My First Epiphany

Well, I suppose it was over before it was begun.
You didn’t want to ruin our regular fun.
But I could really care less, and I wonder why.
Other girls I know probably would’ve cried.

I analyzed my brain as best as I could,
And I had been doing something that I never should.
I was going to date you because I was alone.
I was more interested in having someone than you on your own.

The prospect of being in love once again,
It was overpowering, almost insane.
Even though I didn’t love you, or even like you that way,
I was hoping I’d have a guy who was there to stay.

I didn’t really care who, it just had to be a guy.
And that is the reason I didn’t cry.
The reason I didn’t cry because you just wanted to be friends.
The reason I didn’t cry because we never got to begin.

I’m obsessed with love, I’m too far gone
Off trying to find some long lost song.
The song that always rang in my ears
When I thought I was in love during these past years.

I miss being needed, I miss being loved.
I miss having a guy I could always hug.
Does this mean I’m destined to walk this land?
To walk without someone to hold my hand?

Will I ever find the right guy for me?
Or will I learn to live content and lonely?
But since it was over before it begun,
You’re just another guy on the list of “He’s not the one”.