The asphalt was bare,
fresh and unmarked.
He slept beside me
as I drove to Enya.
Then headlights came
at us.
They were too close.
I swerved.
Loose gravel
spun my tires
as they futily
grasped for traction.
We swerved
Out of control
and into the ditch.
We glided,
Trunk over hood
and the roof bounced
off of a telephone pole.
The car finally rested
after the impact,
the roof
completely crushed.
My lack of height
saved my neck,
his fatigue
saved his.
We emerged
from the twisted heap
badly shaken
but barely scathed.
Author notes
This poem is written in response to a poem by grannyeri. The inspiration can be found at
http://allpoetry.com/poem/2329900
I chose option #3.
A contest entry
- Echoes and Reflections by DK akaLunaticSerene.
700 points, ended January 12, 2007, 19 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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Lucky break!
Wow, you guys got really lucky! The connection to the inspiration piece is obvious! lol. It felt like this was a cathartic write for you. I am breathing a sigh of relief, as I am sure you did too! Good job and good luck!
xxoo
dk
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Pleased that you used my poem Sudden Impact as an inspiration for this poem you have written for this contest. Accidents happen so quickly and sometimes are over before one even knows- I have no memory of mine - just the before and the waking up in the hospital. Liked the flow of this poem, and the brevity of the lines - makes the story go by quickly and it is easy to read and understand. Liked your poem.
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This is a great poem. It kept me enthralled, which is more then I can say for some of the poems. Keep up the great work =]
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THis is really sad, it leaves a lasting impression on you even after you are done reading, its great. im basically speechless. keep up the good work <3
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Telling...
I was in a car accident once and though it was not as bad, I understand the shaking that comes with it. Its got a quick rythme to it that makes you want to know what happened like a novel.
*~* Mad Hatter Felix
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