Inbreed
inburning
incandescently glowing
the flames of the sovereign lord
implanted his bad seeds against my will
deep into my womb; incestuously
living in fear …..sheer terror of giving birth
to the father’s bastard child
ostracized….accusation for MY immoral acts
the rage of hells fire burns cold against
my rr rage & HATE for YOU
I never call home
never speak the father’s name
dirty creek, dirty creek waters
washed all trace of the bastard child
from my womb….it’s just dirty dirty creek water
you the father; my father; called me a slut
the audacity of the disgrace to your family name
your fatherly hand in brut strong force
pushed me out of your house
I hit the stairs violently, landing in a bleeding crumpled heap
this bastard child was yours; I was your daughter;
just 16 sweet 16; I cursed, your name into eternity..
I never call home
never speak the father’s name
dirty creek, dirty creek waters
washed all trace of the bastard child
from my womb….it’s just dirty dirty creek water
nowhere to go; this nobody’s child
crept down in the dark, stumbling to the creek
hiding under a bush scared out of my mind INSANITY taking over
shaking in uncontrolled sobs, a new day;
blood was everywhere; so much blood
that mass of clotted, congealed blood; it was your child
my bastard child
with dirty creek washed away your shame dirty creek
I never call home
never speak the father’s name
dirty creek, dirty creek waters
washed all trace of the bastard child
from my womb….it’s just dirty dirty creek water
dirty creek, dirty water, dirty creek, dirty water, bastard child
dirty creek, dirty bastard child, dirty.......
Author notes
Option 6.I left turned my back and never looked back I have love in my life I am who I am because Iam...me
Written October 23rd, 2006
A contest entry
- Rape, Abuse, Assault by silencethequestion.
300 points, ended May 5, 2007, 29 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 13 of 13
-
very heartfelt and emotional
I am sorry for the torture you have been through.. i never got pregnant but i felt just as dirty as you. i totally understand where you are coming from with this one. i will understand if you do not read mine. again i am very sorry for your pain. i am here for you... -
wow, this is one of the best poems ive read in a long time.
kia kaha, nga nui aroha.
and keep the ink flowing. -
wow this was a very powerful write..there was alot of emotion and pain described in this poem..your words were emotional and strong keep writting your very talented
~Chrissy~ -
wow, this is very powerful, very good write. i just wanted to keep reading and reading, and im glad you were strong and are strong. im sorry this happend to you.thanks for entering the contest.
-
Holy shit!!!
Damn, this is one of the saddest fucking poems I've ever read! I'm so sorry you went through that, so sorry that you had such a piece of shit monster for a father{even calling him "father" is to good for him} I wish could say something that might explain the anger I feel at even thinking of things like this happening! I commend you on having the inner strength to overcome something this fucking horrific. I feel that the so-called "Men" that do this kind of shit should tortured and then killed very slowly. Anyhow, now that I'm done ranting, back to your poem. It was extremely well written and so saddening that you have to be unable of feelings to not be sorrowed and angered by it, as well as maybe shedding some sympathetic tears. Many kudos to you for having the strength to write this!
-
Shug thank you i just had to let this demon out have been around and in some form to some degree has strolled in the dark but this time what started out as a contest execise took over and i let so much out redrafts lost count tamed it down and glued it up a bit like me till i felt strong enough to look it in the eye. I know there is still some left but with the arms and heart of wolfie he is giving me the power to be free ...I never slept for days when i was writting this ccould just not close my eyes which was good in one way cos i fought back till i felt i had made good progress wont say won yet but am feeling pretty damn good. Thank you for being on hell of a friend shug....
sore arse... oh knife cut ..pain..bitch yeah i was last time i looked.....shug thanks.
-
Dustookie I'm really glad I got to read this one,not just because it's a great piece but to try and understand your sorrows.I can't really say too much about what happened to you but we all have stuff that makes us better people and all the stuff we chose to add to our self built bridge of inner strength,these hard learned experiences will one day be the footholes to a place few people will be gracious enough to enjoy,a place were everyone is accepted as themselves and will be classed as an equal.In this struggle that is living there are so many things left in the way to obstruct and disrupt our wellbeing,some have more to overcome than others and that my girl is what I'm saying it all adds up to make us more worthy of the pleasures that wait.I don't know if you're a believer but I think that there is always someone or something watching the life we lead,I'm not a religeous man but I just can't accept that all the suffering I've saw and been through is in vain.I know without a doubt that you will feel all the bad feelings that come with these things but take it from me you're a person I am lucky to know and am greatful to know,there is so much for me to say but at the end of the day I don't think it'll help your journey.You girl are a strength and an inspiration to me and for that I thank you each day.I know it's futile but I hope you're not getting down or I'll need to whip your ass with a staple gun and I'm not a bad guy but it'll hurt sooo bad,infact you may even shed a tear.I'm still conning the general public with my sore leg and I think I've developed a bunion on my lazy arse with all the sitting down I've been doing hee hee but you know me I'm still soldiering on.I will send you all my dearest thought for now and promise to catch you on the dark side.Shug
-
yeah now you know why i could not sleep for days and why i was at a crossroads....didnt know if i would even post it but this is the much edited write. I know you're there for me too and i really appreciate you.
-
thank you ....
-
thank you for you omment appreciate it. Yeah i thought about the 'dirty' repetition but i kept it in added more in the end because i really wanted to emphasis the point of the entire write it was dirty unclean and each time the abuse happened there was never enough water to wash it away for 5 years i was subjected to this till that last time. even when i was 'free' well that dirty unclean did not stop...
-
Mook, the demons need to come out Hun...I have to agree with everything Jeannie has written here, this is so painful Hun, but you are strong, you are not that child anymore, the blame isn't yours Babe, the shame isn't yours...it lays squarly on the shoulders of that 'flower'....powerful write Mook, once again finding myselfe standing to applaud, whilst slowly wiping tears of pride from my eyes...."
-
wow... this is a very powerful adn beautiful written piece... I like it a lot.. its sad and hreatbreaking and the reader can feel the emeotion.. I liked the chorusy part a lot... the only thing i was iffy about is if it was maybe a tad too much repition of the word dirty.... but that's probably just me.
Thanks for your comment! -
His fuking shame NOT yours! Hell is too good for him. You have risen above and beyond this innocent child, HE may have abused her, but YOU have risen like the phoenix from the ashes, STRONG, SELF RELIANT, LOVING, CARING, BEAUTIFUL INSIDE AND OUT. A beckon of hope and strength for others. It sickens me what we have had to endure in our lives. It angers me that these bad things ever had to happen. James has helped me SO much with what I have had to endure. If you need an ear, or a shoulder, I have two of each. Your flight isn't over. You are an inspiration to many. Hold your head high and reach for the stars. So proud of you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Jeannie
Adding your comment:
1 - 13 of 13
