Last night I tried
to take a ride
upon my boyfriends lap
I pulled down his fly
heard him sigh
took off his baseball cap
We were driving far
in his new car
so this was quite a feat
I wrapped sweet lips
(as we hit the dips)
round his swollen meat
As the car got jarred
He got real hard
and I climbed upon his rod
Up and down
as he drove around
I heard him moan; oh god.
Then he closed his eyes
As I made my cries
into the watching sky
He hit a ditch
(ain’t this a bitch)
I thought lust made me fly
Thru the air
I died with flare
Bare assed upon the ground
But I was clenching tight
and to my delight
his manhood can’t be found.
Patricia Gibson-Little
Author notes
A poem written from the grave... I liked this challange.
Written May 6th, 2003
In a list
A contest entry
- one of the unavoidable things...in life? by .
271 points, ended May 22, 2003, 57 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 19 of 19
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Hahaha....Danna H had the same thoughts I did....There are definitely "men" jokes and "women" jokes/poems/stories...and this is classic! Men are thinking OUCH, and women are holding their sides laughing! Wonderful way to start my morning - with a good laugh.
m -
This is great! I love the humor although it was a painful ending for both. I suppose there is a moral here somewhere. The rhyme scheme used in this poem is one of my favorites. It reminds me of some of the poems by Robert Service, like the Cremation of Sam McGee. Thanks for posting this, I enjoyed it!
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hehe I liked that, kind of dark humor. It was very cute, made me laugh. Hehe, that would hafta hurt for the guy definitely, and that would suck to die bare assed upon the ground for all to see you naked...but at least you died happy and not horny, right? hehehehehe. Cute...nicely written, keep up the good work :-)
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OMFGLMAO!!! that was so funny...ouch i think ima let all my guy friends read this!! damn that was so great!
_blood -
that's hilarious!!
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ROTFLMAO this is too funny, and too good. What a way to go!
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This is absolutely umm?.. ..if you have to go, well.. lol why not... ??
Good luck in the great beyond... oh the contest I mean..!!
Edited on May 08, 8:06 because ''. -
*laughs her arse off*
man i couldnt stop laughing
especially this
*Thru the air
I died with flare
Bare assed upon the ground*
really horny *teeheehee* (like me!)
and dont change the last verse
its perfect for the poem
poems are always right!! lol
great job on this one!!! =) -
Thank you everyone. I don't do a lot of humor, (except for in the last few days) but this one well it popped into my head as soon as I started thinking someone needs to do a funny one. When I started it I didn't know how it was going to end, but you know poems they have their own ideas about how they want to be written.
And I kept his manhood with me… hell if the damn man can’t drive any better then that he doesn’t deserve it. LOL I’m glad everyone enjoyed it. I really wasn’t sure about that last verse… but the poem wouldn’t let me change it, no matter how hard I tried
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AUWch indeed.......I just hope the guy died before the u know.... Else it aint a nice death at all lol.
BUt yeah I really liked it and ill read it again (Ill just forget to read the last stanza then
)
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LMAO... all the men are having the same reaction to this one, and all the women are snickering! Love it!
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Oh my God, this is so funny! I have a mental picture of folks looking for that missing part. This kills me! Good luck, this entry is brilliant
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high ^5
I would think it is likely his 'manhood' ended up where you did. If I may be so 'frank' about it, given your description.
I bookmarked this, Angel; a pungent and unflinching exposition you have created here. I vote for you, until I get mine in! >grins with raucous applause
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Laughing!!!
Angel you should do a sequel to this one, Lol
...raw meat of endless days past
...by the suns rays, I found you at last
...swollen you were, tho not from sexual bliss
...hanging on the guardrail above the ditch!! Ouchies
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OUCH! THAT HURT!
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OUCH... thats gotta suck, especially if he survived =)
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well sence I am not a man I really don't know what to say about it
But i think my husband will need a cold bath that for sure lol
but I guess i have to by your other poem so that means that it ias a GREAT WRITE thank you for shareing it -
Omgosh! Well, that certainly got a giggle out of me. I'll try not to imagine what freud would have thought of that one. Then again, I'm sure a simple blush and "well done" would suffice. Well done. Glad to see you Rose to the challenge... I'm not sure his manhood can say the same... lol
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LOL ouches...
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