Author notes
word bank words used: (all of them)
consistant, grasping, vermillion
swaying, caustic, encompassing
truth, hue, enduring, verdant
suspended, flight, bower
for best of Ap contest: http://allpoetry.com/column/2334050
In a list
A contest entry
- Give me your best ! by vasi.
700 points, ended March 10, 2007, 123 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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You use 13 words..OK, but how have you used them. I will judge.Hold on. Let me look...consistant, good... "grasping fine"..Vermillion..you got me here.... never heard of it...swaying..thats easy...caustic..as in laca..I willaccept this, barely.."encompassing..I'm cool
with this..."hue..What the heck does that mean?"..Verdant covered hillside..That works, I guess...Wher is hue?..I found it...OK...suspended in flight..2 for 1..Good for you.OK, this would take me too much time, and would come out awfull, for sure, yet you have that mind of yours, whicl allows you to walk the plank without getting wet. I am jealous. What else is new, my dear.Imagery is what comes to mind, to me. This one has it, and you know it. After all you won, right?. You have turned all the turmoil below into a life lesson. You have become a better person for seeing this evil present itself before you.,,You hyave taken a lousy situation and made it apositive one for you. If there is a hidden message here, you would not tell me, as usual. You keep it all for yourself. Drives me crazy, but thats you. Through devestation comes beauty and hope. Hopefully this is your only message, and it is a wonderfull one. If I have missed anything, dear, you need to let me know....Tonight..OK?,
Till then
John
Longfellow
Faulkner

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This was a very descriptive piece. Within destruction to find hope is a beautiful thing. I really liked this line: "solidify the unity between spiritual and religious" and the concept of it, as spirituality and religion are two completely different things. -
I liked the theme and description in this poem. I thought it was well written and I can tell I lot of true emotion and feeling was put into this poem when writing it. Message me if you want your score, make sure to include the name of your poem. Thanks for entering.
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good poem and nice description! Thank you for entering and good luck in the contest!
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such vivid description. Very well written. Good luck in the contests.
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thank you for entering!
over all score is a 3 -
I thought the flow and wording was nice, good ending. An interesting and intriguing piece.
~Ryan~ -
I like how you are able to connect an event that many do not know much about to your own life. I was expecting an educational poem when i clicked this one open, only to find that it is truly a great work of imagery and visual wording. Thank you very much for your entry and good luck
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nice imagery
your words have painted a great picture, although the flow is a tad bumpy, it still reads decently well. -
Wow... the imagery in this one just blows me away! You took that word bank and turned it into a masterpiece! It is easy to see why this one did so well! I wish you all the best with it once more. Well worth the read!
Blessings,
Frogz~ -
very good
powerful images in your words
thank you for entering and best of luck
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I lLOVE this...finding hope and faith out of destruction isn't an easy thing to do (trust me i know)..and this sounds like an actual experience you had..it's to vivd and real not to be..unless you've a fantastic imagination...peace and harmony to you..desi
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Empowering
great use of word bank and very descriptive. i like it alot...left me thinking at the end. Great image picture for the poem too. A great poem!
Becky


