Moving on now..
lets change the subject as usual...
Ignore the newly formed scars
etched across my shell
-rag dolls tear so easy-
Its not sleep, its passing out
but whatever works.
stale beer and cigarettes
a smell ive come accustom to..
Failing to do this right
im sorry ive not done this before
-I never denied this was me-
Cant see the point in this anymore
[[than ever before]]
But..
Would it make a difference
if i told you it scared me..
..more than anything
[[not that a difference i want to make..
you never did understand]]
Just i would give my life to heal yours
Just... i would give my life to know...
But then again...
...
Your always in control.
Author notes
Yeah, its not my usual, just came out. dunno...makes sense to me anyway. not great, not even good i know lol..but yeah.
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 12 of 12
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Perfect
I like it. I've known so many people like this it's insane. My only suggestion is to add in a coma after the word just in 4th line (with words) to the end. -
beautiful words.
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Awsome...I love this write!! It flows!!
Your always in control.
I love it...Idk it just explains alot!! Keep up the good work and feel free to check out my page anytime!
Jess
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Really nicely done. I especially liked the line "rag dolls tear so easily". I think you expressed yourself well and then ending was great!
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you are an awesome writter. i loved this poem...keep it up.
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great!!
Well done sian, twas good, man your a good writer!!
My favourite part was-
Would it make a difference
if i told you it scared me..
..more than anything
because I know exactly what your talking about..
soon..
Loves xXx
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"Its not sleep, its passing out
but whatever works.
stale beer and cigarettes
a smell ive come accustom to.."
Loved that part
Great job hunnie! Hope you're doing okayyy<3
You're a wonderfulllll writer♥
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aww
tis a very sad poem, but extremely well written, love the way youve laid it out!! aww i aint seen u in ages!! hope all is gd, n im sorry 2 hear bout u n rhian all the best x x x
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i like this poem... ur a good writer keep on writeing
~karla~
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This is terrific, a great sense of sadness and confusion here. Very mysterious and interesting.
I thoroughly enjoyed reading this.
xXxPurexXx
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intense. dont be a rag-doll forever
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Returning The Favor!
WOW... is all I can say. I love this write. I can relate to it... more than anything at this time.
"Just I would give my life to heal yours Just... I would give my life to know... But then again... Your always in control."
Those lines... wow, they hit home for me on so many different levels. *I added you to my favorites*.
Magnifico a tanti livelli. Amo il senso che avete trasportato le vostre emozioni in questo poem.
~*xxAngelicWingsxx*~
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