People smile while others cry
People in love, People in a lie
Which brings me the question of why?
Why can't all be happy, why
Why can't all love, why
Why does this world harm, why
Man why can't badness just all be a dream a lie
I have a friend she with this guy
They seemed good for each other the perfect tie
But now he doesn't treat her right always has her mad
Talkin bout he'll break her jaw this makes me sad
She's beautiful in and out probably the best he's ever had
Which is why the way he treating her makes me mad
He is supposed to be my friend, you know this guy
Which brings me the question of why?
Why can't all be happy, why
Why can't all love, why
Why does this world harm, why
Man why can't badness just all be a dream a lie
The other day I talked to this girl I know
Found out her dad was badmouthing her, calling her a hoe
She already has low self-esteem I try to help it grow
But he's killing it she wants to run away
But I told her no that wasn't the right way
She stayed home, suprisingly her eyes were dry
Which brings me the question of why?
Why can't all be happy, why
Why can't all love, why
Why does this world harm, why
Man why can't badness just all be a dream a lie
Why do men disrespect women, when they're our treasure
Some women have love for men that no one can measure
But women still get treated wrong, it's not right
If I could all those disrespectful ones I would fight
Maybe one day those men will see the light
But for now it hurts me to see these women cry
Which brings me the question of why?
Why can't all be happy, why
Why can't all love, why
Why does this world harm, why
Man why can't badness just all be a dream a lie
Now it is no just women we also have war
Men have developed great things, things that can soar
But they use it for bad, no to make everyone glad
Weapons of destruction it is so sad
Then they're are proffesional athletes, getting in brawls
They're suppose to be our models, ones we look up to one hundered feet tall
Adults even kids get shot everyday
From Sunday to Saturday
Not a day of peace, it hurts me badness is so high
Which brings me the question of why?
Why can't all be happy, why
Why can't all love why
Why does this world harm, why
Man why can't badness just all be a dream a lie
Author notes
All very true
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 29 of 29
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I fell in love with it because its so true. To tell you the truth Im at the stage where i can't trust men my dad abused me my uncle raped me my step dad calls me names and ive had guys use me for sex and treat me bad, this poem i hope one day will get thru to a guy out there. but i want to see more from you I really do love it. a few misspellings but hey this isn't english class.lol
Ashley -
Beautiful
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wow this is real real good it has so many tru things in it. why kant everyone jus B happy why there gotta B things dat jus fucK erthing up. oh well good poem.
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This was an eye opener..I loved it, so truthful, the only thing I see is "People smile well others cry"
should be while not well....but great job. good luck in the contest
XTashaX -
this had me in tears the entire time. my mom is not treated well by my father and these are basically the same questions i ask all the time. my best friend had a real jerk for a boyfriend and yet she contenued to love him.awesome write. thankyou so much for entering and best of luck in my contest. and thankyou for writting a very honest poem.
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hope your contest goes well
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While I applaud and ackowledge your concept, expecially as a survivor of abuse myself, I do have to suggest some serious polishing and corrections be made, This piece strongly deserves to shine, as it has a great base to it. I am not too keen on combining the last stanza, as it seems almost an afterthought in another direction. Most of the write was about physical abuse it kinda says, to me, oh yeah and here are a few more things i dont like. just a thought! Best of luck in this and all of your endeavors.
Hetohke'e * 
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I wish for a perfect world myself. But alas it is not to be so. Women do alot for men and men does not really care or should I say some men. In alot of ways this world sucks. From a women point of view men should treat women right. Cause it is all true that all things is born of women. Great poem you have written here.
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good job
I have to agree, Wow! The fact that you were able to maintain the easy flow and rhyme throughout the whole thing is amazing (I struggle with rhyme). That you were able to stay on track, make a point, and still relate something emotional important to not only you but everyone is a feat in itself, but add that to being able to do it in rhyme and good rhyme at that...that's awesome! -
wow
this is great... it must have been hard for you to wriit it...it would have been hard for me...keep up all the good work
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wow i absolutely love it good job on it i like it alot keep up the good work
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amazing. this is such a powerfull poem. it really tutches me because i had a bf who... lets just say he didnt treat me exacly right... aney way this is a verry verry powerfull peace of wrighting and it is so true... why cant everyone be happy why doest there haft to be pain... i wish that it would all go away. aneyway amazing poem. verry well done.
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Very well done. I like the thought behind the words.
thank you for your entry,
Best of luck!
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Wow, I'm crying right now. Since I was seven these things bothered me. It just seemed so wrong yet no one cared. Through those years of watching man do such things I've come to the conclusion that they do it becuase we are all simply human. I've told my best friend several times that humans just create more problems than they solve. I'm only twelve, so I don't understand why people do what they do. This piece has a lot of meaning. Not one lie in it. Many wonder the same thing. Why hurt. Maybe to them it seems right and it could be that they just don't care. I once asked my Mom if she saw someone being beat up would she help them. She said no it was none of her business, but then I asked her it were me being beat she said she would help me. Maybe people only care for themselves and the people they love. Some don't even care for the people they love. It's too much for me but maybe someone might figure out why. Maybe some day some one could come up with the answer and be able to fix it, if only but life doesn't work like that. Good luck on finding out why.
