How can we keep torturing ourselves like this?
Everytime I strike for something, I miss.
All you'll ever be is the boy from my past,
And in a few days this feeling will have passed.
My new friend reminds me of you,
It's bringing up old wounds and feelings for you.
Even though I know, you'd only tell me I'm a fool,
I think you're wonderful...
How can I keep torturing myself like this?
Thinking of times I wish we'd of kissed.
I'm happy now, in my own way
But I'm still looking back today.
My new friends looks alot like you!
This isn't helping me to muddle through,
Guess I'm clinging to him in an awkward way,
Hopefully soon this will all go away.
How can I keep torturing everyone around me!?
It's not fair, not nice, but it's the way things have to be.
And you are beautiful and you are sweet.
But I know that you're no good for me.
And my new friend even talks like you!
I still want to be his friend, what else can I do?
But i'm torturing myself, cos that's what people do.
I wish my new friend was nothing like you...
Author notes
It's about missing someone you have loved in the past, but continuing to compare new people to that person! Meeting new people and thinking they are alike, and thinking back to what you had with the other people. And perhaps feeling you are making friends "similar" to old loves because you are clinging on...(Goat)
Also for the contest this is in, please don't judge me badly, becuase i don't write for the poem, i write something because its real to me, then enter it. SO it doesn't often fit your description well!
A contest entry
- ~~Show me true love~~ by RudolfTamer.
420 points, ended January 8, 2007, 60 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - For Love by live in love.
500 points, ended October 9, 2007, 54 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 14 of 14
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I could really relate to this one. The first time I ever fell in live, I was lied to and used. It took me a long time to move on, but when I did, it was with a man who reminded me of the one I had lost. In fact, that was the only reason I was attracted to him initially. Strangely enough, the new guy ended up hurting me even worse than the first. They were truly carved from the same mold.
You've taken a truth that is universal, and written it in a very real, relatable way. Well done.
One misspelling. It should be "Awkward" in the fourth stanza.
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The repetition of torturing works very well in this piece, emphasising the actions and emotion. It is an easy piece to relate to, particularly the pain and confusion, not to mention twinges of guilt.
Good write and congrats on silver.
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AHH!!
my ex-boyfriend camrin just broke up with me because i finally told him that he reminds me of THAT somone that is from my past and that somone hurt me soo horrably that i'm a little warry to get into a very deep relationship. this is also very nicely written and i adore it thank you for entering
good luck
lil -
You have created a piece of truth....
The emotion is expressed well, the feelings of sadness, to exceptance and moving on...
A well written poem, an exprience many of us have felt
good luck in the contest
thank you for sharing
Tracey -
very nice. I can relate to the bringing up of old wounds. It hurts soo much. However, heartbreak inspires great poetry as is the case here. Good job and good luck in your days.
~Kristen -
i know how that feels...way too much. i wish i didnt. i wish i was one of the happy shiny ppl who havent experienced shitt. as they say, ignorance truely is bliss. but, we cant take back the memories, but hopefully we can move on.
great write. keep it up.
!perplexed!
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This poem has a nice natural gentle flow. I definitely wasn't expecting all of the stuff between the first line and the ending statement. Your wording was excellent. I am glad I read it. Thanks for sharing. Keep up the great work. Best of wishes to you. good luck in all that you do....peace always in all ways. You rock....
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good
again, a very general poem. Good stanza arrangements and rhyme.
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fits too well...
I totally relate! Beautifully worded, I really love it. I understand completely, I'm in the same basic situation with a slight twist...the new friend IS the old one...we are friends again, still just friends, but closer now. And I still think back to what could have been, and will most likely never happen. We've changed. I don't know, reading this was like I wrote it. lol, I was there, one mind with the poem...I almost expected the twist at the end. Great job! Beautifully written, and I think that's a pretty natural thing to do, don't kick yourself for it too hard. Greatly heartfelt, the best kind of poem. Keep writing, you have such a talent for it! the poem is Amazing, it really is...
~ashira ladonai~ -
You successfully captured the feeling of moving on after an unrequited love. There are a couple of small technical problems. In line 15 the word is spelled awkward. In line 13 friend should be singular. And I thought the slang word "cos" in line should be eliminated. And it is probably my own bias but I don't care for ..... as in lines 8 & 24. The emotions you expressed were well defined and the last line was a definite winner.
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LOVED IT
totally relatable. if thats a word. lol
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aheartfelt work...
It is very heartfelt and very beautiful work interpreting of the heart which is full of love nd trying to get love with its original framework after its lose ...You have captured here very true feelings of this heart bringing its beauty and innocence through...The pace and the structure of this work is very slick and touching the depth of the universal essence here...A great work is here... -
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thanks for the comment, i like people who actually put something more than "good piece",etc. So thankyou for taking the time to put soemthing real.!
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Its bringing up old wounds - it's or it is
a good piece here, just that one point i mention above really. good luck in the contest. spill ink and twist me into the crazy shape of love...
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