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A world wakens a world sleeps

Dew sparkles

crisp morning air

golden rays peak

over horizon

 

Eastern stars

rest in daylight

western stars

appear as dusk

falls

 

Stillness unsettles

birds stir

half a world wakes

day

 

stillness pervades

birds nest

half a world sleeps

night

 

tide goes out

sea reflects a

rising moon

 

Peace

dreams

Please tell me what you think

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Comments

1 - 17 of 17

  • lilemily314
    June 12, 2007
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    this is very gentle and peaceful..lovely

  • Papyrus
    May 10, 2007

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    I have appreciated your work ever since you greeted me, when I first joined the site. This poem, with its depth, yet simple construction, has a calming charm to it.

    Another testamony to your great skill!

    Thanx-Papyrus


  • Lonewolf2008 gold member
    March 3, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Delight to read

    Reflecting on the turning of the earth and how life is affected by the spinning and tilt and its long trip around the sun. Very nice.


  • Samplette gold member
    February 20, 2007

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    Such a peaceful and beautiful picture you paint with your words. Reading them gave me a calm feeing. Wonderful write..
    Sam

  • azlyn gold member
    February 16, 2007

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    That was a beautifully written poem. The words floated gently through my mind and settled softly upon my heart. I loved this..."tide goes out...sea reflects a...rising moon" that is so precious. I can envision this write so clearly. I love the moon upon the water. I used to just sit and wait for that when I would go camping on a full moon night. What more could one ask for?
    Blessed Be!
    Azlym


  • Jax Nova
    February 12, 2007
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    Lovely!

    I really like this one, it's very nice. Excelent job

  • poetryality silver member
    February 8, 2007

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    A Comely Work of Word-Art!

    I simply adored this poem. I have often spent much thought knowing that although the sun is shining brightly where I sit, somewhere there is a full moon blazing at the same time. This poem points that fact right at me. I love this!


    Much Love ♥

    Renee


  • Jax Nova
    February 6, 2007

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    Love it

    I really like this piece. Nice job! I like the subject and the way it is written.


  • k2vet
    January 26, 2007
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    I like it

    Its very gentle. Very spritual almost. Well done
  • amy86
    January 21, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    lovely

    Firstly thankyou for commenting on my poem.I am not used to doing reviewsbut I love the way your poem is so peaceful and calming. You have chosen some lovely words xxx

  • Climbing2nothing
    January 19, 2007

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    Natural glory

    afraid i have to agree with alittle of the 'too pruned' commentary yet on the other hand I love zenful writing, it's just that although your words paint the mind in simple imagery that is beautiful as the nature in the dawn is brought about in peace, some of the specific words might be changed to produce a more free flowing image such as 'over horizons', or 'a world awakes today' and maybe 'half a world sleeps in night' sorry if I come across as a bit picky on the whole your painting reminds me of the beauty I miss because of my laziness to sleeping in and grants the serenity to what i see around A beautiful coastline that i am blessed to live on and so i thank you


  • panegyric ink
    January 11, 2007
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    this is so beautiful.

    very humbling.


  • Morningstar1948 gold member
    January 6, 2007

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    beautiful

    This how dreamtime feel. you relax and let the tide come and take you out and bring you home again. This is a great piece and I love it.


  • Meet Virginia
    January 5, 2007
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    It is a little jerky as far as the rhythm goes, but the words are beautiful. It's a great start!


  • January 5, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    This is too clipped. The line length doesn't add to the poem. It makes the poem hard to read. There is no real flow or rythmn to it. It is also too pruned.

    • Little Feather Greeters member
      January 5, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Thank you for your honest critique

      I have done some editing. If you would care to take a look and see what you think of it now, I would appreciate it.

      God Bless
      Tammy
1 - 17 of 17