Voices screaming in my head.
Fear rising with every breath.
Do "they" see? Do "they" know?
Can "they" see what confusion bestows.
I know "they" know.
My voices tell me so.
But it's not real; or is it?
I hear these voices even in my dreams.
Real from unreal, I cannot tell,
when confusion reigns supreme.
"Take your meds," the Doctors say.
"You do this, all will go away."
I try, I really do. To keep the voices at bay.
But - how can I when confusion fills my day.
I want a life, I want to work.
I don't like feeling I have no worth.
A family I want, wife and kids.
But - how can I when confusion forbids.
Don't tell me to get over it,
away "it" will not go.
Delusions are my bane in life,
my mind a foggy hole.
Hard I strive, the hill to climb.
Success almost in sight.
My mind is clear! I see the light!
Then slam the door shuts tight.
Confusions roller-coaster ride has won another fight.
© joyce Ingebritson
Author notes
I lost my husband to schizophrenia. My youngest son was diagnosed with the same illness in 2000.
My heart breaks to see the battle they both are fighting every day.
I am so proud of how well my son does most days. This poem is about the things I see him battling with almost daily.
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I just had a conversation with my other son about Justin, he thinks it is a matter of just using mind over matter and "getting over it" this seems to be the theme with mental illness and they are descriminated against due to lack of understanding from todays society.
In a list
A contest entry
- Needing Help by MercurialMist.
390 points, ended July 13, 2007, 12 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Mental Afflictions by SummerlandRayne.
466 points, ended September 1, 2007, 24 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - anyone who has a mental disease. (schizophrenia, bi-polar-depression) anything by Desired-Lucidity.
600 points, ended November 6, 2007, 13 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 18 of 18
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i can relate
my 21 year old son was diagnosed with scizophrenia a year ago. He is currently in the hospital as he has had a relapse....it is so hard as his mother to watch him go through this. -
A very real poem voicing real concerns about a disabling illness. Congrats on the bronze!
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this is very true and scary at the same time
I give you all the appluase in the world for having the courage to write this so well and true, especially when this effects you daily.
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I understand how this feels...as a fellow sufferer of this disease, I only know how it feels to me...I can only speculate what my family must feel. I have a group called Schizophrenics Unite...support for those of us with the disease here on AP...you or your son may like to join...best of luck and blessed be
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This is a very touching write. My brother-in-law has suffered this now for many years. I am sorry for your loss and I wish you and your son all the best! Thanks for your entry and best of luck to you!
Love~
Az
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A beautiful write ... good luck in the contest
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I'm sorry for your husband and son. I wish them well. The only thing I have to critique on your poem is the fact that in order to rhyme, you sometimes gave up the order that would have made more sense. I do, however, love the lines "Delusions are my bane in life,//my mind a foggy hole." The imagery is well portrayed here. Good luck in my contest.
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Ring True-Wonderful Poem!
I have schizoaffective disorder-half schizophrenic/half bipolar...I'm 30yrs old, I was dx 5yrs ago. When I was 15yrs, I was dx as bipolar. I have sevaral dx's, but I feel I need not list them all. I can totally understand this poem, you have done such a wonderful job writing about what a person who has "friends" as my sister calls the voices I hear, has to deal with. No matter if we take our meds as prescribed, for some of us(including me), the voices do not entirely go away. It is so annoying to try to watch TV, and have the voices come and start chattering. Or try to read a book, and there they are again, and won't shut up. There's no way to silence them, no peace. Once again, wonderful job on this poem. Good luck in the contest.-Monica
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well written
its so sad and so full
its heartbreaking and a very good poem
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sad
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Oh my gosh, heart wrenching poem. The story behind the poem is heart breaking. You deffinetly moved me. Congratulations, I'm a hard to move rock. I loved this, everything about it. My heart goes out to you and yours. Keep writing from within.
See you around the deep end
moment liver -
Wow!
Amazing write, heartwrenching, vivid and powerful! This must of been so hard to write! Thankyou so much for sharing it. It is so educational and eye-opening!
My heart goes out to you and your family! God Bless,
Annette
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Beautifully done. This piece is strong and really gives the reader insight into the disease and how it affects life. Their own and those around them. Wonderfully penned. Thanks for entering!
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I'm so sorry about your husband and son...
You really but your emotions in this peice....
Good job
And good luck in the contest
Thanks for entering!!!
E~R~I~N -
It's tragic, yes. I'm sorry about your husband and son. My only constructive criticism is that perhaps you shouldn't limit yourself to rhyming. I think that you limited yourself a bit in there. Good luck in the contest and thanks for entering.
Lea -
I am sorry to hear about your husband and son. I do like the poem though.
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Great poem! Im sorry about your husband and son but every battle is different and sometimes can be won!
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This is the perfect description, sis. It describes all that I've seen and heard from him. It is hard to read knowing that this is what his life is really like.
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