Guilt Trip

I look in you eyes, and I realise that you are what I have been waiting for all of these times.
But then I look closer and see, our story isn’t that perfect when read  between the lines.
What I feel for you is so real even death can’t affect it.
But at the same time so wrong, that my conscience rejects it.
We are happy, but at the expense of another.
I am in love with you, but not necessary your lover.
You make all my troubles fade away into the past.
But blind me from seeing my heartbreak, for we cannot last.
I bough a one way ticked down guilt trip lane.
I can never look at her how I used to, it won’t ever be the same.
I  feel like my life has turned into one contradiction.
Being hate to be cheating on, but unable to stop, like an addiction.
I can’t make you see, what blinds you.
But by doing this I see what defines you.
If I carry this on and let you break her heart,
Will I get the karma and soon play her part?
I don’t want to walk away, but my conscience is dragging me to go.
I don’t want to leave you, but I’m helping you more than you know.
I hate being the one, that has to be erased from you call display,
I hate to be the one that makes her cry herself to sleep every day.
I bet she knows you’re being unfaithful, but is unable to leave you.
I feel what she is going through, I feel the same way too.
I Can’t carry this on, its just not right.
I guess we have to say goodbye, tonight is our last night.

I found this letter by his bedside.
I couldn’t understand, I couldn’t be strong enough not to cry.
A blind fool, that’s all I had been, a pawn to move, he couldn’t care less.
In his sick twisted game of love fool’s chess.
Revenge is the sweetest, but not always correct.
But was needed for here, in every aspect.
A simple crime scene setting, to make it look like he was the reason I was dead.
Got him locked up and screw over in his head.
But in reality I took all my things and went far far away.
And he never found this letter and thinks I am dead, to this very day.