Kim -
It's wierd because grammar and spelling errors usually bother me a lot, but the further into this piece I got, the more they started to work for me in this...possibly just because you were so consistent with them, but also because this (I think) is supposed to be lyrics, and you can get away with a lot more in lyrics than straight poetry. I feel this is very heartfelt and sincere, and while some editing would still greatly improve the piece, I like the message a lot. Thanks so much for your entry and good luck in the contest.
Best wishes,
~J. -
i lovre this and its really true i love it because its not tring to hide whats really there great write!
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I love it but the flow and it needed some original metaphors in this.
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Wow this is a very inspirational and true poem great work
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100% true
This is very good, and so true, I felt as if someone much older had written it, it seems to me you have alot of wisdom for 15, and a insight on how things should be, and how to treat people. if more folks thought like that, this world would be a much happier place. thanks for sharing this, I really like it.
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This is a wonderful poem with a great message. The sad thing is that it's very true. A wonderful piece!
~Michaela~ -
Thats my question 2? I have a step dad that treats me that way and i had an ex that treated me like that to but i dumped the ex 4 that reason but i have to live w/ the way my step dad treats me! I like this poem very much i have to give you credit, i wish ppl could see this and make them change but it can't.
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great work
you have written alot in it which is full of true emotions
well it is true which you told
by
the poet of hearts and beautiful words
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fantastic
what a fantastic write and straight from the heart. well done. it is a very true peice and it crushes me to see it written down on paper what we all know but so few of us can put it into words. you are truely a remarkable poet. keep it coming i look forward to reading more of your work. take care and god blessx
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hey
thats very very well written keeep it up i like your style i will be back to read many more
Stars
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Very good piece!
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This has a great theme. Its great to know that there are guys like you out there. It is horrible that women get treated this way. I like the flow of this poem a lot but i think it would flow better if you added commas for ex:
Why can't all be happy, why?
Why can't all love, why?
Man, why can't badness just all be a dream, a lie
But thats just my opinion of course.
Keep blessing us with your writing
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Very Good
This is a great poem, and, sadly, all so true. I love the part:
Why do men disrespect women, when they're our treasure
Some women have love for men that no one can measure
But women still get treated wrong, it's not right
If I could all those disrespectful ones I would fight
Maybe one day those men will see the light
I'm glad that not all men are stupid and that at least some know a little about what women have to go through. Great write.
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Thanks
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The Idea is Very Heartfelt!
You've done a good job because the idea is from your heart and anything written from your heart is always good. However, almost every line few mistakes & forced rhym makes your idea wee bit confusing. I did go through the entire poem and corrected as follows, Please don't mind me:
People smile, well others cry
People in love, People (instead of in) live a lie
Which brings me the question of why?
Why can't (added) we all be happy, why?
Why can't (added) we all love, why?
Why does this world harm, why?
Man why can't badness just all be a dream, a lie?
I have a friend she’s with this guy
They seemed good for each other, the perfect tie
But now he doesn't treat her right always has her mad (do you mean he’s always mad at her?)
Talking about, he'll break her jaw; this makes me sad
She's beautiful in and out, probably the best he's ever had
Which is why the way he treats her makes me mad
He is supposed to be my friend, you know this guy
Which brings me back to the question of why?
Why can't we all be happy, why?
Why can't we all love, why?
Why does this world harm, why?
Man, why can't badness just all be a dream, a lie?
The other day I talked to this girl I know
Found out her dad was badmouthing her, calling her a (hoe – this means prepare, you perhaps meant… whore
She already has low self-esteem I try to help it grow
But he's killing it, she wants to run away
But I told her no that wasn't the right way
She stayed home, surprisingly her eyes were dry
Which brings me back to the question of why?
Why can't we all be happy, why?
Why can't we all love, why?
Why does this world harm, why?
Man, why can't badness just all be a dream, a lie?
Why do men disrespect women, when they're our treasure
Some women have love for men that no one can measure
But women still get treated wrong, it's not right
If I could get all those disrespectful ones, I would fight them
Maybe one day those men will see the light
But for now it hurts me to see these women cry
Which brings me back again to the question of why?
Why can't we all be happy, why?
Why can't we all love, why?
Why does this world harm, why?
Man, why can't badness just all be a dream, a lie?
Now, it is not just women, we also have war
Men have developed great things, things that can soar
But they use it for bad, not to make everyone glad
Weapons of destruction, it is so sad
Then there are professional athletes, getting in brawls
They're suppose to be our models, ones we look up to one hundred feet tall
Adults, even kids get shot everyday
From Sunday to Saturday
Not a day of peace, it hurts me as badness is so high
Which brings me back yet again to the question of why?
Why can't we all be happy, why?
Why can't we all love, why?
Why does this world harm, why?
Man, why can't badness just all be a dream, a lie?
Overall I applaud your effort and it shows your strong and beautiful character. Hats off to you to feel others' pain to the extent you do.
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