Come on baby, trip just a little closer
let me see a bit of you
just a little, a little bit more
I've got hands and eyes
that need to be all over you
You know, you're absolutely ravishing
so come on baby, come on and ravish me
I'll eat everything you'll give
and take everything else that's left
Just seeing you has made me oh so hungry
hunt you down, and plunder all the treasures kept
I've got one more night to fill
and one more empty day
I'll strip you down
and use you ragged
since it's so true that looks can kill
You know, I was hungry
and you never sated my thirst
So it's on to the next feast
on to another body
next please
it's well past your turn
Author notes
Lust has a mind of its own. And it wants yours to join in.
This brain holds its own sick little whore, always wanting something to see, something to taste, just a little more, another pretty face. Why is it that we can hide all our demons so well, and yet they still cling like ticks to the shadows of our hearts? Lust me baby, she said, and I sent all the world to hell.
A contest entry
- Seven Deadly Sins: Three Virteous Rounds by xxRainbowDawnxx.
300 points, ended January 5, 2007, 24 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Seven Deadly Sins Round 2: Lust and Wrath by xxRainbowDawnxx.
300 points, ended January 20, 2007, 9 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Crimson Carnage of Lethal Lust by DayDreamMuse.
1560 points, ended January 28, 2008, 8 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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Interesting view and form of the prompt. Your work has the emotional charge and the want for more physical contact and satisfaction, but for me it somehow goes a bit towards gluttony rather than lust with all the references towards hunger and with words like feast, thirst and eat. Still very good poem about inner demons.
~DD~ -
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Ahh, but that is lust, isn't it? As Merriam-Webster says, lust is,
"An intense or unbridled sexual desire
or, an intense longing"
So what better way to give image to an intense longing than a consuming hunger? There's not many other ways to give picture to it in a way that every human will identify.
-Thefallout -
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Oh I am not saying that it isn't right, because yes longing and hunger can overlap and its hunger for flesh, but I disagree that there can't be other ways to paint lust. Deepening inside the physical aspect is definitely possible as well.
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Very well portrayed... The lust that is kept within the walls of our society. This reminds me so much of many guys I know it's pretty damn scary, and therefore I applaud you for the scariness of this write. Thank you for sharing and kind of reminding me of how disgraceful some people are in this society that we live in. x Empathic x
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nice
Well, when I first started reading this, I thought you were writing about yourself. I am glad to see that you were not, and I do like it, now. Another great entry in the contest.
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