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Automatonophobia

Lips too red, I swear your the living dead,

body to small compared to your head.

Eyes so large I know they are watching me,

no strings attached, so I know that your free.

I'll never put my hand behind your back,

I am not your sordid ventriloquist act.

Never turn my back on your evil being,

for all you do I need to be seeing.

Don't trust you I trust my enemy more,

your a being i've learned to abhore.

Burn you and stake you like they did witches,

so I nevermore have to look at your evil woven stiches.

Leave me alone you ventriloquist dummy,

some people think that you are funny,

but I know the real you, what you really do...

Your evil reincarnated, aren't you?

Author notes

Automatonophobia, fear of ventriloquist dummies, wax statues etc... Anything that is not alive but made to look as if it is.

This is a personal one... I HATE THE DAMN THINGS... urgh, they freak me out... Ehhh...


Bags Of Oranges Dont Cause Bruises

'--~.:.~--'
greatest fear
or one of.
'--~.:.~--'

In a list

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 28 of 28

  • kidwithgun silver member
    June 8
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    wow great use of words and visuals, you're very talented


  • Lady Michaella
    February 11
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    ooo! i love this!great job!

    -Lemon Bee-
    xx


  • Lucian Valcor
    November 8, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I like the poem it is to bad you didnt read the rules you really should pay more attention when entering a contest

    Lucian"


  • lowercase prelude gold member
    November 4, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    This was great. You did very well with your rhyme. And yeah, dummys can be really freaky


  • greenheart4
    July 27, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    wow. ok honestly haha i read the preview thing on this really quickly and i was like "MUST READ" haha
    its a very interesting write and i love the whole rhyme scheme
    just adds on that little fear flavor. i have a friend who has the same phobia. but also has a phobia of clowns.
    well this was an AMAZINGLY AWESOME write. keep up the radical work!!!


  • EvenStarsBreak--x
    July 20, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Great write =] *shiver* I hate those ventriloquist dummies too! You were able to write the fear of them very well. Congrats on your trophies. Thanks for the entry.


  • PonyPride
    January 2, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Wow

    Good write. I loved the rhyme and flow, gosh all you guys are great. I also liked how you broke things down into two and great work on the beggining and ending. You made me want to read the whole thing!


  • ShadowEyes
    October 27, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    This is pretty good. I like how you wrote it out... Thanks for your entry! Congrats on your bronze trophy!!!!! Keep up your amazing workz! good luck in my contest! Hope yo see more from you soon...

    Shadow


  • LadyDementia gold member
    October 27, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Cool!

    This is a cool write, reminds me of when I bought my daughter a clown on a swing and put it up in her room, boy did she freak! It is in my room now, and she has never got another clown. Superb description of a phobia. Best of luck in the contest!


  • ExpectingMommy18
    October 25, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    well i think its great what topic you chose to enter for this contest.my phobia is semi's and closed in spaces(closterphobia).i cant stand it.

    anyways enough with rambling,you did a great job with this peice.thank you for entering and good luck in the contest!!


  • leslielovesthomas
    October 23, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    i hate them too! i love this poem
    good luck!!!

    leslie

  • Astrotriz
    July 20, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I hate ventriloquist dummies, too! Ahh, you captured the fear very well with this. I don't think I'll be able to sleep now [read this at 2 a.m.] Very nice and congratulations on the trophy!


  • olly olly oxen free
    July 13, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    the first part has really grreat rythym.
    but like NinaRaz said, watch for grammer as it really takes away from this otherwise very good peice.

    thanks and good luck.


  • HerbalGoat
    July 13, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    I noticed that I have already commented on this piece, but you entered a contest that I as well did so decided to take another look.

    I think I found this to be a lot better this time around. Maybe it was my competitiveness the first time around that I did not like it so much. And I also hope you remember that you are not along here, that I as well hate the damn things.

    Before I mentioned that I did not like your couplets, but I believe it was written differently then or something because I like them. You describe something about the dummy and then follow up with sort of a "response" to that description; does that make sense?

    Either way, I enjoy this piece, so desregard any previous remarks on this piece, and good luck in the PIF-Phobias contest.

    Oh, I just wanted to point out one last thing. Watch your use of "your" and "you're." It is only in your fourth line that this problem occurs, but "... so I know that your free." should really be "... so I know that you are (or you're) free."


  • onesugar gold member
    June 22, 2007
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    I don't like them either they are so creepy.Loved your poem though.xonesugarx


  • brokenangel13
    June 22, 2007
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    Interesting fear. I didnt know there was an actual name to the fear. Great job!


  • Flightless Raven
    May 15, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    ^_^

    hmm... nice... reminds me of that movie that recently came out...uggg dollsss


  • Amunet Wolfbane Moderators member
    April 7, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    :)) Cute job on this. The rhyme is a little foreced in places, but overall it is a good piece. I wish you the best of luck.


  • -Ink Artist-
    March 27, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Very intriguing idea for a piece of poetry! This has an interesting tone and flow about it, lyrical almost. I agree with Suzi, your use of "your" should be "you're" as in "you are" but a quick edit will fix that issue. Compelling piece!


    ~Lori

  • Susan E. Pennycuff
    March 24, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    nice job, however I notice that you have only used the word "your" and I think you might want to rethink a couple of spots as I think the word you probably might have wished to use would have been you're. All in all I found this to be a very unique and interesting poem, unlike any I have read before. I enjoyed it very much. Thank you for sharing it with us.


  • bananasfoster42
    March 2, 2007
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    dude, i hate ventriliquist dummies too. thankd for entring


  • GuardianPhoenix7289
    February 1, 2007
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    Ahhh I see....

    Ah yes, I can understand this! And I like how you explained it! You did really well!!! Certainly used good skills with writing this and I applaud you for that! Truly awe inspiring! Nice topic! Good job and good luck!


  • HerbalGoat
    January 20, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Hello. I happened to come across your poem, and I actually have one about this phobia as well, since I'm another victim to automatonophobia. Your poem was good. Your opening stanza caught me like an opening stanza should, but your "body" stanzas didn't seem to have much focus onto why ventriliquist dummies scare you. You really just mentioned that you don't like them, and repeated this meaning over and over. Good luck in the numerous contests you have entered.


  • Norman Crabtree
    January 8, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    well thank you for introducing me to a new word.

    some really good lines here and it really got across a sense of fear about the dummies.

    however i would suggest to delve and explore your fears more, this didnt seem to come straight out of the hellmouth of the fearful soul. perhaps even a little wooden??

    the last stanza was a really strong ending.


  • Amaranth Dihdzere
    December 23, 2006
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    woah this was an exellent piece on fear.I am with you,I don't know if they have a name for this fear but I am afraid of live chickens cause when I was little I got chased by some.Thanks for entering my contest and I wish you the best of luck.


  • 0darkAngel0
    December 19, 2006
    Edit | Reply

    seriously???

    sorry about that...
    i know there's a cure for that (pardon me)
    but i also know that people are like that
    like me i hate reptile. like snakes and so on and so as spiders and yuck!!!
    ok thats enough

    nicely done
    great use of words
    keep it up
    thank you for sharing


    • xxRainbowDawnxx
      December 19, 2006
      Edit | Reply
      Why thank you very much... It is pretty awkward, i'll admit, but hey, you know there's no business like show business, like ho business... I don't know why I randomly said that, just felt like it Anyway thanks for commenting... You aint gettin me near a ventriloquist dummy, no way!! Have a good one!!!

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