Autumn dreams of sunny days,
Bring winds brisk and cold,
Glowing fingers, glowing face,
Leaves orange, red and gold.
Autumn dreams of skies so clear,
Frost crunching underfoot,
Swallows curving against the blue,
Wings as black as soot.
Autumn dreams of breath in smoke
A dragon in disguise,
Roaring fires in the hearth,
Sparkles in the skies.
Autumn dreams of velvet black,
Where stars stand out like gems,
The moon, a silver shrinking crescent,
Soon to be back again.
Yet dreams of autumn come and go,
Never quite what you expected,
The time drags on, and by the end,
You feel thoroughly dejected.
Skies of grey cloak everything,
To horizon and beyond,
The cold spreads through you steadily,
Like ice across a pond.
Leaves to brown from summer green,
No orange, gold or red,
Trampled into the mud below
Crumpled, blackened, dead.
Cruel gales nip, and bite your skin,
Grey birds in a grey sky,
The robin sleeping somewhere cold,
Too depressed to even cry.
Eyes water as gales swirl into them,
Lips blue, mood bluer still,
Retreating further into your coat,
Autumn holding a winter chill.
And once again comes round the fifth,
A promise of scattered stars,
Of whizzing rockets and glowing wheels,
Bangs and screams both near and far.
Yet rain turns field and mind to mud,
Pours with no means of stopping,
Tramping home through murky puddles,
Wet, cold, and coughing.
And inevitably you will find,
Elsewhere the weather was dry,
Newspapers, TV, radio,
Detail those who died.
Children who are scarred for life,
Houses burnt to the ground.
Every year the same old story,
Each time the fifth does come around.
The autumn moon, a sight to behold,
Is now covered by a shroud,
When usually so silver and glowing,
Has been smothered by the cloud.
Always the prospect of autumn,
Like a torch of hope does gleam,
Yet so often we are disappointed,
and drown in the grey gloom
of autumn dreams
Author notes
basically it is grey and gloomy outside and i cant help thinking how autumn sucks. i like it when its nice and pretty outside, but not when its like this. Enjoy!
Written November 6th, 2006
A contest entry
- Level One: Difficulty: Painless by IndividualEleven.
600 points, ended January 29, 2007, 182 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - The I'm-sick-of-reading-crap contest. by AutumnsFlame.
507 points, ended May 12, 2007, 15 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 13 of 13
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Autumn
I was just browsing and saw your entry has the same Title as mine. Although I disagree with the picture you potray of Autumn.
It takes nothing away from the beautiful poem you have written. You did a wonderful job.
I wish you Good Luck in the Contest.
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Congrats on the gold. Personally I think you are very wrong. Of course we all have our opinions but I think that Autumn is the most beautiful time of the year. This was different and so I liked that.
Thanks for adding a little controversy to the others! 
Good luck!
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I liked the beginning of it and i liked how you ended it becasue they were different. your beginning was kind of fluffy, but the end was a heavy and dreary type like your words. the only thing was the transition was rather abrupt. if it was just a little smoother there, i think it could be a prefect poem.
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I thought this was beautiful... The seasons were metaphorical and stuff so people can relate to it. The only thing I'd say I had a problem with was in a couple lines your sylabols were kinda off.... Other than that, I thought it was cool... Thank you for entering my contest and good luck.
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look on the bright side, no bugs... thats enough to make me put up with brown and blah until the day i crumble to dust myself. Great work on this poem anyways, i think to really shine it would need some polishing, as currently it seems a bit simplistic, but unless you plan on really doing something with it its fine the way it is. Great work, thanks for entering, and best of luck in the contest!
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Thank you very much for entering this contest. I may add much more of a comment later on since there are so many other submissions.
You may want to keep in mind that I will try to open more of the same contests one after another if I can earn enough feedback to do so which I must say would be truly appreciated. Altogether, I hope this will also give everybody a glimpse at one of you're favorite accomplishments which hopefully in turn inspire them to look at what else you've got. -
The autumn moon, a sight to behold,
Is now covered by a shroud,
When usually so silver and glowing,
Has been smothered by the cloud.
amazing you have created a very real picture with your poem well done and good luck in my contest
laura xx -
Excellent write. Great imagery and flow. Good luck in my contest
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wow, awsome write. I especially liked the part that said, "Leaves to brown from summer green,No orange, gold or red, Trampled into the mud below Crumpled, blackened, dead." You really took me on a imaginary journy full of color. You had a emotion for each color i saw in my mind and you hit the nail right on the head. Great job.
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well...
you certainly took me around an unexpected bend in this one... not at ALL where i thought it was going !!! Nice touch indeed ! -
Fantastic!!!!
Wow...
Bring winds brisk and cold,
Glowing fingers, glowing face,
Leaves orange, red and gold.
/brillant/
Never quite what you expected,
The time drags on, and by the end,
You feel thoroughly dejected.
/how do you come up with this/
This might win!!!!!
Their are very few people who can rhyme and I won't even notice it until the end, then have to go back to make sure it was indeed intended, very well done!
Thanks for entering - Jacen an IndividualEleven.
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Well I know exactly what you are talking about here. I am sorry for the delay of your comment and this contest judging. I had a Famliy Emergency.
You did an amazing job.
Form: Was great
Word Choice GREAT!
Rhyme: Great
thanks for the entry
good luck
Great Job
xoxo
boi -
Well, it certainly does not look gloomy through the eyes of the person who sees Autumn through these beautiful words. Very nice work here poet!
Much Love ♥
Renee
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