Sitting here thinking of when we were last together,
I’ve never felt so alive… no not ever.
When I looked up and saw you walk into the room,
my heart paced, and there was a boom.
Everything in my world stood still.
You became my thoughts, dreams,, everything to me that’s real.
In my eyes, you were a painting being painted.
So deep of emotions you stirred up in me... my heart fainted.
My eyes like a sable brush flowed with your hair.
You were my minds canvas, as I stood to pull out your chair.
Your song spoke salutations… as “Good Afternoon” pierced your lips.
Pinned by your scent, your legs bent as you parked your hips.
A table of three… that was meant for two,
I saw heaven when I saw you.
Will your heart ever let me in?
You’re his date… and I'm his friend.
With no idea of how I feel,
he gabbed on … as my world stood still.
Life is such, and so is fate.
Never invite a friend… on a blind date.
A contest entry
- You Love Them, But They Don't Love You by captaincrazy.
450 points, ended January 3, 2007, 11 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - DATE WITH A TWIST by esroddo.
600 points, ended May 25, 2007, 12 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Give Me Love...With a Twist by Hidden.
480 points, ended June 7, 2008, 38 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Easy Points by goodwriter.
1200 points, ended August 14, 5 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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Great job. You are the second person moving on in this contest. I need you to keep going with your poetry due to the fact you have wonderfull ryming and a wonderful poem going for you. Two thumbs up on that one
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good imagery.
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Wow, this was enthralling. I loved the visuals you gave me. Great job. Thanks for entering and good luck.
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Beatifully expressed
Well applauded write I can see why you won silver. The tell that happens on occasion. You fall in love with your friends girl or guy with really wanting to it just happens. We don't command our hearts. Thank you for entering and good luck(Lisa)
"Pinned by your scent, your legs bent as you parked your hips.
A table of three… that was meant for two,
I saw heaven when I saw you.
Will your heart ever let me in?"
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Wow! I really enjoyed reading this piece! I know how it feels, but to hear a guys perspective on what it is like was extremely insightful and you captured the emotion and feelings beautifully! Great job! I hope you have found yourself another love.
Halleluja
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wow. this is good. i liked it a lot. thanks so much for entering the contest and good luck to you!!!!
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!!!you are so right!!!
this is so good.Truth unfolds so strongly within your words.There is such beauty in this write with a passion that is over whelming.
I really enjoyed this write.The ending is truly sad.
God Bless
~Cheryl~ -
true.
i love the way you went into deep emotion, and the word choice you used.
great piece! -
Very well done, my friend!
I enjoyed reading this and you wrote it so very well!
All the best to you!
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