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Winter From Here

A blanket of warmth keeps her longer in bed
Until she hears the resonant sounds of laughter
Seeping through the bedroom walls
And bringing her morning to life on this winter day.

Outside, nature is dressed in sparkling white.
The scene touches the depth of her heart
And draws her out the door into this world
Where snow becomes something quite magical.

She meets her friends draped in jackets and scarves
Around the corner in what should be the park
And armed with sleds and snowmobiles
They plan their day of unending fun.

So, I am not sure if I will ever know what winter is like
But maybe one day I will wake up to it just as she does.
However, for now I can truly say
That on the television it looks like it will be a lovely winter day.

 

 

Copyright Z.F.M. 

Author notes

I've seen snow but I've never experienced winter fully.

gentle breeze

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Comments

1 - 15 of 15

  • Hebz
    June 16, 2007

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    Great Penning!!

    Love the imagery here so much...

    Thanks alot for entering my contest & Best of Luck

    GloriousGift
    Heba


  • confessionsofmysoul
    May 19, 2007

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    lovely

    i love snow.... &&i miss it ever scince i moved to florida... i admire the fact that your verses are full....
    i have a really weird style and cant seem to ever write more than one line at a time .... but the visual effects you created were very convincing .. a very good write..

    --jeffery


    • gentle breeze
      May 19, 2007
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      thanks very much for stopping here and reading my poem. I truly appreciate it.


  • blondone
    January 20, 2007

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    Oh a beautiful picture you have painted of a lovely winter day very well written and the words flow with ease good luck in this contest...now a comment for your authors notes a quick look into a full winter beware not as pretty LOL ( it's been months since I've seen my picnic table out back, another snow storm on it's way, my new born 3 days old and I got to get to the store but can not open my front door for the snow has drifted on my porch and locked me in I must call and hope a friend can reach me to shovel off a pathway to my door not to worried I'm reached and all is fine ) or how about this ( ever morning you must get up early enough to brush th ecar off with a broom frist then scrape the ice then shovel the drive just to get to work ) LOL yes snow is beauiful for a day or two but not for months at a time I now live where it does not snow but maybe once or twice a year and I do not miss snow at all... p.s. where do you live? I talk about cleveland ohio in my stories and live in beautiful tennessee...


  • solarman
    January 12, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    It's soooo cold

    Greta write! I feel colder already.

  • solarman
    January 11, 2007
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    Awesome!


  • Vernal Bloom
    January 7, 2007

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    Beautiful, my dear!

    I think you have painted the winter more beautiful than maybe other who experienced it. The poem shows that you are a good observer and that is enough to write on anything. I myself live in a town which is surrounded by mountains from three sides so you can guess how cold here is! Our sun is not going to show herself to us and pat us with her timid beams sometimes I wish summer comes soon because coldness is too bitter to endure. I am just a bit wonder that you describe winter and snow that great while your country doesn’t have it! It’s so good. Ahsantom tabarakallah!!
    Thank you for sharing with us and all the best in the contest :-)

    ~Massy~
    P.S. where do you live exactly? I’m curious to know!


  • Puppydog gold member
    January 4, 2007

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    THIS IS A VERY BEAUTIFUL POEM!

    Ah, the dreams we have! I do live in an area that has snow in the winter and I see the other three seasons, I do hope you get your wish one day.


    • gentle breeze
      January 4, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Thanks much for your comments and applause. I'm really glad you enjoyed this. Thanks for your wishes as well.


  • Starswhispers silver member
    January 4, 2007

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    A lovely piece I like that you don't know about snowy winter and still write about it and how you manage to say all this in a very poetic way. A very unjoyable reading.

    • gentle breeze
      January 4, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you very much for your comments and applause. I appreciate them


  • Anna Kay
    January 3, 2007

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    I was really surprised (and amazed) how well you managed to capture winter without having experienced fully so far! So much to the theory that you can only write about what you know

    I really loved the imagery in this poem. I found it very rich, lovely and beautiful and it almost made me feel a bit melancholy that this year our winter is a warm one (as compared to last year where we had SO much snow, hip-high and relentlessly falling)...so I've seen a few winters and I am impressed that you managed to capture it so well!

    When I first looked at the poem I was expecting some kind of form because it is so nicely organised -- free verse with a tendency to form, thank you so much for that! I must admit that I'm really a sucker for poetry that is not only well written but also visually appealing...so this is another big pro here!

    My favourite line is line 5; nature dressed in white is such a beautiful and appropriate metaphor, I don't believe that anybody could find a better one.

    The only thing that didn't work out for me here is the line break between line and 11 and 12. Is there a reason why you left the "and" in line 11? I thought at first it might be an enjambement, but then you don't really need one here (and I don't believe it would add...just my personal opinion of course). Personally, I would put the "and" in line 12 so it doesn't interrupt the flow (as said, personal perception -- feel free to disagree!)

    In any way you penned a very beautiful poem here, brimming with rich and lovely imagery, creating a very vivid scene of a winter day! All the best in the contest!

    -Anna


    • gentle breeze
      January 3, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you very, very much Anna. You critiqued my poem like no one else has ever done before. Truth is that I hardly ever write about what I know. I find it easier to write otherwise. Thanks for your suggestion about lines 11 and 12. I fixed it because you were right-- "and" didn't belong where I put it. I'm glad you liked this poem so much. Thank you for reading and applauding.


  • wings of an angel
    December 31, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    This is a lovely poem you have penned here well done good luck in my contest


    • gentle breeze
      December 31, 2006
      Edit | Reply
      i don't know what happened but my pc was giving some trouble and even though you commented on my poem i couldn't find it in the contest so i re- entered it as a prewrite.

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