Spitballs from the balcony
clamor in the eve
change of mindful promise
under axe’s cleave.
thoughts of bloody murder
under veiling smile
clutching glass where sordid
shards of anger pile.
someone’s death rehearsal
bound inside a hiss
tiny bells alerting
exit’s bitter kiss.
purpose undetermined
banked as labled hope
broken hearts which ferment
twist on poisoned rope.
For all the times of silence
and some for in between
there'll be relief in sight,once
justice makes the scene.
Author notes
O' anger,
your belly's hardly ransomed
full,but judged;
pity the victim's spawn.
Written October 5th, 2006
A contest entry
- Speak out! by Luna Argintie.
930 points, ended September 9, 2008, 205 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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You Have Been Hoodwinked!
A very well crafted piece! Excellent alliteration and word choice. Great flow & tone and a much enjoyable read!
Love & Light
Debbera You have been Hoodwinked by a member of the group The Poetic Bandits.

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Every line of this....
...is so well worded, as to take all of my senses and sent them to heaven!!!! This is an infinite sweetness for your readers!!!!!

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First of all, this is extremely well-written, as always. I would probably try to delve deeper into the meaning of the poem, if it weren't for the title. I think some might take this as humorous, though you think it angst. Reminds me of the time when I went to see Arachnaphobia in the theater, and some idiots started through wrapped candies from behind. Scared the bejeebers out of me!
In this poem, I can see both the person trying to enjoy a play or musical and the bored teenager up in the balcony doing anything but watch! You've portrayed both quite vividly, and I enjoyed reading the poem -
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Hah! Thanks so much gal. You alright? Miss you, ya know.
This poem is behind the veil of upset and because it is dealing with someone very close to me, I have to keep it at arm's length and/or with a sense of vaguity. The humorous reaction is interesting since I use that format for most of my really hurtful experiences.'Sayeth the comedienne.." Oh, but weren't it for the muscles of a smile, I'd stand upside down"
I hear you on Arachnaphobia. Yikes, that would have gotten me..hahaha. Your conclusive guess works. I always use childhood ditties to complete its prophecy of a later mishap.
Thank you.....!!! Blessings for safety and joy. Love, Cookie/Di
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The third stanza is very evocative in its imagery. Well done!
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makes Golum(lord of the rings) sound like the
Very, Very Dark! Juicey Dark undertones of every kind can be found cemented here! You've got the gift!!!!
...sound like the Pope!
Edited on Oct 21, 12:17 because 'add'. -
Utterly, sister. Something has ended so that something else must start. Angry.....even though I place it at the foot of the bed, and bookmark it in my bible. I've changed. I think I should have. I was worried that I hadn't before.
We'll talk o'er the meadow
where the blossoms yield
all the red and yellow
blooms in yearlings' field.
Thank you..........Dianne.... -
Wrath?
Do I detect frustration, anger ... impatience?
Be not too disillusioned. Time is coming to its victorious stop. Behold: a Flower blooms in Meadows soon.
Myra
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I loved lines 13-18..
An excellent write of course..perfection.. I would not expect less from you.
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