As I reflect upon the times I remember her best.
I recall that it seemed she was continuosly enduring a test.
Weather it was a life changing moment of a loved one or friend, who had chosen the road with the most bends.
She stood strong by her children, family and friends
through the hardest of times and with all her compassion, guidance and care she encouraged them to pick themselves up and find thier own way.
With the heart that only a mother could have and a mind of a friend,
she gave to so many so that they may have.
She was always there when I needed her most. To lift my spirits and to highten my hopes.
She may have left us to quickly but she is not really gone, for she lives in us all and her beauty lives on.
The love, wisdom and humor she showed us everyday, is in all of us and displayed so many ways.
She will live on through her children, and thier children as well, who will tell of this very special one of a kind person with a heart made of gold.
Who left us with such beautiful memories to treasure and hold?
You knew her as Ilona or maybe the neighbor next door
To me it was an honor and a blessing for she was my mother, my confidant, my very best friend.
A contest entry
- My Beloved Mother by okadadokie.
500 points, ended March 5, 2007, 17 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 27 of 27
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What a sweet touching poem.
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Lovely sweet poem. My mom and I are close, too.
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Lovely write for your Mom. You do know she is smiling down from Heaven about this beautiful loving write...
Lady Dragonwyck
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Well written. My best friend is my husband and my friends, Jane and Susan. But I am very close to my mom, too.
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This poem is great but it looks like a big tree in a good way.
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Special
A beautiful tribute & I think she smiles down on you, her daughter of love
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It was good that your mother was your bestfriend as well as a mom. I'm sure you two had great moments together. Thank you. Good luck.
~Oka
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Beautifully done and with such heartfelt emotions. Great job.
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Great poem really enjoy it!!
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Lovely sentiments expressed so well in these lines - easy to read and understand how you feel about your mom and all the things she did for her children. Most Moms love unconditionally and their children often do not appreciate what they have done until they have children of their own.
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"She will live on through her children, and thier children as well" >> misspelled "their". Otherwise, well penned recollection of ur mom and inspiring.
Hope 2 read more. -theQueen"
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It’s well written and a wonderful tribute to your Mother The way the flow of the poem went with your emotions was awesome. I liked the way you’ve described the attributes of your mum and how much she meant to you… My mum passed away while I was very young but I still miss her… Your mother must be proud of you and smiling at you from above… I can assure you she will always be with you in your heart…
mina
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So beautiful and well said. Mothers are amazing people, it took me growing up to truly understand the true depth of my mother, her struggles never ending, her giving heart and love of her family. Always suffering quitly in her own pain, showing it to none. For she cried alone in the dark and always held a smile for us, even in the worst of times.
A lovely trubite to a woman so brave and loving through it all.
Outstanding words of love and understanding for her!
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My mother is my best friend. To me she is the most wonderful person I've ever known, as a mother and as a friend.
I think you've paid a really beautiful tribute to your mother... your love shows through each line.
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You have woven this with sweetness. Who don’t know the meaning of mother and her true love?! I think she is just a jewel gifted from above. That is why the heaven is beneath mothers’ feet. This is just so sweet in one word and I am so glad your mother had such positive influence on you.
Thank you for sharing your poetic piece here with us :-)
~Massy~
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touching
I feel as if you were writing about my mother. We had the same close relationship you and your mother had. They are true angels in our lives. As someone just reminded me, we will meet once more who knows when.
Warm Regards...vivela -
Aww, I feel this way about my own mother too. I should go write a poem about her too!
Awesome job! This is amazing. Your flow was good. I don't like how it's choppy but it works fine. Keep up the good work!
mech
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A heartfelt tribute to your dear mother and I am sure she is smiling down at you with these words of love and tenderness. Love and light to you.
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As I reflect up the time that I remember her best,
I recall that it seemed as though she was continuously enduring a test.
Whether it was a life changing moment, for a loved one or friend, who had chosen the road with the most curving bends.
She stood strong by her children; her family, her friends.
