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first

Your first love here
and now its gone
do not fret
you must move on

many will come
and some will go
cherish the ones you have
and let them know

do not let them leave
without the thought
of what you should have said
let them say they forgot

because in the end
you will know
many will come
and some will go

the only way to show true
in this life
is moving on
through trouble and strife

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

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    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
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Comments

1 - 9 of 9

  • Rosemary Stroebel silver member
    January 28, 2007

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    Thanks for entering

    The concept of the poem is good and the truth is that we do need to express our love as we feel it for many will cross our paths in our life time.

    The poem has a good flow to it but the rhythm feels a little off in some places but not so much so that it completely disturbs the read.

    Let the ink flow and your fingers dance

    Rosemary


  • Abscessed
    January 25, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    A warm welcome to All Poetry!

    Your realizations in this work are strong - and I think thats the goodness of this poem A good approach to the poem subject!
    Thank you for entering the contest
    I wish you luck and welcome you to All Poetry!

    abscessed


  • Miss Faerie Greeters member
    January 18, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    Welcome to Allpoetry

    I like this. It is wise. It is so true that many will come and go in the span of your life, you'll think you love them all lol. I did. It's only now I know that caring deeply for someone just isn't the same.
    Welcome to our site
    Faerie


  • SurelyWritten
    January 13, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Very true, something I think many people should realize, so many people have trouble moving on, but if they were able to move on, their lives would get so much better. Lost love is always hard to deal with, but you seem to have a good head on your shoulders.

    Welcome to AllPoetry, I hope you will enjoy the site as much as I have grown to! If you ever have a poem that is starving for some comments, please send me the link and I would be so glad to stop back by and comment it for you!

    Also, good luck in the 'New Members' contest!

    -shirley-


  • FifthDove
    January 11, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    Thanks for the entry and welcome to the site!

    You are right; the best way is to just move on. Nicely put, I enjoyed the read. Thank you very much for taking the time to write for and enter our contest. Best wishes and welcome to Allpoetry Dove


  • greyhaime
    January 11, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    thanks!

    thanks for entering this in the contest...
    and it is so true, many will come and some will go.. I liked it although you may want to consider changing the cuz to because, and you should add take the you'e and make it a your... but over all I liked it good luck to you and welcome to the site!!!
    Krystal


  • JLynn-4God
    January 10, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Great

    You did a great job on this write, I love the style you chose and the rhyme scheme. Hope to read more from you,
    God Bless!
    -Jenna xXx


  • Violet Moodswing Greeters member
    January 9, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    Welcome to AllPoetry

    First, in your first line, did you intend hear or here. It seems that here would work better, but I may be missing something. I like the simplicity of the poem and it flows along nicely making a very clear point.

    I enjoyed the read. Keep writing and best of luck in the contest.


  • Little Eagle Greeters member
    January 8, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Thanks for entering

    A cute little poem about firsts. Kind of like a little PSA on first loves.

    Good luck in the contest and welcome to allpoetry.

    God Bless
    Tammy

1 - 9 of 9