Opening my heart
would result in closing my eyes
I have tried
been denied
cried
for some spiritual awakening that would take my aching
for the
denial to subside
I have never heard that voice,
never felt a calm except in Love's eyes
and is that Him?
To just release all fears and forget about all the years
of pushing and pulling
this game of tug-of-war
loosing
all faith
for the "All moving"
And I cannot base my life on a superficial feeling
a belief that what I do
is because of a spirit I cannot see?
then leaving me stripped of any faith I have....
in me...
Author notes
option 6
Written November 6th, 2006
A contest entry
- I Want You To Disagree With Me!!! ...DEBATE! (CONTEST) by RealEyezRealize.
300 points, ended November 15, 2006, 14 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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Potent
'to just release all fears and forget about all the years' - I love this line not only because is sounds so wonderful aloud, and flows so beautifully, but also because I can relate whole-heartedly with what your saying. Also I felt that the first stanza was very strong, 'I have tried/ been denied/ cried' I'm a sucker for clever word combinations, this was like candy for me. Really well done, I loved it!
Best to you,
Crestfallen
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Moving
A common feeling but never feels common. Confusing subject then simple for some people. No matter what the issue It is your's to see it through. Important thing is to Always know that You have been forgiven and A life was given to set that promise into affect. Beautiful write and emotionaly captures me as a reader. Reminds me of the many time I was where you are. Sincerely, Don
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Great work
You certainly scored with this poem! Not a lot of unecessary stuff to clog the drain... almost simplistic...yet with great heart and sound reasoning.
I thoroughly enjoyed this and am glad to have found your writing.
hugs WolfHeart
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YOU ROCK BUT YOU ALREADY KNOW THAT THIS IS AN AMAZING POEM AND I KNOW WHY YOU CHOOSE NOT TO BELEIVE BECAUSE IT IS A CHOICE, BUT I STILL PRAY THAT ONE DAY YOU FEEL THE LORDS POWER AND REMEMBER HE IS WAITING FOR YOU...WRITE ON ROCK ON READ ON!!!!!!!!!
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Awesome poem I so enjoyed reading it. Keep up the wonderful writing
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that was awesome thank you so much for entering im leaving two commetns on all poems now and during jdugment awesome write and again thanks for entering .........WRITE ON ROCK ON READ ON!
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I just had to go back to the Contest Page to find out which option this may have been written of following my reading of your poem, Chauna. It just felt so much deeper and more relevant to me than anything written of "love" or a relationship.
You really wrote your "opinion" of God and belief in this poem so eloquently. It's not a poem which argues or outlandishly states your case, but lets a reader see and sense your opinion for themselves, and if a poem can do that on a religious or political level, it's achieved what is poetry's intention. It may not be to agree or disagree, but to allow a reader to see and sense what you are conveying.
Really good writing, and best wishes to you in the contest!
Jo
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