Love you say?
dosent exist...
Pain?
dosent hurt when its all you've felt
Happiness?
can only be felt ...by those YOU make happy..
Why do people strive for these?
because..these are the choices of feeling....
not just any feeling..but feeling of acceptance.
Ever felt like your parents cant stand you?
Love.....
Ever get kicked in special spot number one or hit in the chest?
pain.....
That first memory of a birthday party?
happiness...
see these things effect our lives...
but do we accpet them ...
Love...
dosent exist....
Pain....
dosent hurt..if it's all you've felt
Happiness...
can only be felt by those who YOU make happy...
acceptance is key...
Author notes
this is something i congured up to get rid of my writers block... and kinda also to my ap mommeh. she is going through a ruff patch and this is just somthing to help us get through it. love you mommeh (miserablealphawolf)and for the contest im in..."lovelost"
for the present contest: depression, confusion, sad, feelings
A contest entry
- Love Lost or unreconized -prewrites excepted by Poet-of-the-shadows.
375 points, ended January 7, 2007, 19 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Deep emotions by Ntagatf.
500 points, ended April 3, 2007, 24 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - All or nothing kids by lust in a grenade.
306 points, ended May 25, 2007, 31 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Contest to Promote my Commenting ANYTHING GOES!! by Timeless Wisdom.
800 points, ended August 6, 2007, 261 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 26 of 26
-
...
-
magical
With this piece, you have officially become my new best friend (i.e.. things i wish i had said). Nice!
TYVM for loving on my entry, gives me warm fuzzies (lol) Warmly, Chrissy
-
Love you say?
dosent exist...
Pain?
dosent hurt when its all you've felt
i love it very dark good job -
STUNNING!!!!
STUNNING WRITING, AND THIS IS SO TRUE TOO. I LOVED THIS. I LOVE THE MEANING OF THIS AND THE FLOW OF THE PIECE. I WILL READ MORE OF YOUR WORK.
WAYNE
-
so true. i really liked it. helps get your creative spirt going
-
I like anything that makes people think; that breaks the normal barrier of cliches and over-used vocabulary, whether it be poetry, movies, or songs. This did exactly that, and you did a great job my fellow poet.
-
I like it, It gets the reader thinking.. or exleast it definatly got me thinking
I love how u repeated the first part, to finish off the poem. I think it made those words stand out more and have more depth and meaning. I think this is an amazing peice and you did a great job!
-
I like this... it has a kinda philosical view on the way our emotions work and the way we feel... really makes me stop to think things over... great job and kewl write...
-
very differnet from most things that i've read, well, the way you wrote it out. i loved how you started of with a couple of points, touched up on them, then started back at square one . great write/
-mandy
-
hmm
Many people would say that i was a cynicalist about love, especially the ones from my area, but I have to disagree with you and say that it is possible of existing. Also i would suggest thinking deeper on your subject especially when its going to deny a feeling that so many accomplished authors among others hold so highly and speak of so greatly. Also
"effect" in line 16 should be affect -
sweet
I enjoyed this, really I did. It was really well written and you didn't make it rhyme but it still had a flow to it. I thought it was great! keep up the good work!
-
Very raw and pwerful write indeed. I would like to suggest using spellcheck to fix a few minor ones and your use of ellipses is a tad off, but hey if you like it, go for it!! this is just a thought! Best of luck in this and all of your endeavors.
Peg
-
..................
thank you for the nicer comments...some were unnessecary..but thank you.
-
I think it's pure truth. You captured what most of us can't and you didn't even have to rhyme to do so. ^_^ If we can't accept these things in our life, what more can we do? You have to accept that they're there and if you don't, then you doubt that they are. It's one way or the other and acceptance is definitely the key. Great write.
-
Neat
I think this was very good. In my experiance, poetry is merely a lot of words that don't rhyme and rarely make sense. The poem doesn't have to rhyme, but it helps when you understand what a writer is trying to say. I love it.
-
sweet
I loved it Jessie. It was so good. You have a good talent.
-
I like the repeated portion.:-)
-
-
hehe
thank you..i think i couldve done better though
-
-
OMGoshness, sissa! super awesomeness.... sad, but awesome. I luffle it! (Wish my block-breakers were this good... mine suck eggs. Like weasels.) Hehe. Anyhow, I am very happy for you.
Skye
PS: thanks for the publicity on your author's page.
-
i realy enjoyed this
-
thanks daughter, it was good
-
thank you for teh entry :-) and I did enjoy the way it was written :-) please keep writeing
-
thanks
thank you all for your criticing and helpful comments on my poem -
wow that was a terrific poem and very well put in order..it had a strong ending which made it even more outstanding..great job and goodluck in my contest
-
The key...
acceptance is when you try to accept all your problems and pains and try to get past all your mistakes and flaws and anything bad that is when you have accepted your self the next thing is to do the same when you want to accept others. But overall your poem was great u cood probablee win a contest wid id.
-
This is excellent even if it weren't writers block, better because you've written something so good with it, especially off of only three words, you took them and made a poem i've never seen before, most people would have made it into a very common poem
GREAT job
diggin it majorly
Adding your comment:
1 - 26 of 26
