I could blow
a thousand balloons
and tie a note
to every one
but never
let them go.
I've been wrong
a thousand times before.
I could drink
a thousand sodas
and write a poem
for every bottle
to carry clear
across the ocean
but beauty
can't swim that far alone.
I could whisper
a thousand whispers
in the silence
of the dark
but
whispers,
they'renot fuckin' loud enough.
I could pluck
a thousand petals
from the flowers
in my garden
but it would
hurt too much
so I won't.
Author notes
a poem for everything that could happen a thousand times, and everything that won't.
I don't have a literal garden. It's a poem about how futile the things I think are and about why I don't do as many of the beautiful things I believe in as I probably should. It's about all the times you've tried something and failed... and then finally stopped trying.
Written October 14th, 2006
In a list
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Comments
1 - 19 of 19
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Timeless and thought provoking
I think this poem is about the things that everyone can relate to. Fear, underpins what 'might have been', but it's also important not to lose sight that we are creators and as such, may be we shouldn't stop trying, ever.....
'Could' and 'won't', as in the first and last lines, suggest to me a stubborn streak that can prevent the fullness of a thousand petals to be realised.
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Very good.Keep it up! Stacey
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SWEET!!!
Wonderful!!! This is so fuckin amazing!!! It carries along and you never repeat you feelings you are always adding more.. I LOVE THIS!!!
Fantastic write!!!
-Shadow-
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Holy Hell! This is fantastic. Its so heartbreaking, maybe its just the place I am in now, but this is perfect. The feeling of hopelessness, there are so many things you could do, but would they matter? whispers not being loud enough... oh, this is so great. Thanks for writing!
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Great Imagery!
This is a very cool poem. I like the little snapshots of imagery it provides.~PeacE~GarY~ -
Love it!
Awesome poem! -
GREAT!
well written! I loved it! -
interesting
a very attractive writting, but i agree with 'lethal-x'the word could be changed to something else. otherwise i enjoyed it, good composition and nice layout. -
My goodness...I am a little suprised at the gem I have clicked on here.
I don't know what I was expecting but this is very unique with an edge I like.
I love the format this poem is presented in. It adds to the "flavor" of the feeling rendered.
Creative and different write.
Blessings! Tammy -
I really enjoyed this piece. It has it's own very unique feel... Angsty but so well spoken. A grieving rant of conviction. I feel tied to so many faces, ones I shall never find again in this lifetime - and this piece kind of took me there. A sort of longing... With one word to show the frustration of it all in one crude sweep. It has a lot of effect, does stick out, but that is one of the things that I liked about it. All together; this piece has a great form and flow. Very fresh.
...Intriguing really.
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I like how all of the poem is either to the left or to the right but at the end it's in the middle. Like before you were uncertain but at the end it was solid and confident. I love this imagery you used.
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This is different. I like new, and I like different. Interesting format you used here - it's really beautiful. Very nice.
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good
Beautifully written but is seems to be lacking something at the end. Not sure what it is but the ending just left me feeling as if it wasn't finished. -
this poem was really good! Although the places where the lines were confused me. (Then again...alot of stuff does.) But other than that this poem was very emotional and great! (I like the plucking the flower petals part. ^.^)
Keeps it ups.
!!!Monica!!! -
I'm amazed at the growth between these poems and the ones in your book, and that came out what, last year? (not that those weren't great as well but you know what I mean).
You do the what "it coulds" better than anyone. I love your ideas. Great write. -
A great poem for all the could be's and what if's. Another wonderful write from you. Thanks for sharing.
Sara -
This is the first I've read of you in quite some time, Greg, but I must say that you still amaze me. I feel that this is your best in quite some time. I think it shows that you are only getting better.
You had strong sensory imagery, and you were fluent and effective. You had no baggage, here; all was necessary and complete. Enter this as a prewrite somewhere, and I'd wager you'd win a trophy.
Have a great day; update me on how you've been, eh?
Justin
(And by the by, I'm bookmarking this for sure.) -
I absolutely adored this poem! The flow was so raging poet, but in a good, out-of-the-box kind of way. I really liked how you formed the words, it was a great visual emphasis =]
On the other hand, I didn't think the fuckin' you added in the ethord stanza really fit that well. It actually kind of shook the whole sad but majestic mood of this piece for me. I also don't really understand the
"I could pluck a thousand petals...but it would hurt too much"
Unless it's something personal, it's a little hard to see why plucking soft, beautiful petals would hurt. Maybe something like 'but a hundred flowers would be bare' or something along those lines, but its just a suggestion.
I thought this was a beautiful, amazing piece nonetheless! Bookmarks for sure =]
xx -
damn, thats well damn good, at first i thought the formation would throw me off, but it flowed nicely, cant really point out what i liked the most cause i liked it all, nice one.
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