He told me he loved me
But it wasn't real
I loved him then
And love him still
How could i have been that stupid
To believe the words he said
Still the pain lingers
I fell as if im dead.
He hurt me once
But it doesnt end
To hurt me twice
Hes with my friend!
He toyed with my emotions
I still love him...
Everyday the pain
of seeing them.
Together they are
Together they stay!
He loves her, and her him
Well, thats what they say!
He told ME he loved ME
But it wasn't real
I loved him then
And love him still.
A contest entry
- January New Members Contest by AP Greeters.
600 points, ended February 15, 2007, 120 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
I want a future in poetry... what do you think?
Comments
1 - 12 of 12
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Welcome to AllPoetry
This poem brings back so many memories for me. It is hard to truly love someone and then have them rip that carpet from underneath you and tear your soul apart in the process.
The poem has a fluid flow and good rhythm - I truly enjoyed this read.
Let the ink flow and your fingers dance
Rosemary -
Looooove it. Reminds me of my ex. <33 you're pretty damn amazing too. <33
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Welcome to All Poetry!
Betrayal is never easy - and you display that well with this piece. I was a bit bothered by the "exclamation marks", but that said, everyone has a different way of creating impact to their words.
Thank you for entering the contest
I wish you luck and welcome you to All Poetry!
abscessed
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fantastic
I love the the first pargraph most, and when you used it again at the end, that was it for me it had me wrapped. Keep up the good work!
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I loved him then
And love him still
I love these two lines and the repetition.
This is a great poem although the subject is not my cup of tea. But I think this was quite well written.
I wish you lots of lucdk in this contest!
Keep on writing!
Annie
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Thank you for your entry and welcome to Allpoetry!
This is a very sad write. I liked the repetition of "I loved him then and I love him still"
Second stanza fourth line "feel" rather then "fell"
Third stanza last line "He's" rather then "Hes"
Fourth stanza last line "Of" with a capital, as all else is capitals.
This was a sad write. I know what it is like to be betrayed like this
Good luck in the contest and welcome to allpoetry
Faerie
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Repetition is often a great tool to exercise in poetry, I myself use it quite often and enjoy doing so. I do not usually care for rhyme, but I can certainly relate to the content of this poem. I went through such a similiar experience, as I am sure many girls have, so I know some of what you feel.
As for a future in poetry, I am with you there, I hope you make it!
Welcome to AllPoetry, its great to have another poet among us. If you ever need a comment on a poem, send me the link, and I would be more than happy to stop back by!
good luck
-shirley- -
thanks and welcome to the site
Thanks for entering in the contest, and thank you for sharing this with us.. I liked it, the first love and heartbreak, I think you did a good job. I found one typo in there "fell" should be feel but that was the only one I seen, and the rhyme is not to forced, you found some good words to use for it..
keep it up and good luck in the contest!!
Krystal -
Welcome to Allpoetry!
This is definately a poem that most people can relate to based on at least one past experience. It is songlike in rhythm and it flows nicely from thought to thought. I suppose that we always assume that when someone hurts us we stop loving them. That is not always, nor normally the case. We may eventually get past it, but the love doesn't just go away just because things didn't work out.
Good luck in the contest and, once more welcome to the site
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Thanks for the entry and welcome to the site!
When love fades away, it is best to say your goodbyes and try to get on with life. I know a lot of people will relate to your words you have penned here. They do seem to come from personal experience and not just fiction. I like this poem because there is truth and real-life weaved in it. Very good work Thank you very much for taking the time to write for` and enter our contest. Best wishes and welcome to Allpoetry
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amazing
I love this poem I know the feeling and im still dealing with it seems like they just want to hurt you and hurt you well ne ways great write
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Thanks for entering
I can imagine how this must feel. To be betrayed by someone you thought would love you for all time its even harder when you have to see that person with their new love all the time.
Good luck in the contest and welcome to allpoetry.
God Bless
Tammy
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