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Satan's Embrace (Pantoum)

Satan's Embrace



Bodies on fire in the wick of the dance,
Serpentine shivers, loud cracking of whips;
Blistering thunder; lost in Passion's trance,
Sanguine and lusty, wild succulent lips.

Serpentine shivers, loud cracking of whips,
Skin throbbing; pulsating rhythms begin;
Sanguine and lusty, wild succulent lips,
Moist velvet petals rippling pink within.

Skin throbbing; pulsating rhythms begin,
Striding and gliding like leaves sail the wind;
Moist velvet petals rippling pink within,
Spread wide apart, like a butterfly pinned.

Striding and gliding like leaves sail the wind,
Moon hides her face 'neath night's satin grace;
Spread wide apart, like a butterfly pinned,
With Satan's embrace, Love's fingerprint to trace.

Moon hides her face, 'neath night's satin grace,
Sequins of starlight, her mystical crown;
With Satan's embrace: Love's fingerprint to trace,
His fervor engulfs them; His magick's renown.

Sequins of starlight, her mystical crown,
Purple grows flushed in the glow of night's blush;
His fervor engulfs them; His magick's renown,
Floodgates fly open, as waves crash, and rush.

Purple grows flushed in the glow of night's blush,
Blistering thunder; lost in Passion's trance;
Floodgates fly open as waves crash and gush,
Bodies on fire, in the lick of the dance.

Author notes

l i q u i d m i n d f o r e v e r

Favorite Villan:"whatever"=Satan


LOOK INTO MY EYES #4 BY LIQUIDMINDFOREVER

Crew or Homies: AP "Heart-Connector" Option #4


"Phantom of Despair"


liquidmindforever


"Let's fuck up and go down in history like we did something important!"


Lines 2 and 4 become lines 1 and 3 as the verses progress until the final verse where Line 1 and Line 4 of the first Stanza are used in reverse.

Hope this finds the "stone" ; It's fresh from the Sorcerer's oven.
Written November 9th, 2006

A contest entry

What did you think

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    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
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Comments

1 - 37 of 37
  • This is a very powerful poem and I enjoyed it greatly.It flows wonderfully and you truly drew me in.Good luck in the contest.

  • Baldwin
    May 15

    Edit | Reply
    i've never seen this style before and i like it. It feels like a trance, as you put it "Pulsating Rhythm". They say that it is a Hell of the senses, i believe you conveyed that very well here.

    Thank you for the read

    • Thank you Baldwin for stopping in to read SATAN'S EMBRACE; appreciate
      your comments and those snappy, clappy faces.
      Blessings,
      liquid


  • icyrose
    May 15
    Edit | Reply
    Lucky for you, this was very much what I was looking for. A poetic view of 'Satan', more as an exciting, inebriating character than an evil one. The imagery is great, the flow also...your choice of Pantoum is also an interesting one, and I like what it does for the mood of the piece..almost an obsessive, mellifluous tone.

    Altogether, well done.


  • ennovy silver member
    April 15

    Edit | Reply
    Pantoum is lovely form of poetry...you write it very well...This also a heated piece of sensaulity
    Thank you for entering our contest...novy & brazos


  • Catacomb
    April 11
    Edit | Reply
    Wow. Amazing imagery!! Thank you so much for entering. Goodluck.


  • Nam
    April 10

    Edit | Reply
    I feel this would be better read if it was left-aligned. Other than that: a nice poem that you have written here.

    -Nam


  • l33t-n1nj4
    August 23, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Holy crap. I love the way you wrote this with the enterchanging of lines as the stanzas progress. It is eye catching and thought provoking. good job


  • TheDemonEve
    March 24, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    WOW

    Oh, my. I don't think I could have asked for a more fitting or talented piece for this contest. I especially loved the lines
    "Moist velvet petals rippling pink within,
    Spread wide apart, like a butterfly pinned."
    The best part about this piece is that it is erotic, but with an elegance found in few other erotic pieces. Lovely work!!!

    Best of luck and thanks for entering!!


  • danceswsquirrels
    November 14, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    hey! thanks so much for entering! And I'll comment more after the contest closes, but Can you please specify what position in my ap family, homies, or ppdpp you are going for? thanks so much again!


  • Megan Awesome
    October 25, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    This is really good lol. I love this. The occasional rhyme was nice. But the WHOLE poem was amazing. Wonderful job. Thank you for entering my contest and good luck!!!
    Megan


  • Alastair
    October 18, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    Good!

    I like it. It's very dark and I defintely could see it. We know who's side you fight for.


  • XInsanity-FairX
    October 18, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    this was absolutely amazing
    it flowed so well
    it was practically flawless
    and it made me tingle
    it was a very well written poem
    and you have alot of talent
    thanks for entering and good luck
    xxxxx


    • liquidmindforever gold member
      October 29, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you friend for hosting this contest,for the emerald trophy and points.
      lovelightpeace
      liquid


  • Sonja
    October 16, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Oh my, oh my...I had to read it several times to be sure what I read. Absolutely, strong and dark and all wrapped in the beautiful very complexed pantoum frame and rhyme.
    ~Sonja~

    • liquidmindforever gold member
      October 16, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Sonja darling,
      Thank you for stopping in to read SATAN'S
      EMBRACE and for your powerful comments
      and happy faces. Appreciate your appreciation.
      LOVELIGHTPEACE
      liquid


  • Coco Mara
    October 15, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    This is amazing! Oh my gosh, I love this its sexy, dark and imaginative. Thank you for entering this
    I think that you used wonderful imagry and I could see it more, like it was sexy, but there was something else about it. I dont know how ti explain it really.

