My heart's racing and the heart's pounding
Craving for more while she's surrounding me
Breathing her in the way that I deeply desire
that will make this soul rage in total fire
Uncontrollably I'll shiver awaiting her touch
Desiring a part of her I've going to caress
Gently grasping me and taking my soul within
Making me excited and she'll understand the rest
Oh yes I have a special way of breathing her in
Only she has a way to make me feel this way
Breathing her in gives this man a new feeling
for the passion I have here grows with each day
Excitement and pure pleasure...now it shows its bloom
How my emotions run wild with the way she loves me
Within the core of her soul I'll rest upon her chest
Looking deeply into her eyes in a way nobody else can see
Yes...this is going to be a night of passion baby
Now as she wraps herself around me here tonight
Breathing her in awakens each one of my senses
That scent of love captures more than sweet delight
David
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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This speaks of love as well as desire and the promises that will be fulfilled by both. May I suggest that maybe you change "everyone of my senses" to "each one of my senses. I do not know exactly why, but for some reason that seems to read easier. But it could just as well be only me
. I wish you the best in this contest,
reenie
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David, you definitely have a way with expression. There is much passion in this, and it stirs the soul for sure. Good job.
Thanks for entering and good luck
Storm


