http://i123.photobucket.com/albums/o286/sandgoddess/AP%20Contest%20-%20Magritte/Homesickness1940-1941.jpg
Rene Magritte(1898-1865)
Homesickness 1940-1941
The depravation of home is unbearable yet I stand placidly
Driven by the thirst for assets and power
I keep hanging by the light posts in hopes they become stars
These stars in this place have not the luster I once had seen
Both in myself and in the sky looming above
Perhaps if I grew wings of hatred…
I could soar rapidly, far from the perils that drip with sin
As a boy I once had the vivaciousness of a lion
Now the bellowing roar in my youth has become subtle
A tamed cage circus lion violently taken from my natural habitat
Chained down by these paved melancholic concrete walkways
Streets that erode as the dawn of time fluidly flows
Much like the thoughts of where my heart lies
Abandoning everything for pennies worth…
Compared to the wealth of happiness
Still entrapped by one square with exhaustive flexibility
I have become another brainwashed human being
The answers lie in the city as they say
This slavery is a choice of my influenced free-will
Otherwise my pride would dwell within the country
Nature betrayed, peace destroyed, contemplative
Author notes
This poem was inspired by the artwork of Rene Magritte. The title of the piece is called "Homesick" 1940-1941. Magritte as a surreal artist is fascinating. I am glad to have discovered him through sandgodess.
Direct link to the piece here courtesy of sandgodess and photobucket
http://i123.photobucket.com/albums/o286/sandgoddess/AP%20Contest%20-%20Magritte/Homesickness1940-1941.jpg
A contest entry
- contest - Art Series 1: Rene Magritte - The Treachery of Images by sandgoddess.
900 points, ended January 21, 2007, 19 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Give me your honest opinion in consideration of the inspiration.
Comments
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truly touching
A very touching piece. I was genuinely moved. The approach to the painting here is very systematic – the writer looks at the painting and fishes “clues” to convey his own personal story, setting a situation and characteristics of the protagonist of this piece. All this serves as a personal, intimate, almost confession-like interpretation of the artwork.
The poem evokes a striking sense of painful loneliness and self-criticism. The element of past memories and present situations combine nicely. It may not be a Surrealistic poem, but it does employ symbolism, which is so essential in Surrealism, through the lion and the wings
‘of hatred’
or
‘I keep hanging by the light posts in hopes they become stars
These stars in this place have not the luster I once had seen
Both in myself and in the sky looming above’
A sentence that has really caught my attention is –
‘This slavery is a choice of my influenced free-will’
This is such a complex conception of the human condition – both painful and scorning; makes the reader think and leads to an association of the Existentialist Philosophy of Jean-Paul Sartre and others, who claimed that freedom is the utmost source of suffering of the modern man.
As for the poetic value of this piece – it could be improved. Some phrasing could be better formulated, as well as the structure, but I do like this piece.
Well done!
Good luck,
rachel
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2nd note to contestants
Well, I'm back. Sorry for the delay
and thank you for your patience. I will conclude all comments and the final judging within a week at the latest.
thank you
,
rachel -
Welcome to the contest and thank you for your entry. I will comment on it shortly.
Good luck,
rachel -
I've read this piece several times now, and sat and thought long and hard about it and your use and meaning of 'depravation'. I'm trying to decide whether you mean depravation or deprivation. Although having completely different meaning, both actually work just as well within the context of your words.
"Depravation" used here to mean the corruption and degeneration of morals, fits in with your images of a society based on greed and the blind striving for material wealth. But at the same time "Deprivation" could just as easily be substituted to illustrate the loss of a simpler life once lived, left behind, yet still yearned for.
The image of the lion in Magritte’s painting instantly reminds me of London’s Trafalgar Square and all that is so quintessentially ‘English’; the banks of the Thames and the street lights barely visible through the nineteenth century Victorian fog. Your use of ‘entrapped by one square’ brought this up to date and centred it in the present however. Being American I’m not sure if you are familiar with London’s Square Mile, the financial district of the capital. (Apologises for my ignorance of your knowledge if you do!) This consolidated the whole piece for me with your images of wealth for its own sake and reiterated ‘Abandoning everything for pennies worth’.
‘This slavery is chosen of my influenced free-will’ would possibly read more fluidly as “this slavery is a choice of my influenced free-will’.
I really enjoy poetry that at first glance seems very straight forward but actually gets the old grey matter working in the end!
Thank you for taking the time to stop by, read and review my piece for this contest, it is very much appreciated.
Kat
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