Forget about our plans tonight, I can not make it.
Nevermind my love tonight, it has faded.
Don't worry about me tonight, I'll be okay;
I know you'll miss me tonight, but I just can't stay.
Please do not mourn tonight, it'll only hurt you more.
Do not cry tonight, although your heart is sore.
Do not bleed tonight, I'm just not worth it.
You will remember tonight, though you'll try to forget.
Don't be afraid tonight, you're never alone.
Do not feel guilty tonight, I'm on my own.
Do not escape tonight, tomorrow will be better.
Don't lie to me tonight, say you'll love me forever.
I'll be gone by tonight, it'll be too late to
Kiss me tonight, it was simply my fate.
I'll be in your dreams tonight, so look out for me;
I'll say I'm sorry tonight, but I just had to leave.
Don't isolate tonight; things are better this way.
Don't fade away tonight, for her sake you must stay.
Please don't hate me tonight; don't wonder why.
Sorry to hurt you tonight, but it's my time to die.
Author notes
Option 14; hopefully this isn't cliche.
There once was a 40 year old guy,
and he was addicted to porn.
He had a little accident,
and supposedly died by his own hand.
The end. =D
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"i wanna live to love"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
for XxVampireTearsxX:
option 6
♥ dancing on your grave ♥
A contest entry
- Break My Broken Heart by Poetic-Dreamer.
300 points, ended October 19, 2006, 10 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - CHOP-SUI(CIDE) by Nephalaneous lover.
375 points, ended July 1, 2007, 10 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - suicide poems that don't suck by aeolia.
380 points, ended January 1, 2008, 104 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 16 of 16
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This was a really really well written piece. (And obviously i'm not the only one who thinks so) I really liked the repatition in here. It seems almost fitting for a song. Great write and thanks for entering
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well done..my favorite line
Do not escape tonight, tomorrow will be better.
good luck and thank you for your entry -
wow...i really like this...i mean it just hooked me from the first line..finalist!
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Wooooaaahhhh... okay, there was like one weak rhyme in there:
Do not escape tonight, tomorrow will be better.
Don't lie to me tonight, say you'll love me forever.
But besides that, I thought this was pretty damn good... It reminds me of the song "I Won't See You Tonight" by Avenged Sevenfold.... and that's a damn good song like this poem is damn good. Thank you for entering my contest and good luck. -
this was one of the best entries, this brought me to tears it is so beautiful,good luck in my contest...i felt so many things will reading this thank you for entering my contest ,(four thumbs up, if i had more than two)
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This is a very nice wirte. My favorite lines are:
Don't isolate tonight; things are better this way.
Don't fade away tonight, for her sake you must stay.
Please don't hate me tonight; don't wonder why.
Sorry to hurt you tonight, but it's my time to die.
Thank you for your Entry best wishes
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nice very nice! I love the way it sounds like a suicide note! The flow was just so perfect! this poem took my breath away! You should be proud! Good luck! Good Job!
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this was a great write and i really enjoyed reading this write as well...i can really relate to this and it flowed so perfectly keep writting your talented and good luck in the contest
~Chrissy~ -
Great job
I think you did a really good job with this poem. Good luk in the contest.
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Nice.
This is a nice write. It's filled with a lot of emotion. It is sad, but written very nicely. The flow was perfect, and the rhyming flawless. The repitition of "tonight" within every stanza made your piece stronger, and helped the words hit home. Great job, I hope to read more from you.
Good luck in the contest, and thank you for entering.
~Manic
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WOW
this is a really good write
excellent job
the rhyme is flawless
and how you put tonight in every sentence..
it added much more effect to the poem
great job
keep it up
good luck in the contest
NeveR ♥
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I like this a lot, I haven't read anything quite like it before. Good luck in the contest, take care
x
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wow....................u can spark deep emotion with mere words.....wow.excellent
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Awwwwwww
this is so sad..and i hope you win the contest lol you have written this very well and i love the repitition of "tonight".
really excellent.
keep writting!!!
xXx Sian xXx -
This is so sad. You did a wonderful job showing
how he may have been thinking. I love your choice
of wording here. good job. -
Part of me really wonders/wishes he had writen this because he tried to die last night but he woke up this morning. I want to cry for this and a month a go I would have been speechless because of the tears blurring my vision but now I just want to go back a week and just sit in my back seat with him doing nothing but sitting and sleeping (clothed) part of him died that day though and your poem made me see it. Thank you.
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