Towering clouds cause
Ominous skies to build
Rain columns in the distance
Release moisture as she filled
Illuminating flashes
Display the driving force
Ravishing winds begin
Howling violently
Yielding massive swells
Tossed about repeatedly
Helpless against her fury
My Goddess soon prevails
Author notes
Acrostic
Written October 25th, 2006
A contest entry
- The Beauty Contest by BlackSwan.
425 points, ended May 4, 2008, 25 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Thunder & Lightning by RedAquarius.
1000 points, ended April 30, 19 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 14 of 14
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My only quibble is I might consider changing tenses here:
"as she filled" and "Tossed about" - I would change to fills and Tossing to better fit each section.
Purely a suggestion though, feel free to ignore me as it is your creation
Overall, quite a good acrostic (love the final line). -
ahhh the beauty of a storm
-thank you for your entry -
Acrostic...much talent in you!
The blend of the storm and sensuous subliminal messages
touched gracefully through out this poem.
Acrostic poetry is such a delicious form of poetry,
you wove the words excellently.
thankyou for your entry, judging will be nov. 23rd!
ears2hearyou
Kathleen : ))
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Oooo Intriging I like it , Storm
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Nice take!
My fav:
Helpless against her fury
My Goddess soon prevails
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The power of the storm,
guides one on their way
never more to just
drift with the winds of time.
Riftkin -
This is a fantastic take on the prompt. You did a superb job using acrostic form, and the word choice was excellent. The only thing I had a problem with (and this is just me), is the consistent lack of punctuation really took away from the flow. But it was still a great poem!
Best of luck in the contest!
Write on.
~*~SP~*~
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Nice! I love acrostics when they are so well composed you don't notice at first you are reading an acrostic and this is one of those. Passionate write. Thanks for entering.
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Hi light insight
Who better to tell us all about lightning
I love to read acrostics the same word in different hands creates so different experiences I loved this it takes you from the thunder and lightning to the wind and the swell moving effortless between thank you for entering all the best -
good
This is a wonderful acrostic and very well done. Filled with imagination and uniqueness. Thanks for sharing. I'll comment more after the contest.
Kari -
Good metaphor for this poem, it has vivid description and is powerful. Nice word choice and i like the subtle undertones in this. Great work.
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Mmmm, my kind of storm, literally. Hidden seductiveness in this, I like that. But then again, it is about a Storm. You sure know where to hit a gal's weak spots.
Very nicely done, thanks for entering sweetie and good luck.
Storm -
Good job! I like the title you chose and how you proceeded to conjure up a ravishing storm from it Nice job with this Acroustic! Keeps your attention until the end! We only get those kind of storms in Phoenix when we get Monsoon season in the summers! I miss the storms back home in Mi.
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Nice poem. Good imagery of weather in this piece. The acrostic style works well for this piece. Keep up the good work.
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