Early morning
it was about five,
we were still alive...
Sunbeamsly danced on the bed,
shameless beholding
the soft shadows on your face,
I saw your dream
(strawberries and cream)
the bed sheet just above your hips
to protect you (or to protect me?)
from the morning touch.
A silky ribbon to my wrist,
your breath staid,
I enjoyed the view.
A table with empty plates
a piece of cheese and ham under the cover
a vase with a bunch of flowers,
two apples, tangerine peels and a piece of carrot,
glasses with dried red wine spots,
I think it was Merlot.
I, barefoot, moving slowly,
my skin covered with your skin's cells
(could be good for DNA tests)
next to the window,
I was looking at the sea
inhaling the salt
and life
and you.
Then... your kiss on my neck,
my blushing cheeks,
showering together...
...after...
A light breakfast and talk,
a slow morning walk.
Your kiss on my lips.
Your tongue my conqueror
your fingers going up and down my hips.
You tried to count shells and boulders,
your hug around my shoulders,
the breeze in my hair,
the shine in my eyes,
the smile on your face
(remember the lace?).
Then downtown to shop
(remember where?)
for some new underwear...
Like twins
we said good morning to
the fisherman's boat
carrying its rich night's catch into the port.
Author notes
Painting: Amorante by Jaoni
This is for an anonymous contest
http://img01.picoodle.com/img/img01/4/1/8/f_love0by0m_30538af.jpg
In a list
A contest entry
- Friends of Free Verse invite your Free verse by Lyndon.
700 points, ended October 2, 2007, 15 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Picture prompts by Beauty Of Silence.
800 points, ended June 28, 15 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 29 of 29
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this is so nice...very delightful to read with amusing imageries...thank you for sharinf this romantic piece!
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I love love. Love is the best. What a beautiful poem.
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Thank you
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You made me smile, this is what it means to be together and in love. You have shown ordinary images of the home and people, which add up to a warm and touching tribute to life and living. Congratulations, this is a magnificent poem.
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Dear Sandal, your friendship and so great poetical support mean a world to me. Thank you.
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So worthy of gold~ loved this.
Congratulations!
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Thank you dear Rowan for your rare but precious visit to my site and for applauses.
~Sonja~
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Certainly erotic
and one does not need the picture to state that! However, you are able to make the sensual happiness a part of the ordinary world with some fine free verse descriptiveness:
"we said good morning to
the fisherman's boat
carrying its rich night's catch into the port"
and your reader knows the double entendre intentionally and cleverly used in the final six words!
This verse , too, is fine poetry in the context of a couple enjoying each other's bodies all night:
"A table with empty plates
a piece of cheese and ham under the cover
a vase with a bunch of flowers,
two apples, tangerine peels and a piece of carrot,
glasses with dried red wine spots,
I think it was Merlot."
A fine "come down" but truthfully so. We may feel gods and goddesses in times of passion but the kitchen does not vibrate to this ecstatic tune!
Well written piece of free verse. Thank you for entering, poet.
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Thank you very much for so nice and deep review. I am so glad that you found it enough interesting in spite of my style, so to speak, its complex differences, although it depends of temporary poetic mood.
~Sonja~
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This sounds like and reads like a wonderful love moment that is dreamy and full of emotions. You have an excellent grip on details and sharing the sensory perceptions.
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Thank you Zayra It's always nice to see your light on my site and comment so precious like this one.
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soothing
so intimate with details and gives the reader, me, a sense of calm and gentle soothing. beautiful descriptions and images and so full of love.
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Thank you Delrondu for visiting my site, for so nice comment and applause. The best way to express poets feelings is to find the way to readers heart. If you found sense of calm and gentle soothing than my mission is fullfiled.
~Sonja~
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there is someone at the receiving end of this poem who is probably smiling big while reading it, the one sharing those exquisite memories with you, sounds like reality anyway. there is the right amount of erotica, sensitivity, tenderness and life in this poem to make it a small piece of... masterpiece . good luck in your contest, my friend.
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What a comment goes with my first morning coffee...
I still can hear your applause echo ... please, show me the border between reality and reality and... just lost my thought.
I hope that this very special person will keep big smile.
~Sonja~
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OK Sis
I've always felt you were deserving of so much more and this shows you let go. So, in a haiku, I will comment...
You rolled from the sheets
and you fragrance of sea breeze
called forth love's inhale.
Mage Amazigh
Abdul Tawala Ibn Ali Alishtari
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Haiku comment? How great! What could be best
for the early morning than to take a rest...
to breath life and sea breaze to inhale
after the night... no more detail...
Thanks you for comment and applause,
till my next poem, little pause....
~Sonja~
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Sonja,
You have written clearly a sensual poetic piece yet with your class and sensibilities a modest yet knowledgeable poem. A perfect poem for debut and entry into this contest. You should do very well with this one. Lovely my beautiful friend.
Jim
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Thank you Jim. It is very hard to keep a balance between so many great poets on this site. I am always trying to do something new and refreshing. It depand of my muse.
~Sonja~
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I love how your poem is just filled with the warth and beauty of the morning. The picture is filled with a soft sensuous beauty that adds to the poem. You really did a great job writting this piece. I read the contest and they were asking for honest realism and you did it with your very nique style and the grace of a true poet. I know you will do very well in this contest.
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Thanks Ed for your precious comment. When I saw this picture it simply fits perfect with my thoughts and poem and I am glad that you think the same.
~Sonja~
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Excellent!
Dear Sonja;
I read this several times, more was gleaned with each reading. This is quite a unique perspective... the morning after! I love all the indicators that the nights passion was a wonderfully romantic experience, but nothing says romance as does the morning after. I've had such a shower, your inclusion of this intimacy adds so much to the encounter. Though bold, compared to your other beautiful works, you penned this very well. Again I am impressed by the scope of your talent. Lovely in every way.
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Thank you Sam for such a great comment and applause. This poem was writen for some special, poetic, romantic experiance. I am glad that you found it enough good to read it several times.
~Sonja~
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Very well done! Beautifully written and written with style and class! I wish you all the best in this contest!!!
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Thank you!
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JUST LIKE A DREAM!
This is so lovely Sonja!
Two people so into each other as they live each beautiful day.
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Just like contest title said: honest realism mixed with magical realism. And much more than a dream. Thank you for your time to comment my poetry.
~Sonja~
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This is certaintly different for you Sonja, yet you have pulled it off with a certain panache`
A perfect insight into the wonderful feelings experienced through the eye of someone who has tasted the fruits of love, the aftermath of having lain in the arms of the man you love and who loves you, both total in their abandonment of sweet, unadultrated passion. I have enjoyed the layout of this particular piece of writing, the alteration in font design holds the eye of your reader. This is extremely well written and a pleasure to read.
Well done!
~Katie~
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Thank you Katie. It's always nice to have your comments about my poetry, your honest words and great support from the very first day we met on AP.
~Sonja~
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