drink deep of the fruit of my fingertips
run your tongue across your lips so as to
let not a single drop escape your consumption
take into yourself all of me
imbibe the thoughts of my heart
swallow the marrow of my bones
take the fullness of my expression
and explain to me more than I had hoped to convey
give back to me of myself, only more, only better…
better because it has entered into you
and been massaged by your heart
been filtered through the deepest bowels of you
to take on your very essence
now bearing your sweat, your very own blood
your very own soul
return it to me, so I can revel in…
what it has meant to you
what it has given to you
what it has taken from you
what it has done to you
let me know
let me see, and feel, and taste
the effect of my fruit on your soul
explain to me more than I had hoped to convey
take from me
explain to me
give to me
return
to
me
d
e
a
r
+
and I will give you yet more again
Author notes
Written October 4th, 2006
A contest entry
- A family of friends by .
450 points, ended December 12, 2006, 6 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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First off, I love the aethetics of this poem, as well as the amazing content. The background is also very pretty ^_^
The use of metephor and imagery was done very well; I love when people take things and pair with the incorrect senses, and make ideas into objects. I think it's the complete basis of poetry, and you have done it so well! The romatisism (SP?) was beautiful, and it was amazingly gripping.
Thank you so much for sharing this! I hope to read more from you soon. -
Superb
A very fine romantic write indeed. You/ve expressed yourself quite well. Thanks for sharing this one with us.
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well to be honest im not a big fan of this type of poetry, unless its done really well. frist congratues on the gold, but now my opioin. you used a lot of metaphors but they didnt carry any weight or have any impact. its as if you tried to write elegently but it didnt quite work. but of cource im just one person, but consider my words.
once again congrats on the gold. -
This is beautifully written! Your words and emotions flow together wonderfully and the poem is simply amazing. Great job!
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it's a great poem. Can I translate it to Chinese? I can post it to a Chinese poem forum?
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yes, I remember commenting o this some time ago. Still as effective, a passionate piece that simply spills from the pen.
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Amazing ! I love it :]
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YES i do agree with your authors comments about the expression of the bowel in this poem. as you said, a true poet would be able to depict its place of usage. i thought it read very artistically. very well done
. Rewarded 4
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A Tender Tribute
This tribute to your friend contains the essence of how two minds/hearts/souls intertwined can communicate, braided strength transforming and increasing their grasp. Ahh, for friends that understand.
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I like the words you use to express things. How you use words that were once used, but not much anymore. The expression and the emotion are very well expressed. You bring a certain something to your poem.
Nice job! -
I thought this poem was a sweet one, but I find myself thinking of sensuous purity. Let me explain that further. The drinking from the cup that represented your blood and all that was you reminded me of the wine that was supposed to be the blood of jesus, so that is where I got purity from. The words you used, however, had me in mind of something very sensuous and intimate and the contradiction made the poem all the more beautiful. I loved it and am glad you won a trophy for such a great write. Great job and keep writing.
Hugs and Kisses,
Tiphanie -
This is very intimate, I enjoyed it. Lines seventeen to twenty-one were my personal favorites; there is just something really sweet about them. Good luck in your contests!
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this is awsome.....i love how you put this togeather, it's sentual and deep, flowing over the page like a waterfall of ink.....good job
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I love that....it lead well into the soul of a poem..and in to the soul of this poet. One can ask for nothing more.
. Rewarded 4
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Wow this is such a delight to read
,so beautiful that it touches the readers hearts ,a great tribute to your friend indeed,Hazel
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I actually use the word ...bowel in a poem I wrote called ..Prodigal Prophet...the bowels of the virgin forest....
Not so strange.
This was an absolute joy to read.
Almost an Adam and Eve story going
OR last supper
with the sharing of the wine.
I thought this was brilliant.
Good job my friend.
MANY BLESSINGS,
LOWELL POE.
. Rewarded 6
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Beautiful
It is the most excellent poem about poetry that I have ever read. It is true to ever letter. What an amazing flow and meaning it will certainly catch many a peoples hearts. Pam must be an extra ordinary person to inspire such beautiful art work. Don't stop taking inspiration from this person with this kind of portrait!!!!!!
. Rewarded 6
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Beautiful
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the word bowels is an expression of depth in a soul...it is appropriate here ...maybe like no other word would describe
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I absolutely love this poem!!!
