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Painted shadows mutely danced, by a campfire’s dying ebb,
As smoke climbed ever slowly, hanging like a spider’s web.
Stark chills of night’s clear air, brought shivers from the breeze,
Through moonlit shadows cloaked, ‘neath silver painted trees.
Glittering stars tried in vain to conquer the dark forbidding sky,
While an old piper prepared his pipes, beside the fire close by.
Past memories suddenly appeared, inspiring me as he played,
Gentle fingers caressed the pipes, his mood in truth portrayed.
Equally at home on a broadsword hilt, wet with crimson blood,
Or lovingly washing his bairn’s hair, matted with dried up mud.
For nothing stirs the fires of pride, than the pipes skirling loud,
Memories imbedded in my genes, now rushing thick and proud.
Many wars Scots have fought, they are warriors true and true,
I know these things somehow and seen those battlefields too.
Hysterical screams of dismay, while sounds of angry steel ring,
Shouts and cries of fighting, as the swordsmen hack and swing.
Wondrous beauty of cradled Lochs, beneath heather coated hills,
Rock bastions loom overhead, as mist downward smoothly spills.
A land of chaste enchantment, but contradictory in the extreme,
Brave hearts full of family pride, worldwide held in high esteem.
Peace reigns all over as laughter, echoes across emerald fields,
Warriors are home with loved ones and valour in silence yields.
But dormant until needed and the swords nestle in their sheaths,
As contented families savour thoughts, of never buying wreaths.
The pipes recall past gallant deeds, as the piper proudly skirls,
To rhythmic beats booming, blurred drumsticks spinning twirls.
A million thoughts and sensations that swell the pride so sweet,
The shaking ground underneath from hundreds of dancing feet.
I wonder if within this lifetime I will again see my ancient home,
So I can casually wander without fear, to explore and freely roam.
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In a list
A contest entry
- The perfect poem by xandercheerios.
800 points, ended March 3, 2007, 26 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Throw me your best fantasy by Lively Matter.
525 points, ended March 5, 2007, 11 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - give me something deep by Poetic Drug.
360 points, ended April 2, 2007, 29 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Sacred Chants & Hymns Of Praise by Mercury Rising.
1000 points, ended August 17, 2007, 18 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Dedication to the past... by skyviewexpress.
450 points, ended September 30, 2007, 8 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 31 of 31
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Beautiful poem, wonderful exercising of vocabulary, very mature writing. Loved the poem, just having a hard trouble finding the relevance to Charles Bukowski and Edgar Allen Poe, could you help me there? Other then that good luck in my contest.
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A very emotional and heart-felt hymn you have penned here, which was a real pleasure to read. You've obviously put a lot of thought, as well as heart and soul into your excellent poem. Best of luck in my contest, and thanks for entering this marvelous piece.
David
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Perfection
Wow, that was beautiful. I am Scotish, among a few other things, and this just made me smile. Your work is simply fantastic. Thanks to owlishunter for sending me your way.
Hugs, Vampy
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speechless
again speechless! the beauty and imagery leaves me lost for words which usually I am not. Unbelivable work of art! One of the best I have read on this site, I am serious! by the way my husband and I dream to dance in a Scottish castle to Unchained Melody. Your country is beautiful!
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Barry, I loved this one. The visuals are so strong, but the emotion carried me through with great anticipation. I do love the pipes and so many of your images stood out with brilliant visuals of your ancestral land. I dream of seeing these things one day ~ so steeped in history. Battle cries still ring out across many fields and probably if you stand quietly by you may hear the clashing of swords. A wonderfully visual poem and much enjoyed by this reviewer. Well done. Best, Elizabeth
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I wish to see them too and the other night I was watching The Highlander (Sean Connery) and I almost burst into tears when I saw portions of that movie, and immediately sat down and wrote Heights of Ecstasy purely inspired by the scenery .... Wait until you read the others and you will understand even more ... I have gained several great Scottish friends from there who are incredulous that i have never been there lol
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very good, It was full of very good describing words, and it had a very good flow, the story line is very deep. Thanks for entering the contest and good luck
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a beautiful write
Bazza,I am truly in awe of this poem.lovely worded visually illustrated, THANK you for sharing,MM
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Wonderful comment
Glad you liked it and such a wonderful compliment from such an accomplished poet. Thanks love, I really appreciate the wonderful comment with the added bonus of your applause. I think I will just concentrate on my picture poems as I have so much fun building up the picture then painting it with words .. great fun...
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HEARTFELT & SOULFUL, Indeed!!!!!
I wonder if within this lifetime I will again see my ancient home,
So I can casually wander without fear, to explore and freely roam.
A fine piece, me friend! I enjoyed the time that we spend together today oceans apart in body by joined together (in a manly way. LOL)
in kindred heart and soul! Never let go of your dreams, Brother - for they are real and will live in you forever -as does all of the hopes and dreams from these Pipers from the Past!
Peace & Love!
Earl.
