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Moving Out With A Ute

Missing image
~by Gregg Rowe

One day soon
he'll tell her
it's time to start packing,
and the kids will yell
"Truly?"
and get wildy excited
for no reason,
and the brown kelpie pup
will start dashing about,
tripping up everyone,
and she'll go out to
the vegetable-patch and
pick all the green tomatoes
from the vines,
and notice how the oldest girl
is close to tears
because she was happy
here,
and how the youngest girl
is beaming
because she wasn't.

And the first thing
she will put
on the trailer
will be the bottling-set
she never unpacked from Grovedale,
and when the loaded ute
bumps down the drive
past the blackberry-canes
with their last shrivelled fruit,
she won't even ask why
they're leaving this time,
or where they're heading for –
she'll only remember how,
when they came here
she held out her hand
bright with berries,
the first of the season,
and said:
"Make a wish, Tom, make a wish."

Author notes

["ute" is a well-known colloquialism throughout Australasia. It is derived from "utility vehicle", a term that is now pompous. 'Utes' are used on farms especially for carrying goods and passengers for small scale personal use. The ute is usually quite affordable after a few years of use. A family during the Great Depression could easily have used a ute for a one-shift move to a fresh location.]


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1 - 11 of 11

  • Lyndon gold member
    December 13, 2006

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    I preferred this poem not centered

    but that is a matter of taste. You did preserve the situational story and the poignancy of this poem; for poem it is in spite of our friend Hugh's remark. A closer look at the prtonoun "she" would enable you to arrange verse paragrphs to avoid ambiguity. I set this contest because I wanted to test this problem.
    Thank you for a fine attempt. Lyndon of the Winklings.


  • hugh wyles silver member
    November 30, 2006

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    Moving on.

    Dear Gregg,
    As you know, buddy, I don't comment on contest poems but (1) this is more of a story than a poem, being in free verse (2) I can't resist complimenting you on the simplicity of language and imagery which gives the telling its impact and (3) because it's YOU I feel I should be allowed an exception to the rule.
    Congratulations for a great write.
    Love, Hugh.
    PS: Thanks to Joan for directing me to this entry.


  • Cannonsfire
    November 29, 2006

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    So Aussie

    Loved it and the classic ute poem is so Aussie that it brings back memories of camping in one many years ago. I loved the Aussie symbolism in this and it was a great read.


  • catz Moderators member
    November 29, 2006

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    I like !!

    I like poems about life and this held my interest throughout, it's truly a good one, Gregg. Sometimes I feel a bit sad that the young people today missed out on these simpler aspects of life.

    A nice story

    love and
    Dee


  • cutiepie gold member
    November 29, 2006

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    Excellent

    As always, with your writing, it held me to the final word. The images you paint with words are so real you can almost taste and smell the green tomatoes...Moving home can be so disturbing for some and not others, as you show so clearly in this poem...many of us can relate to the insecurity of such a move, and having moved, forgotten just how things were before. I enjoyed this very much and as said before, it is lovely to see you posting again


  • Girl With Guitar silver member
    November 29, 2006
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    you have utes in canada?


    • lordoftherings gold member
      November 29, 2006
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      No We Don't Have Utes In Canada

      We have ski-doos! They are faster than Utes *laugh* I wrote this for two friends of mine: Joan and Hugh and they both would know through my poetry what I mean by the underlining message. But you hit the nail on the knob when you asked me your question!

      gregg


  • pomegranate76
    November 29, 2006
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    your love for the woman in this poem is palpable. i want to paint this poem. it's truly beautiful


  • Fridays Child
    November 28, 2006

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    This reminds a bit of a poem by Galway Kinnell called "Blackberry Picking" or something like that... something about blackberries anyway.. The language is simple, which gives the piece a sort of "country-home" feeling, and I like that. I especially loved the image of the woman picking all the green tomatoes, almost as if she's trying to save some part of that home to take it with her. There's something oddly tristful about this piece, it's rather like one, long, quiet sigh. It's simple, and yet, as with all your work, it's incredibly amazing. I love it! Never give in, Annandhel.


  • angelica silver member
    November 25, 2006
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    Very poignant poem

    Dear Gregg, Yes it's true, we do call them utes here in Australia and it would be ideal for drifting from place to place, some have even used the back to sleep in when they're down it their luck. A very poignant poem my dear Brother and good to see you writing again. Good luck in the contest.

    • lordoftherings gold member
      November 29, 2006

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      Joan

      Je besoin un(e) utes maintainent pour allée ma vie!

      I need a utes now to continue my life!

      Gregg *hug *

1 - 11 of 11