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I thought this poem was so beautiful...It really explains how the author feels about his inspiration... Simple but yet a wonderful piece of work...
GRACY
. Rewarded 4
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Wow. In my p.o.v. there really aren't any words to say except whoa. Definetly keep it up.
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wonderful poem, I loved how you composed this... great passion, love and a deep desire. I felt I could read between the lines as well. great job well done... Vickie
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i love it
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expressive -
i like this poem, bowels is such a word that goes back like a rocking chair, and symbolizes the very gut, core and holder of all instincts and feelings, good that you shed light on this and didnt change for anyone...great job
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This is a great poem. What does the word bowels mean in this poem?
. Rewarded 8
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Basically,
it means the "belly"...what we sometimes call the innards or guts. Classically and going back into antiquity, the guts were considered to be the place and source of the emotions, much more so than the heart.
Thanks for the claps!
dp
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You have great imagery in this line I questioned the use of 'bowels' as well - due to English not being my native tongue I suppose, so thank you for explaining that in your author's notes
Leander -
Remember commenting on this before, when I read bowels - LOL Still wonderful to read the second time round as well.
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you write as if you have marbles in your mouth
I love the biblical terms you've crafted into this poem and the fruit imagery is strong. touch taste and smell focus your poem and make it feel real to the reader, im amazed by this piece and glad i came across it.
I see this piece is already popular so i'll cut my comment short but.. keep up your writing.!!
x
. Rewarded 6
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Like a song I can /almost/ hear the music in my ears =o It flows so naturally just like music! But like a song, I tuned out the lyrics and can only ear the music x)
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Excellant
Very well written indeed. With most excellant imagery.
A very good description of friendship, somewhat reminds me of Kahlil Gibran's essay(s) on Friendship and Love, from his book: "The Prophet".
http://geocities.com/Athens/5484/Gibran.htm -
This is so heart touching,poignant,has a great flow to it,this is so unique in its own way and also beautiful indeed,a refreshing read!,Hazel
. Rewarded 4
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good job
i don't have a big speech about it, i just like it, thats all. well done. -
how much more casn you ahem give her? a lucky friend indeed TAMS to have such thoughts dedicated to/for her thanks for sharing regards zaj
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Sometimes a poet can use too many words, but you used every word in exactly the right place at the right time in the right amount. Remarkable writing, and extraordinary detail. My time was well spent reading this.
. Rewarded 4
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Extraordinary
I can't think of the right word..besides extraordinary. I really love this poem! Your style flows so well and is truly original. The poem touched me..and made me smile..made me remember. It's quite powerful, and I commend you in your portrayal of an exterior and moreso interior intimacy. Beautifully done. Bravo. I especially loved the ending and your choice to compose a sort of modern concrete poem. -
yes, but "bowel" has modern ugliness that should warrant consideration of a "nicer" synonym.
just debating for the sake of debate ^_^
this was sweeping. i really liked it
. Rewarded 4
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WoW
I didn't realize that someones words can touch my heart so deeply! Everyone here at AP are true Loves of Poetry!!! I for one is one of those who LOVE poetry and writing words to touch others hearts and souls!!!!!! I really like this poem!!!
. Rewarded 4
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Really Like This One.............
This really hit my heart and soul!!!Your words so very profound impress upon me the true meaning of poetry!!! When the reader returns their comment and how it made them feel or how they could or could not relate to your words it shows true poetic brilliance and that is just what you have done with this piece!!! Thanks for sharingyour talent with me tonight!!!~~Toni~~
. Rewarded 6
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fascinating format.
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applaud this poem
A nice tribute to your friend and what can I say but WOW I love this so much and says how you really feel. This one really floored me and took my attention. Very well written
. Rewarded 4
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i am sorry i already rated your poem but i do love it and i love your spiral border
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Many apologies. I've read and commented on this piece...but since I've wasted your points, a ribald joke: I hope she wasn't faking it.
Good piece really. Pen on. Or qwerty on. -
this was amazing, i dont really know what else can be said except that...this i a great tribute to a friend, but even more, a tribute to all of the true poets out there, living out their lives largely unappreciated...for all of them I say :THANK YOU!!! best lines: "take into yourself all of me
imbibe the thoughts of my heart
swallow the marrow of my bones
take the fullness of my expression
and explain to me more than I had hoped to convey
give back to me of myself, only more, only better…
better because it has entered into you
and been massaged by your heart
been filtered through the deepest bowels of you
to take on your very essence
now bearing your sweat, your very own blood
your very own soul"
again, thank you!!!
