Fly away, fly away,
fly away, dawn,
leave the earth cloaked in the mantles of the night.
Abdicate, abdicate,
abdicate, o sun,
leave the throne of the heavens to the dark, the usurper.
Leave on your golden wings
and do not return,
for my love has flown,
flown out of my reach
and the light will illuminate the open wounds I have hidden.
Shroud the sky, shroud the sky,
let the day come no more,
let the darkness oppress till it stifles,
stifle the pain I cannot endure if I see it exposed to all.
Hide me, hide me,
hide from one face: the face of my love
whose countenance I cannot bear to see.
My vizard, my mask, my identity
lies raw and open to the sky.
It shall not see me.
I ban the day.
Author notes
Gem and SITW will recognize this as a poem to my crush(these dont come too often, I dont often write about romance!) So dont tease me, SITW and Gem!!! I know what you're thinking and I can't take it!!!
-Cat
P.S.- xxBrokenbyLovexx, this is option #4.
P.P.S. fallen-leaf, this is option #4.
P.P.S. baby buttercup, option #1.
Written October 8th, 2006
A contest entry
- Five Options! by fallen-leaf.
450 points, ended February 9, 2007, 69 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - OPTIONS!!! by Dragonollia.
475 points, ended January 19, 2007, 8 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - It feels like the end of the world by Teenage Confessions.
650 points, ended February 1, 2007, 36 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Any and all types of Love by Kristin Melissa.
600 points, ended February 2, 2007, 65 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - "I Never Win Contest!" by kennybaby05.
380 points, ended January 23, 2007, 16 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Many Options..... Please look by teenagefailure.
375 points, ended January 31, 2007, 73 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - FOR ANYONE!!! by Innocent Evil.
370 points, ended January 28, 2007, 14 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Just Look by Maybe Anastasia.
300 points, ended March 23, 2007, 26 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Hmmm... by AkaBaki.
600 points, ended February 17, 2007, 27 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Many Options... Prewrites allowed by gothprincess7.
500 points, ended August 27, 82 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - I want to Feel The Fiery Passion by EternalFyre.
450 points, ended February 20, 2007, 39 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - ♥♥♥ Lots of Options, Lots of Types of Poetry, Lots of Stuff For You!♥♥♥ by xxRainbowDawnxx.
400 points, ended March 3, 2007, 63 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 19 of 19
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Very sad and confused. Love sometimes is one of the most hurtful things that happens to us. In fact, I'd say it IS the worst, as the pain of it all lasts much longer than any physical illness. I understand that lies, deceit and unrequinted love are torteous and I would ban the day that someone I loved would find out ever single feeling I had /have for them. Sometimes I feel too keeping things hidden are sometimes safer for this lil ole' heart of mine.
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I'm lovin it :)
Great job. i love it. Keep it coming -
This is a really good write. I like the flow of this. The rhythm behind it was really nice too. Powerful write. Keep up the good work.
Love always,
Kristen ღ -
this is such a wonderfull write,
thanks you so much for entering my contest!!
Good job!!!
And Good luck!!!
E~R~I~N -
wow...u've tried to get this poem to win a lot huh? well thank you for entering my contest, I liked reading this.
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yah, but it never does...made finalists once, but nothing came up. This comes fro teh bottom of my heart, and it hurts to see it thrown aside.
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I like this it is very good! Good work...
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I love all the long words!
it adds amazing vivacity to the poem
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Commented by Judge
great write. I love you choose to write a romantic write. I also love how you did your authors notes. great write and good luck in the contest -
Wonderfful flow.
Wow. This poem had an amazing flow to it! Its a beautiful write, full of meaning. Thank you so much for entering my contest and good luck! -
this is very nice, and im sorry for the misunderstanding we had, lol, it like how i can tell how your angry, but almost relieved at the same time, this is great work, thanks for entering and good luck in the contest
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very nice. please put the option in the comment box. thanks for entering.
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Ahhhh beautiful!!!!
Ahhhh beautiful!!!! You have done this poem well, it flows really well and great imagary, emotion and feeling one feels as they read this write... I enjoyed this poem!! Tracey -
I haven't lost anyone...AG knows what I'm talking about...but I am stuck in a class w/ him and the crush comes and goes...lol it used to be so bad that I couldn't even look at him...let alone speak to him...but now I make as much good fun of him as everyone else...SITW knows! So this was written in a nadir of my feelings...I love that word...nadir....new poem coming on!
-Verix -
Really great write! I really enjoyed this piece. The thing that struck me right away was the repetition, which you did an excellent job on, and really added emphasis.
Fly away, fly away,
fly away, dawn,
leave the earth cloaked in the mantles of the night.
Abdicate, abdicate,
abdicate, o sun,
leave the throne of the heavens to the dark, the usurper.
Leave on your golden wings
and do not return,
for my love has flown,
flown out of my reach
I really love that whole part. I loved the entire thing, but that part was my favorite. I thought it was excellent how you described the sun leaving on golden wings, and then said your love had flown away. This struck me as a comparison, that you were saying you love had flown away, leaving you in darkness. Really, really good. I very much enjoyed this write. -
astounding
Oh..wow...there are a lot of poets on this site, and I read a lot of their poems...some are okay, some are..well, not okay, lol..but this one is among some of the best I have seen in a long time! It's so clear, and it absolutely makes sence! I'm very sorry about whatever loss you have had, but poetry makes a wonderful release...and thus, it makes a wonderful friend. I hope things go better.
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leave the earth cloaked in the mantles of the night.
lol I had a feeling it was about...him
XP
well, I have no right to make fun of you, especially since I'm constantly like JM!!! *heart* *heart* XD
well written-beautifully done!!!! wow-keep it up, you have a beautiful choice of words!
pegleg -
This piece begs for gratitude from those who read it, but I cannot seem to find the proper words. So here is what I've got-it's beautiful and even though you may not write with this style nor flare of romanticism often-you've done it well.
~Justice -
:F:F:F
wow this was great and im glad that i got to read it. i love how u set this up and the words you chose to get your message accross!!
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