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And there we have it. A PERFECT POEM... finally. I can't tell you to improve on anything, because there is nothing to improve on! And no, I'm not just saying that, I'm really getting tired of all these people entering pre-writes just b/c there's a chance that they might win. THANK YOU! You have definitely caught my attention, and get bonus points for using the word skirls...which I have no idea what it really means, but I'm guessing something like what a bagpiper does (a specific word instead of "plays") I can't even say enough!
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Thank you.
Well, that was a wonderful comment... thanks for the applause too .. I am humblede by your support. Yes, the first Scottish poem (I am an Aussie) I wrote I was quickly told that the bagpipes do not 'squark' (for want of a better word) ... they SKIRL ... and there you have it .. spot on. I hope you have the time to read some of my other poems because every one (except one) rhyme and flow much the same. The nit pickers try to pick holes but very few can suggest something better.Thanks again, I am humbled by your encouragement. -
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Sounds wonderful mate, and if you ask me after this contest is over, I will definitely look at your other poems.
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Thank you for taking the time to comment and I am glad you liked it. thanks mate.
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Well written!!!
Straight forward & very easy to read, great Job!!! -
Awestruck
Good Day
I really like this work. Its amazing, such good imagry and word usage. I may be young, but the message behind this is a powerful one, Great Piece! -
This is such an amazingly vivid piece...bravo! Beautifully flowing and superbly written...as always! I truly hope one day you seize the chance to go home, reuniting with that ancient past!!
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This is immaculate in every way --the flow and rhyme are both perfect again. You always pen with such passion and this is clearly seen in your work. Congratulations on a really wonderful write----and this comes from a true yorkshire lass through and through
By the way---we are off to Scotland in August for my birthday. I'm sure this poetry will come to mind during my stay. Excellent.Well done.
Shaz xx
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Shaz, you for we are a real jewell, your contributions to the site are excellent and always of good taste, verve and beauty as well as your feedback and comments. I am glad you enjoyed it and hope that we continue on this course.
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Highlighting the Highlands
Hi Bazza ~ Happy New Year to you!
I love the way you weave the often violent and heroic past into this piece, because it was what forged and shaped the land of the brave into what it is today. The very hills speak to us of the bloody battles that were won and lost at their feet. Recent movies have spread the beauty and grandeur of Scotland to the world, and have enchanted us with the soulful and stirring sound of the bagpipes.
I could hear them as clear as a bell whilst reading your poem, and I could smell the heather and feel a brisk wind on my face.
Fantastic visuals here:
'Wondrous beauty of cradled Lochs, beneath heather coated hills,
Rock bastions loom overhead, as mist downward smoothly spills.'
Brilliant! I feel as though I've just sat through Braveheart and had a whirlwind trip to Scotland all rolled into one! Thank you for the excellent free ride
!
Best wishes, Lou x
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A humble thank you.
Lou, actually I was stirred up (Very strongly)watching the Edinborough Tattoo on TV. The sight of the Pipe Majors in full ceremonial uniform was inspiring to say the least. I immediately sat down and wrote the poem above for the rest of the night until it was finished. It will get my usual edit soon (get rid of the pernickety bits as someone suggested lol) and fine tune it then. Are you performing at the CMCA ralley in April in Casino ?? Which state do you hail from ?? I live around the corner from Glenny Palmer ... know her ?? She's a professional performer and writer of Oz Bush Poetry.Must see Braveheart one day ... probably wait until it comes on Tv as I can't sit still in the movies.
Thanks for your wonderful comments garnished with the sweet taste of applause ... Barry
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Fantastic!!!!!!!
I truly love those pipes, our family too, came from Scotland, though I don't know to much about them, but someday I would like to walk along those same lands as did my forefathers. Thanks so much for sharing this piece.
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Lovely comment.
Thank you for your kind comments and wonderful applause. I dont know where the Scottish influence comes from but I enjoy the feelings that come to me though so I have much fun writing about them.
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wow
why did i not knw u had scottish blood?....... goes to read back on notes .. mwahhhhhh xxxxx -
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Thanks for reading
My Scottish blood goes back over 5 generations on my Grandmother's side as well as Yorkshire on my Grandfather's side ... Dad's family were English but he thinks some may have thrown boomerangs long ago lol ... but seriously, I cannot explain the Feelings that come to me that ar of Scottish .....
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Hmm an interesting poem! I liked it. Where'd you get the idea for this poem? Your a great poet! Keep up the great work. I'll be around to read and comment more on your poems. Happy New Years by the way. Take care!
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This is a beautiful pipers poem
I love the theme of this poem is it echoes throughout this piece. I alos loe its arrangement in couplets. This shows that war is not a good thing! -
I have been a fan of the pipes since I first heard them as a child. Of course now as an adult I can really dream to the sometime haunting sounds of them. Unfortunately there is very little opportunity for me to hear them here unless on a cd. I do hope you get to go home one of this days...to wear your colors proudly or to walk clad in beige/brown tartan amongst the meadows and fields. Let's hear it for Scotland
reenie
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A lovely tribute to your homeland and the piper is surely a mystic sound that comes from the mists of time throughout Scotlands past. I enjoyed the chance to go roamin' with you.
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