I walk into the door, of the house that remains
I burden myself, to relive my worst fears
Challenging myself, to remove my belongings
I hear a cry, a moan, a shutter outside my window
Help me! Help me! I'm drowning!
I run out the door, to the nearest pond
I see the little girl, begging for a breath
I reach my hand out to her, she reaches back
And before I know it, she's evil, she throws me in
The house! The house! It's trying to kill me!
Swiftly running back into the house as fast as I can
Huffing and puffing, gasping for air
The air that had been knocked out of me
Why is this house so destined to off me?
Help me! Help me! I'm stuck in the wall!
Again I run, this time upstairs to the bedroom
There cries the same little girl, begging for help
She's trapped inside the walls of this house
I reach for her hand, and again, she tries to swallow me whole
The house! The house! It's trying to kill me!
Why is this little girl trying to hurt me so bad?
Why is this house wanting to kill me?
Where are my belongings that I came for to begin with?
And then I look into the mirror that sets beside the dresser
No! This can't be! I won't let it happen!
The little girl is the reflection in the mirror
She is lost, scared, and alone
This little girl, that lived in this house
That little girl
Is me!
© Chantelle Tessmer, All rights reserved
Author notes
Jayda Rayne
I have been having this re occuring nightmare ... it is of this house that I used to live in ... when my grandmother was still alive ... my grandmother died a few years ago ... and we had to put all of our stuff in storage and move ... for the house got sold ... I feel that the house is trying to kill me because I have not gotten over my past with it yet ... and the little girl, is me ... lost without the second mother that loved me so much ... my granny ... I lost all of my stuff in storage ... due to non payment ... and I am going back to try and get my stuff from the house ... it won't let me ... scariest dreams I have had in the longest time
A contest entry
- Fear Itself by glued-to.
450 points, ended July 2, 2007, 16 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - MILLIONS OF OPTIONS!!!! ALL AGES!!!! PLEASE GO IN PLEASE by Eternal-Jammy-Jam.
450 points, ended September 27, 2007, 12 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Realistic Dreams by Jocilynn Destroyed.
475 points, ended February 2, 2008, 12 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Living Dead Dolls (PIF CONTEST) by DarkenedAuras.
1750 points, ended January 29, 2008, 7 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Make Me Shiver by IFeedFromHisKiss.
942 points, ended January 31, 2008, 16 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Dark and Suspensful by God is my reality.
1400 points, ended February 23, 2008, 29 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - The Darkwrite Challenge (Season 6) by Ktulu Blackwolfe.
400 points, ended March 27, 22 entries
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Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 14 of 14
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A spooky write indeed. Sometimes the dreams and visions we have are the scariest.
Sorry this is so personal to you, but it did create one hell of a write.
**Ktulu Blackwolfe**
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Wow, it's a little far off, but very suspenseful. I love the ending. It is very unexpecting, but at the same time, not. Great job. I love the idea. It makes me wonder about things. It gives you a taste, and fulfills the need, but still, your mind kinda has to think. It gives the reader a picture, but lets them fill in the gaps. GREAT JOB
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Spooky write, very well penned, good luck in the contest with i
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Sounds like poems I make a lot
that's an eerie story especially being true (even if it's in a dream, it's still REAL to you) I agree with what Jocilynn Destroyed said
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damn
yeah this would freak me out...a lot...I would probably wake up either crying or pissing myself....or a mixture of the two. I love how this is written, very descriptive, very vivid, I felt like I was there. It painted a picture in my head...which is exactly what I was looking for. Good job and good luck in my contest.
Much love and respect,
Joci -
SSSSSSSCCCCCCCAAAAARRRRRRRRRYYYYYYY ARGH
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wow that does sound like a very thing to have on your mind all the time. i really like how creepy this poem is though - very good chanelling of your fear. very good. i don't think the repeption of the little one liners adds that much to it, sry it just makes it sound a bit cheesy to my way of thinking instead of adding dramatic effect - this is ironic because the rest of your poem is so amazing it feels like its forcing me to look at it and disecting my brain - a very interesting feeling. but i like the first one liner soo..anyways. excellent entry thank you and good luck
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What a horrible nightmare... That's what it is, not a dream... Yeah sometimes when we dream metaphorical images can occur... Sometimes we can find that we are the evil that we seem to 'fear' in our dreams. Very interesting and scary write here. I hope you don't get them anymore!!!
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wow anticapation ...bleak
What an excellent dream fear you have written here. I hope you get your stuff back and conquer your dreams. Good luck in the contest. You've sure written a winner. Dill- Oh! P.S. That little girl sure had me on the edge of my seat.
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oh!...going through the lines i felt suffocated....
very well written -
Oh wow, spooky and interesting! Thanks so much for entering and good luck in my contest! This was really well written! Thanks so much! My favourite lines were "Why is this little girl trying to hurt me so bad?
Why is this house wanting to kill me?
Where are my belongings that I came for to begin with?
And then I look into the mirror that sets beside the dresser
No! This can't be! I won't let it happen!
The little girl is the reflection in the mirror
She is lost, scared, and alone
This little girl, that lived in this house
That little girl
Is me!" Good luck and good job
!
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Vampiress this is so deeply touching, I can somewhat relate but in a different way, as I still dream of times in Grandma's house when younger, although she has been dearly departed for over 13 years now,so I know how emotional this must be, Bella
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I'm so sorry
I'm sorry that your having those nightmares and you shouldn't have to have them. I loved your piece though the way you desrcibed everything was just so real.
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wow
this is very very good. i love the imagery and how you used your past and nightmare to write a chilling poem.ver well written, and reat job
nekki
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