. Rewarded 8
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Bowels of Mercy & Love
Hi! Wow...I thought I was on my way somewhere else & you grabbed me. Glad this happened! This is so delightfully luscious! I'm beside myself in emotion right now & I can see brought on by a Bible Scholar! Yes! Well you topped off my night. Time for Bible Study & prayer. BFN. Thanks.
. Rewarded 6
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I love your name...
Thank you, dear, for your kind and encouraging words. I'm glad that you were blessed by this poem...this write is special to my heart, as is the lady by whom it was inspired and for whom it was composed. I just finished my bible study, so I pray yours is edifying to your soul and your spirit. Good night, and God bless!
dp
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Your writing really drew me in and held my attention deeply within it. It seemed like a very driven poem with certain goals and i feel like they were all attained in the last line! brilliant!
. Rewarded 4
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This is a great poem. I enjoyed reading!
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THis was one of the best poems about love and friendship and admiration I have read in a whjile Thank you.
. Rewarded 4
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OMG that was amazing...I really really liked it
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great
In this you capture what poetry is about: vulrablity, sharing, feedback, and understanding what the world means. thank you fo sharing.
. Rewarded 4
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wow. im very impressed. the words are simple yet intelligently used. i also like the way you typed out the ending. it gives your poem flavor and uniqueness
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This is a wonderful poem. The reader of poetry can be consumed by the fire that drives the writer, led down the path of deepth beyond the ability grasp the essence. Nice refrain-what it has- It does leave one to move through the flow and rhythm without a rest to digest thoughts, line break might work. Thanks for the read
chiefmac -
There is a word that seems a bit out of place, but you're right, "bowels" is definitely not it. Good word choice by the way.
"massaged" seems a bit too pedestrian, almost too tame. Tame in the sense that Aslan was not a tame lion. This poem is not a tame poem. "Massaged" does not fit, the flow lurching back and forth for a moment as I read it.
When I read your explanation for the use of "bowels" I was only that much more confident in my critique. Don't attempt to draw the path like stepping stones from the heart to the bowels. This serves only to lessen the transition from the outside to the inside.
Other than this one word I like this poem. It is sensuous yet reserved, expressive yet coy, passionate through and through. The beauty of good poetry is the undertow of emotion that has no place within the words but rather emerges as the poem grows into its own, like seeing the tip of an iceberg and then submerging beneath the swaying waves to bear witness to the true enormity of the arctic titan.
Well done!
. Rewarded 8
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It's very open.
I feel like you're giving me more than I want. I don't know what to do with it. It's a bit much for me to handle. Thanks anyway. I can't be that intimate with someone I don't know. -
< The obnoxious clappers not withstanding...*ahem*
I find that the one who was inspiration for this poem is
PERFECT
in every way, shape, form, and fashion...
[...um, more so on the shape and form, less so on the fashion...]
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I think this needs a punctuation check, although I'm not certain as my punctuation is terrible in itself. Just a suggestion though. Go back and look over it grammatically, if there is no changes to be made then my bad.
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LOL
Tam will laugh at that comment...I'm sure.
I'm a school teacher, so I know the rules...and I've read this poem at least a hundred times, so I'm pretty sure I like it the way it is. Do you have any particular concerns? -
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No, no. I abuse the comma too much myself, so I probably saw spots where I would put in a comma. That being said the comma probably doesn't actually belong in that spot. Apologies.
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LOL, see what I meant?? LOL
No apology necessary, dude. Comma abuse is pretty common here on AP...I've seen poems with a comma at the end of nearly every line. There is clear misuse and lack of use of punctuation on this site. However, that said...there is a LOT of latitude in poetry for those who KNOW the rules...and how they can be manipulated without making things worse than they should be. Writing poems without most kinds of punctuation is perfectly acceptable, but some things would call too much attention to themselves if they were missing. For instance, a line break can take the place of a comma since it can create a natural pause for the reader. In the end, it is the poet's call...but sometimes the poet is clueless that a call even needs to be made. LOL
In FLP, there "could" be MUCH more punctuation, but I like it how it is now because the appearance of the poem w/o the added marks far outweighs the benefit they would bring...and for this poem, appearance has a BIG effect on the overall emotional impact. If I added punctuation and left-justified this, a massive amount of its impact would dissipate. To me, the poem reads just fine. I reread every poem I write, sometimes out loud, to make sure the presentation and pacing is what I want it to be. Thanks for your comments though.
