The bitter cold of night grasps me
I search for someone to hold,
Someone to adore and give security.
The darkness closes in all around
I spin and fall into a bed of black roses.
I hear a soft call; will I be found?
I can hear the footsteps in the night.
Out into the gloom I begin to peer,
Out of my tomb into the dim light.
Dawn breaks the dread of night
And I see her, my breath she takes.
She is not a blur, but clear in the light.
Author notes
This poem has an odd rhyming scheme, notice?
A contest entry
- Enter the very first poem you posted by whispernthedark.
435 points, ended March 26, 2008, 50 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - ALMOST ANYTHING GOES by VerminVomit.
303 points, ended May 5, 2008, 47 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Notice the odd rhyming scheme?
Comments
1 - 11 of 11
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awesome
i dont really care about the rhyme scheme...but i really like the poem...
it...its hard to explain...but its really easy to imagine...
the last line is really cool..like..yeah
the whole poem...like...it made me read more, i wanted to read more...im not usually like that... -
This is great, and I like the rhyming scheme. Thank you for entering the contest, good luck.
♥
whisper
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yeah you should totally add more to this poem! You are really leaving me hanging on here! This is a really good write. Thanks for the entry and good luck!
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Thank you for your comment and I will consider adding more, though sometimes I find it hard to do that...
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Hey! I realy enjoyed reading this poem it was very creative and original as well..I als very much liked the odd rhyming scheme as you put it..the flow was smooth and your words were strong and powerful as well..
XTashaX -
Intriguing rhyme scheme. It seems to work well in conveying the emotion and reflection of your thoughts. Thanks for your entry!
~Lori -
nice job. like the odd rhyming scheme. i can really tell you felt lost, as we all have, especially us that have depression. it's excellent and i can relate to it very well.
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love it
i love this poem sooo much! It just reminds me so much of myself and the things I've or just the way society had judge me and then I found somone too who just didn't give a damn what other people thought and she's made me the happiest person in the world and I really like hopw this poem starts off a little dark and then unwinds into hope and a secret explosion of love. i also thought that the title was great too
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Wow, that is really good, I really enjoyed this! It has so much emotion and wonderful imagery. Thank you SO much for your wonderful entry and good luck in my contest!
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Thanks, I appreciate the comment and your welcome SO much for my entry, and thanks again! I try, I try.
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Welcome to Allpoetry!
I simply adore this! The infusion of emotion and personification here is superb. This is something that many will read and say, "Yeah! I know exactly how this feels." Great job! I am so glad you have chosen Allpoetry as the place to share your talent. I encourage you to wander around and become familiar with all the wonderful features we have here. There are also many writing groups and contests and even online classes that you can become a part of here at Allpoetry so welcome aboard and if you have any questions, don’t hesitate to contact any greeter online!
♥ Touchof1der
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