WHAT..?? Why you staring at me like that..?
what did you say?? You think that I'm fat??
Fuck off.. thats sad, go away you dont know me!!
How can you stand a chance.. I cannot even see?
Think my images describes me??
I have dreads, I'm not black..
so how can me being fat tell you who I am?
I eat because of who I have become,
The food makes the pain a little more numb..
Sad I know, but how can you understand?
I am what I am.. you don't have to like it?
I sure as hell dont, and I have too live this shit!
See these scars, yes the ones on my arm..
I made them you see, its called self harm..
I'm over that now.. I don't do that anymore,
I don't do drugs, been a long time since I scored,
But eating oh yes, thats how I abuse me,
why shouldn't I.. abusing me is free..
They all did you know, they all had a go..
Its my turn now.. abuse myself
make me ugly outside, so the me inside can hide..
I couldn't keep my body safe and that destroyed my soul..
But now there is no way in hell I will let that show.
You can judge me and think me a glutton ..
I dont care, you can stare you cant see my emotions.
There buried inside under a ton of fat..
Its ok, you dont care for beauty outside
I am the best I can be for all I've endured
And people who know me .. love me
and thats all I can care for until I am cured!!!!!
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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mmm. thought provoking, but bet many people do abuse their own bodies in different ways, be it any of the afore mentioned or more. People say fat people often comfort eat, a shame they cannot find the comfort elsewhere. Think thats where friendly sites like this ca come in taking the mind from some of the pain and making use of what tools we can instead. Great write, makes you think.
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1) "See these scars, yes the ones on my arm..
I made them you see, its called self harm.."
2) "abusing me is free.."
3) "I am the best I can be for all I've endured
And people who know me .. love me
and thats all I can care for until I am cured!!!!!"
1) These two lines are beautiful! It portrays such a strong image, suggesting you aren't as affected by them as maybe you should be... or were at least.
2) You know the contests that are sometimes run that ask for only a few words. This would be worth a Gold trophy, no bull.
3) I think the reason I love this piece so much is the fact that it shows such a strong image, you confront the abuse issues then say "hey! I'm ok now! So I eat for comfort, who doesn't?" and of course "More lovin' to go 'round"
Though it did take a little while to get into the flow of the piece, I loved it.
I do however believe that eating isn't the only form of abuse still present in your life
You put yourself down too much still. Big is Beautiful, it always has been. Back centuries ago, all the women were beautiful and busty, gorgeous curves and volumptious breasts.
I know it's what I prefer
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i can relate to this one alot too. i may not be a large girl, but have my own to carry and carry it for reasons you have mentioned here. thanks for sharing.
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wonderful.. life leads us to such awful places.
well written well done.
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Sweetie I totally understand what your saying. That is your way of dealing with the pain, we all have our own way dealing. But know that you don't have to continue to do that. You can stand up and say that you are somebody, that you don't have to be that person others make you out to be. I want you to be happy, and don't say you are when your not! If your hurting, fine, but don't hurt yourself more by burying your problems in food. I know you know there are other ways. (better ways)
Great way of telling how you feel. Nice poem.
HoneyFire!
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