Be blessed.
dp
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YAY! congrates on the gld it is well deserved. You have a very impressive way of captivating the reader with your words and flow. Great write!
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A Very Good Use of Talent
Your words are so unique and you style is original. I love this poem from start to finish. You are an amazing poet. I hope to see you publish a book in the near future. I agree with the judges who gave you the gold trophy for this because it deserved it. Keep writing and I'll keep reading.
. Rewarded 6
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This sounds familiar. I don't know if I read and commented on it. Poetry is a useful tool for different things.
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beautiful
beautiful write....very hearftfelt and emotional....
"take into yourself all of me
imbibe the thoughts of my heart
swallow the marrow of my bones
take the fullness of my expression"
Favorite part of the poem......lol
♥~Brittany!
. Rewarded 4
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Just write it is ineed
Well what to say, what to say for so true are the words that you put to virtual paper that they may be consumed by any who venture forward to add,detract, reshape what it is that you have put to this fragile canvas and virtual paper.
I find a little reflection of myself in your words for I to give and give of myself.
I like it, I like it so!
. Rewarded 6
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This is exquisite in it's sensuality. I loved every word of it. The shape of the down turned pen dripping ink is the icing on the cake. Cogratulations on the gold. well deserved
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Thanks...
The shape of this poem has been interpreted as a flower/tulip (which is what I perceived while constructing it), as a hypodermic needle (injecting the thoughts), and now as a quill pen with ink...not too mention a couple of things I won't mention. And believe it or not, there are a small number who say the shape detracts or distracts (LOL
) from the piece, and that it should be left aligned. 
I like your view of it...it certainly fits the appearance and the theme. Thanks for your comment.
dp
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The essence of communion is when two merge into a common union. The whole becomes greater the sum and the offering of each is enhanced by the union. Each becomes the mirror of the other and the reflection of each in the other enhances both the union and the parts. Our poetry is a cry to be seen and heard, and to share an essence that is beyond prose. We open our hearts and extend them with an open hand trusting that someone, anyone will see and hear the depths we hide. When our cry is heard and reverberate in the heart of another it offers a mirror into the soul of each. Thank you for vulnerability.
Your use of metaphor is consistent and effective, The lay out the last few lines brings focus to your promise. It is creative and enjoyable.
. Rewarded 8
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Very Good!
Different- and poets will "get it.'Your use of "bowels" is indeed a correct use, altho most folks would have no clue. However, that's what poetry is about- words.
. Rewarded 4
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Wow beautifully done, I really liked it. Great job.
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I think this is genius writing and wonderful!
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Well written and flowed extremely well. ou have showed a great writters skill with this write. Thee for you.
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wow... the simple feelings expressed are great and not a single word missplaced.
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a exellant write of deadication to your friend with a fantastic flow good luck and keep penning
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WOW this is a very beautiful piece and I greatly enjoyed it I love the flow and the message here is a wonderful one this is a truely wonderful piece thank you for sharing this
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It is fairly common for poets to find the right words to express a voice of heart... yet, it becomes rare for them to be woven together so poignantly that the same emotion meant for one can be shared by many. This is magnificent work, something to be proud of, something to bless another with, and, truly something to be remembered by anyone who reads it. Well done! ~SoAp
. Rewarded 8
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well done
Well done, put together nicely. Good job and keep writeing. -
Excellent....I'm sure Tam will love it....good luck
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good poem, written very creatively. nice use of words.
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Bowels? I had no problem with that, since I saw it in the context it was meant. Marrow, however? Just kind of struck me... even though I understand the reasoning. Ah, well.. we all read differently, and that's what makes it great!
. Rewarded 4
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Wow, that's absolutely amazing.
Great work indeed. I can imagine
how Tam feels to have something
like this dedicated to himself or
herself. Powerful words. -
wow i like
love it its a deep write... -
i enjoyed this And THOUGHT the ending was the best part "take into yourself all of me" might have been re
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