Hold Still
And I promise this won’t hurt
One
Bit
Don’t move
I know that I can make you
Feel
Better
Sit down
I want to tell you how much
I
Hate
And spew these disgusting words
Out of such a pretty little mouth
Pretty little girl
Pretty shoes
Pretty hair
Pretty face
She’s pretty naïve, don’t you think?
She’s pretty fucked up
Is what I say
Don’t look at her
Don’t talk to her
Don’t say a
Single
Damn
Word
That pretty little thing isn’t worth your time
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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I love the way you've used enjambment, splitting up "one" and "bit", "feel" and "better", "I" and "hate, and "single", "damn", "word". Makes it sound as if the words are being spat out with venom, and emphasises each one...
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i really like the way you've played with the word pretty. pretty naive pretty fucked up, clever. i think in your list of pretty things (pretty little girl, pretty shoes pretty hair ect.) you should have pretty little, and not just pretty? it just works better in my head. interesting background
melxxx -
Brilliant.
This conjured up some very odd imagery in my head...Barbie bleeding on an operating table with the skin peeled back from her ribcage and no heart beneath the plastic bones, whimpering in pain, lipgloss smeared and eyes as dead as ever...
I truly loved this poem. I don't normally like this kind of stuff at all, but this really appealed to my squeamish love of pain poetry, and actually, my sense of humour, although it made me think of unwanted operations and rape. A very nonconsensual, bitter theme running here. I love the disgust for this rather pretty little girl.
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AWESOME
Gritty to the point poem. All that glitters is not gold is what springs to mind!
I feel the anger and hurt that come through this poem,keep up the good work and look forward to reading some more.
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