and good luck!

    ~Kristen...AKA...Longing to be Loved~


  • gigbob18
    January 21, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    good job


    • kim5519
      February 15, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      You probably didn't even read it. LOL! It's okay but you shouldn't really say anything if you didn't read it.

1 - 12 of 12