A lifetimes worth of memories
of cookies that we baked.
A lifetimes worth of gentle hands
for tummies when they ached.
A lifetimes worth of Birthday cheer
for every year we aged.
A lifetimes worth of dressing up
for the childhood plays we staged.
A lifetimes worth of back to school
the pants, the shirts, the shoes.
A lifetimes worth of doctor bills
for every scrape and bruise
A lifetimes worth of it oks
when failure crosses our path.
A lifetimes worth of tutoring
so that we'd get through in math.
A lifetimes worth of great advice
for when we weren't sure.
A lifetimes worth of sleepless nights
while listening for the door.
A lifetimes worth of overtime
to pay for what we spent.
A lifetimes worth of teardrops dried,
for loves that came and went.
A lifetimes worth of hurt and pain
for tongues we did not hold.
A lifetimes worth of forgiving us
for lies we have told.
A lifetimes worth of smiles and hugs
for when our best fell short.
A lifetimes worth of I love you's
and always follow you heart.
A contest entry
- I Miss My Mommy by Assisted-Suicide.
375 points, ended December 5, 2006, 25 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Wanting AP Family by Heavenly Star.
450 points, ended March 21, 2007, 7 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - mothers day by honey bear.
600 points, ended March 13, 2007, 21 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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GREAT write, It was so real, and it also went with the song I was listening to;which made it even better to me at least. I could really relate to this piece.
I loved that you started every stanza with "a Lifetime worth" it gave it a little extra for me at least. I really liked this, it made me thinks of my past memories, the good and the bad. Again great write!!
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thank you for entering and good luck in the contest with this very wonderful, love filled dedication, exelent work!
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wow it is sooooooooo sweet and full of love! i love it sooooo much!
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This is a great poem, I love how you start each stanza with "a life of". Your rhythm was right on tact and your rhyme flowed superbly. Well done dear poet and good luck in my contest
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wow, great flow. it felt like a solom poem but kinda like a dedication. It was very moving. I love the part that said, "A lifetimes worth of it oks
when failure crosses our path.
A lifetimes worth of tutoring
so that we'd get through in math." because it related a lot to what my mother had to do with me. Loved it! Great poem, keep writing. -
Amazing poems here is just a few suggestions:
Line 17. I think the 'in' should be left out.
Line 29. Maybe for lies that we have told. Just to make the flow a little better.
The ending sounds a little bit forced. Maybe exclude the last staza. But other that that this is a wonderful poem. The rhyme was amazing, and the flow was very good, it just had a few rought spots. Great job and good luck!
~ Princess Padge
Happy Holidays!
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Good write. A lifetime of anything is worth more than nothing. Good luck.
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