I'm never numb when awake
But I have a state of mind
In which I be
In state of being
And nothing but
So you see
As I'm here right now
Believe me
I'm Just sitting here
This bright screen
In front of me
This is my world
It makes me numb
To be in this world
I feel
Hear
And realize
Nothing in this world
From the real world
The only thing i feel
The letters benieth my fingertips
Life sucks
So I must escape
I feel nothing
When alone like this
This may seem
Sappy
Happy
Or sweet
But its the truth
And nothing but
I've become numb
To the pain that this world causes
By making for myself
Another world
Even though it was created by someone else
My world is
The internet
Author notes
if only it weren't true
Out of my life i spend about 78% of my free time a day online. Not on Myspace. But writing, thinking what to write. Escaping everything. Sad part of this, if there is one I litterally feel nothing and my eyes seem to glaze over in a blank stare due to not blinking.
Hope you enjoyed it, and it met your standards, I seem to always just barely be on the line of these types of contest.
But still I'll shut up. You have better things to do.
option 10 "Dear Amanda,"
In a list
A contest entry
- It Doesn't Matter, I Don't Care by Immer Leben.
450 points, ended January 2, 2007, 26 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - A cascade of magical options are flying in your face!!!!!! by AutumnsFlame.
415 points, ended June 27, 2007, 16 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Is this a wierd way to think of the internet?
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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Hah... I can relate to this... Your writing was not supirior, but it was alright. This part:
"Life sucks
So I must escape
I feel nothing
When alone like this"
I felt was extremely cliche. Overall, I think you should work on your imagery. Thank you for entering my contest and good luck. -
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even though you didn't like it. i'm thankful for your honesty. And actually, I have 3 poems where i'm screwing around with to practice nothing but imagry as that's my week point when it comes to writing poetry.
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I will not read your poem until you read the rules, sorry.
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i reread the rules, it doesn't break any rules. It came in before the new rule and changed it so that its not breaking it and its exactly 40 lines.
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Wow. I have to admit, I spend around 80% of my own free time on the internet, as well. The rest of the time, I'm watching TV, reading a book, writing, or singing, or talking to my family.
Not really what I was looking for, but the ending ties it all together. The title, "The Net" works really well, but the number 3 insted of an E is kind of confusing. But creative, nonetheless. Well written, and a great job. Thanks for entering my contest.
~Nyte~
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the 78% is more like 40 mins a day, and that's all i have pretty much.
And as for the 3=e, its a form of net speak.
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