Through the hardest of times and with all her compassion, guidance, and care she encouraged them to pick themselves up and find their own way. (I would suggest shortening this line, it disrupts the flow.)
With the heart of a mother and the mind of a friend,
She gave to so many, so that they too might have.
She always was there when I needed her most. To lift up my spirits and raise up my hopes.
She may have left us too quickly, but she's not really gone. For she lives in us all, and her memory carries on. (I changed this line because "she lives in us all and her beauty lives on" is kind of redundant when you use the same word.)
She'll live on through her children, and their children as well. The beautiful ghost with a heart of solid gold. (Make it seem more symbolic, maybe?)
Who left us with such beautiful memories to treasure and hold?
You may have known her has Ilona, or the sweet lady next door.
To me it was an honor, a blessing. For she was my mother, my confidant, my very best friend.
I hope this helps! -
wonderful sentiment, a beautiful poem. the writing itself however is un rythmical, and there are brief gasps of ryhme scheme. im sorry you lost your mother. I don't personal know how bad that is, but i can imagine. but pick yourself up by your bootstraps and eep going. im sure thats what your mother would have wanted
Good Write and God Bless
Pastoral Poet
Ben B. -
Very touching.
I'm sorry for your loss.
This poem strikes a deep chord in me, because like many other people, I too am extremely close with my mother. I can't imagine life without her.
In regards to a proper critique for your poem. There are some words that need a spell-check run. And I think that with a little tweaking on the punctuation the flow could improve.
If you want me to show you what I mean just let me know. -
This is a very touching write.. lovely words from the heart, as poetry should be. I very much like the meaning/feeling you put into you words. I think this would flow much better if you would break up the lines some. I could make a few suggestions if you are interested, just let me know. Thank you for hsaring your words. I hope you will continue writing.
welcome to the site
~Kristy
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Dear LionessK
Thankyou for reading my poem.. still finding my way around here so please forgive my ignorance not real good with the computer lol.. would love any advice you would give and again thanks for the write.. Semperfimom39 -
dear lionessk
Dear LionessK .. thankyou for responding.. would love any input you would like to add could use all the help I can get.. have some others I will be adding soon please keep iin touch and again thankyou for your insight!!
Sincerely,
Semperfimom39 -
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here is one way you could break up the lines... and try posting to the left instead of centered...
As I reflect upon the times I remember her best.
I recall that it seemed she was continuosly enduring a test.
Weather it was a life changing moment of a loved one or friend,
who had chosen the road with the most bends.
She stood strong by her children, family and friends
through the hardest of times and with all her compassion,
guidance and care she encouraged them
to pick themselves up and find thier own way.
With the heart that only a mother could have and a mind of a friend,
she gave to so many so that they may have.
She was always there when I needed her most.
To lift my spirits and to highten my hopes.
She may have left us to quickly but she is not really gone,
for she lives in us all and her beauty lives on.
The love, wisdom and humor she showed us everyday,
is in all of us and displayed so many ways.
She will live on through her children, and thier children as well,
who will tell of this very special one of a kind person with a heart made of gold.
Who left us with such beautiful memories to treasure and hold?
You knew her as Ilona or maybe the neighbor next door
To me it was an honor and a blessing for she was my mother,
my confidant, my very best friend.
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Welcome to Allpoetry!
I tend to feel the same way toward my own mother so this brought a few tears to me eyes as I hold the hope within my own heart that my own daughter will also feel the same way towards me. Thanks for the journey in time and memories! And while I am here, let me also say, welcome to Allpoetry. I hope you find us to be a helpful and friendly place for posting your future works. I strongly encourage you to take some time to wander the site and check out all that we have to offer here. If you have any questions, please feel free to contact any greeter here.
♥ Touchof1der
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Dear Touchof1der
Dear Touchof1der,
Thankyou for your warm welcome and yes I welcome all the insight and replies I can get .. would love to continue writng.. as my step-mom who passed a few years ago told me not everything has to rhyme just has to come from the heart. any help would be more than welcome.
Sincerely,
Semperfimom39
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