Rain and Memory
So softly falls the April rain,
it does not wet the ground.
Each droplet clangs upon the roof,
emits a tinkling sound.
So softly treads grey memory,
it causes no uproar;
like April rain, it comes and flees
across life's fading shore.
Author notes
Written October 7th, 2006
A contest entry
- It's so easy, It's hard II by Nam.
400 points, ended October 11, 2006, 6 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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Nice
I like it Joss. Almost perfect meter, and sounds beautiful when read aloud. I also like the two different meanings for the first stanza and the second, tied together by the rain(and the title!). Very nice--welcome to Constructive Criticism Group. Charlynn
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Thanks shastadassey.
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Thanks David for the comments and the cup. I must say
so far I have not read any poems about April rain.So
I am not aware it's a clitch.But no I know.
Edited on Oct 12, 10:14 p.m. because ''. -
congratulations, this flowed softly and precisely, I could smell the rain,,,I do agree with David, the April part could have been more generic, but other than that it works fine
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Aside question:
Don't you think that "April rain" has been used enough in any work? It is quite the cliché phrase and frankly has been done to death. It sometimes makes it seem as if no other month is there rain. Where I live it really doesn't matter, it rains all the time - perhaps in some places it just rains in April. Just a little bug of mine. Certain things get used to death yet people still find ways to kick it.
It's really nothing negative against your piece, I thought you wrote quite a lovely poem. I just find "April rain" aka "April showers" just overly used.
But other than that: great piece.
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Hi Joy. Thanks for checking in and the encouraging words.
Oh, that's water melon background. I thought it was a shore.
I am not so sure I like it now. I'll keep it for a few days
because you like it and change it.
joss
Edited on Oct 10, 6:52 because ''. -
Perfect! Short & sweet and like it's watermelon background it left me satisfied! nice flow! joy
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Lencio,
Comments like that uplifts my spirit.
Thanks a lot.
Delightedly,
Joss
Edited on Oct 09, 8:40 p.m. because ''. -
Beautifully written, I am glad I got to read this wonderful write from you Joss
Love and light,
Lencio
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