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Hi ,I live in a country where there are 3 active vocanos every so often they put on a show, the earth is still in evolution and will be (if she survives) for a few millions years more, the power of nature can be frightening but man is far more frightening as far as I am concerned, good write, all the best in the comp, hugs Di
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a great work..
It is a huge scenrio...a huge canvas to elaborate the versions of our life and this way you are very successful and very powerfuly expressed this great story here...The structure and the word power which you have used here is just amazing revealing the hidden agenda of the mysteres of life which you are eager to unfold time and time again...You are here behaving like a magician of the poetic calibre... a great work... -
quite a challenge, i must say, and admirablely met, i think, with a brilliant and highly image laden poem that is balanced and creative. there are some overly wordy spots, places where the line could be cut but i am not sure doing that would enhance the poem much more. i do feel, however, less is more and try to keep that in mind when i write. so dont let my opinion disuade you, it is a worthy effort. blessings and best wishes, ~richard
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Very good!
It flows well, and does not veer of course. Kinda preachy though...
Maybe if you told us your inspiration for this particular poem?
Overall: 4/5
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E X C E L L E N T
beautifully imaged; you capture the violence of Nature unleashed perfectly. One doesn't just read the poem, they experience it through your perfect words. BRAVA! -
Oh My
Wow the heat from the volcano really felt good on this frozen ground morning. Good luck in the contest!! My favorite part was:
they say all things happen for a reason
today nature set the stage
for one of the greatest performances
I have ever witnessed
and through the devastation
comes beauty and hope
just as that hillside will grow new life
I too will begin to grow with a new outlook
one of hope and beauty with the knowledge
that to lose sight of the bigger picture
means a certain doom -
WOW!!!!!
I loved the picture, which only added to the rest of the write!!! Perfect together my friend!!! Thank you so much for sharing such a wonderful write with everyone here!!! Best of luck in the contest my friend!!! Keep that pen flowing!!!
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wow i really like this
the words are so poetic...(i wonder why...lol) and so imagae orientated.. yeah just wow i really like the message
good job!!!
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WOW!!!
Very strong and deep write. Wonderful use of a word bank to make such a smooth reading and meaningful poem. It holds you attention and makes you wonder where it is going to the end. Which I must say is incredible...
The ending it's self is amazing.
Wonderful job, my friend.
Best to you, in a wonderful journey of understanding...may be all be so graced at some point in life.
To find an awarness so strong and find our peace on our spiritual learning!
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very good
thank you for sharing this very interesting read with us,a great job with the given word bank,good luck in the contest and keep up the good work

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Very Good!!!!
Speechless,,,, That is a most wonderful poem,,,Loved it!!!!!

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this is a nice read with vivid imagery throughout the entire piece you used the word banlk quuite well deep and intriguing poem you have written.
Love and light,
Blaze -
Wow! I have read many of your poems before, and as always, this was simply amazing! I love the descriptions that you use when you are describing everything you see and feel. I have always enjoyed reading your writes, and shall continue to check on then any time I'm online. I Always think they are amazing, as are you!! Great Write!
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It's amazing how we can finding the meaning of life in nature. I love your metaphor and the revelation that came out of the volcano, so to speak! The last stanza is a great way to look at life... it's a positively beautiful comparison. I'm bookmarking this one!
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Simply beautiful...a great revelation kickstarted by observing nature, something that I like to read and write about myself. Very well done.
Rory
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"grasping at the sight below" is that supposed to say gasping or grasping? i do like the way you described the volcano from a helicopters view. very origional
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wowwwww this was amazing aunt suzi..who cuda fort that word bank cud inspire such a butiful poem ...good luck in the contest ...smiles ~cheeky~


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WOW!!!!!!!!
This is a wonderful poem,of truth and faith renewed Nature can be our friend or our worse enemy.But after it all it brings us all closer together and reminds us how very small we really are.
GOOD LUCK
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Such words sets ones imagination on fire...these thoughts of such awful endings...ones that we can not run from...that is why the thoughts plant there seed...to make one relize life is precious...nicely done...thanks for sharing
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Great Job
This piece really said alot to me. The metaphors are strong and easy to connect. I love the way you painted a picture of spirituality and religion as well as your ties between them as an occurance of nature that shows strength even in the harshest conditions. I am deeply spiritual but dont consider my self religious. I am ok however with what anyone chooses to believe and that has led me to a realization. There is only one true spirit and religion and that is the truth that is based in love. Great poem I had to read it three times. I think its wonderful.

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Oh suzi this is extraordinary
your words are so moving... seriously I love them. Great job with this poem, good luck to you!!!
~ Kerri
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OH MY GOODNESS!
Where do I begin...
FIRST: Your use of the word bank is simply incredible...you did a fantastic job with the word bank.
SECOND: The flow of this poem is PERFECT...it leads the reader into the realm of the storyline/message with such ease and grace!
THIRD: The message of hope within this write brings tears to my eyes...this is uplifting and very spiritual to my heart. I love a write that finds the message of hope within EVERYTHING...because I truly believe there is hope within all...sadly, it is rarely witnessed and even more rarely...confessed!
YOU ARE GRAND MY DEAR...IN EVERY WAY YOU ARE GRAND.
I shall add you to my fav's...lest I miss any of your masterful writing!
I am better for having read your words...and I am grateful.
Blessings!
Tammy
