    • liquidmindforever gold member
      October 23, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you for honoring SATAN'S EMBRACE
      with the GOLD TROPHY. Thank you for hosting this contest and for the points.
      LOVELIGHTPEACE
      liquid


  • Edna Sweetlove
    October 8, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    What I DO find offensive is entering the same poem into 7 or 8 contests at once in the hope it will win at least one. It may do so, but not mine!

    Having said that, there is nothing offensive in it whatsoever.

  • Virgoan
    October 4, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Beautiful rhyme scheme rendered and very much felt.

    Final score - 8.6

    Thanks for sharing

    VIRGOAN


  • xxRainbowDawnxx
    September 30, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I loved the repetition in this piece. I also loved the way you can almost hear the whips going and the heat of hell enveloping you. I really like the harsh plosives as well, they really hit you hard.

  • Virgoan
    September 27, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    "Blistering thunder; lost in Passion's trance,
    Sanguine and lusty, wild succulent lips" - sensual yet bleeding lines. I like it.

    This is my first time to read this poem. I will be re-reading all the entries like I usually do.

    Initial score = 8.5

    Thanks for sharing and keep on writing my friend.

    VIRGOAN


  • gypsyfan
    September 27, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I loved this from one rhyming poet to another. I also loved the subject matter, wording, and feelings that it conjured up. Good luck in the contest, this was a very talented write...keep it up...


  • LadyDementia gold member
    September 24, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Fab! Good luck!

    • liquidmindforever gold member
      September 24, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Dear Pinktat
      Thank you. Glad you liked "Satan's Embrace"
      sure was a chilly thrill to write..
      Hoots and whistles,
      liquid


  • misticmoonlite gold member
    September 23, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    wow this is so deep in context, nice,but ugly scenes come to mind, you have talent for this poetry,good luck...MM


  • Tangled Angle
    September 18, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Nice work.


  • crystallynnbradford
    September 18, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    very interestn write

  • tigress3737
    September 8, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Beautiful wording here, a very rich and vivid poem


  • adsaige
    September 8, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Wow

    Honestly...I've never seen pantoum described in a erotic fashion, and I must say i rather enjoy it...it has me wondering what else you have up your sleeves...*grins*

    FINALIST'S LIST WITHOUT A DOUBT.


  • ma belle
    March 12, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    I am not accustomed to reading an Erotica Pantoum but you take the cake with this one. Exquisite, exciting, enchanting! Just loved it to pieces. I have been missing my 'form friend.' Trust you are well; do visit me when you can. ♥ Belle

    • liquidmindforever gold member
      March 21, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Dear Belle,
      Lovely to "hear" from you once again.
      All is well. I recently won a cash award
      for one of my poems that I submitted to
      Silver Wings in California--a sonnet.
      Have been taking care of health issues.

      Hope your family is well and you also.
      Thank you for the praise on "Satan's Embrace."

      Love and blessings,
      liquid

      • ma belle
        March 21, 2007
        Edit | Reply
        Congratulations! Please send me the poem via a link--would love to share in your joy. God bless dear one, ♥

  • liquidmindforever gold member
    November 11, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    Thanks "little" bro for stopping by and reading SATAN'S EMBRACE. I appreciate your feedback and time, and critique when you have it to offer.
    Poetically yours,
    liquid


  • Words Die On Lips
    November 10, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    Sis,

    while I'm not going to lie and say that I know what the hell this format is {Pantaloon wha???}, this work is nothing less than astounding, making me purr-arousal .

    I cannot comment on the form because it is one that I am unfamiliar with, so I couldn't say if it was done wrong or right. However, as usual, your ability for form a picture with the written word never ceases to amaze me.

    Serpentine shivers, loud cracking of whips,
    Skin throbbing; pulsating rhythms begin;
    Sanguine and lusty, wild succulent lips,
    Moist velvet petals rippling pink within.

    Skin throbbing; pulsating rhythms begin,
    Striding and gliding like leaves sail the wind;
    Moist velvet petals rippling pink within,
    Spread wide apart, like a butterfly pinned.

    Jesus, you could practically see the flesh melting and intertwining in "Satan's Embrace". I seriously need to take a page from your playbook in terms of involving more of the senses when it comes to my own writing. Once again sis, you truly are an inspiration. Best of luck in this contest, it's a winner in my eyes!

    Yours In Ink~

    Sinz

  • liquidmindforever gold member
    November 10, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    Dear Chris,
    Appreciate your overview on SATAN'S EMBRACE. Hope you reap the harvest of beauty and uniqueness in your contest, for which you
    hunger.
    Blessings,
    liquid


  • Envelope
    November 9, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    i loved this metaphor...and more importantly i loved the flow...it propelled me forward rather than me pushing on myself, at first i thought i might find it a bit repititous, but while reading it every stanza feels fresh and different...one of the most unique works i have read that is for damn sure.

1 - 37 of 37