Sometimes I can feel you,
Your happiness, your pain,
I can taste your essence,
When I taste the rain.
You teach me right from wrong,
For the wrong is sometimes right,
I can feel you all of the time,
But ever more I need a sight.
The world seems to stop,
I fail to hear your voice,
What you used you help me with,
It feels like it's my choice.
Though I can taste your essence,
I can feel your presence leaven,
Sometimes I need a little more,
-I need postcards from heaven.
Author notes
Okay. I have NO CLUE why I wrote this. I've never lost someone very close to me. It just seemed fitting.
P.S. Leaven means to lessen and lighten.
Written October 15th, 2006
A contest entry
- #4 Losing a loved one. by xox-lankan-xox.
500 points, ended March 13, 131 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - In Honor of reciving 100 HMs by peridotPixi.
681 points, ended July 8, 2008, 23 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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Thank you for the beautiful entry to my contest,
I like this and wow it came from nowhere that is really cool, I like how you say that you can taste the essence in the rain and that they teach you the right and the wrong and the wrong that is sometimes right, this is wonderful I love the bright text on the background it makes it even more beautiful and postcards from heaven is something I wish to receive from my grandparents more often thank you for sharing your thoughts and as always keep up the wonderful writing, ~ Amy
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wow!
this poem is very touching.
the first stanza was so calming to read. I have a best friend who had lost her mother and I was remembering her. she loves the rain and it is so fitting.
the poem also has hope in it. the person can feel the lost one and it gives such a nice feeling. the last line was very nice and ended the poem beautifully. sometimes, just a prescence is not enough. we need physical things to assure us that things are ok with another person or someone we love very much.
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Thank you for taking the time to enter this contest and the best of luck to you.
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Beautifully written.
Wow, this was beautifully written and it flowed so well! You have so much talent when it comes to poetry and I'm sure in other things too! Thanks so much for entering this wonderful piece into my contest and good luck! The ending was effective and great
. Keep up the amazing work! I will be around to read and comment more on your poems so until then take care! Bye, and once again good luck!
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Thanks!
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I really like this poem alot. It seems to embody everyone's whishes when they lose someone close to them, or even someone that they only knew for a short while. Good job.
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Gee, thanks!
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This poem is so cute! It has such an innocence that seems almost emitted straight from you. It has a very vivd imagery of the felling of lost. I really love this one, good job.
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Okay. Thanks.
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Very good. Though it's not to anyone in particular, I find this quite deep and touching. It does good for someone who loses a loved one. Thanks for informing me and sharing it.
One note though; the coloe you've chosen for the sentences kind of blends in with the background making this difficult to read. You may want to choose a darker color for the sentences or highlight them. Other than that, great job. 
Brian
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