The Darkest Dream
The ancient times
Our mystic rythmes
The way I see
The darkness in me
Following the darkest way
To be in the darkest day
The world has come to its end
You can never trust your friends
You will never find the light
You will always love the night
YOur heart turns cold
The ways are old
You can't follow your heart
I am left in the dark
The darkest dream
Will always seem
So real to me
A contest entry
- Round Contest!! Anything goes this first round. by FightOffYourDemons.
300 points, ended April 7, 2007, 47 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - ANY THING by serenity silvermoon.
430 points, ended May 10, 2007, 145 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
-
This poem has good flow even if that flow seems to take priority over the actual poem. I really did enjoy reading it. It was easy to read but i also found that I didn't really get it. Almost as if you sacrificed the actual poem so that it would rhyme and flow. Like to me the poem seems to jump subjects and such. Maybe it doesn't I could just nt be getting it.
Nikki -
This poem has a really nice ring to it. the rhyme works well, i especially love the line:
"The ancient times
Our mystic rhymes"
a great way to start the poem. good job and keep writing
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