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Will you pass the syrup please?

Hands. Everywhere.
Wings of flesh, flapping,
wildly coveting.

There. Syrup.
Standing like an amber tower,
wooden horizon.

Voices. Passionate.
Sonic vibrations, screaming,
"Mine! Mine!"

Grin. Success.
As a steady arm,
greedily ceases.

Glares. Betrayal.
The container conquered,
for now...

Author notes

Thought of this for a contest.

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think...pretty please?

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments


  • deadfix
    January 13, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    OMG I LOVE YOU! No really, I do. Lol.


  • Dienush
    January 7, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    This is funny but the descriptions in the beginning are also nice for themselves. This succint style is great for humor. Thanks for entering.

    ~Diana


  • Golden Guardian
    January 6, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Hmm, haha, I like it.