In the dark street we found an old shop to attain our end and wish,
A magic spells cook book covered with a dark leather frame.
A clean old copper cauldron, and part of an out of the ordinary bowl,
and few other things we bought, what and why, to you we won’t divulge names.
The Shopkeeper told us to be careful with all that old stuff,
but for the two of us silly as we are, no warning was just enough.
On our way home, we were giggling like all witches do,
then, over the fence we jumped slightly into the city zoo.
Black cat, turtle, raven, even a spider were on the list.
For charmed scarves we had to visit another magic store
because our magic spells had to be well prepared with no twist
Like two cute witches we needed some good, glittery decor.
In our cellar we had to prepare the love potion for our guys,
only to enchant them to love us and nobody had to die.
But, alas, just as we started with our magic spells job
silly raven started to turn all around like a black orb.
Dog wanted to chase cat and cat jumped to catch a mouse,
owl was looking for our spider when the cauldron started to boil.
Everywhere spread a terrible crazy chaos in our ancient witch house,
over Nermin's legs spilled down the invisible oil.
From our silly heads another interesting idea out has gone
to see what our lovable guys without us were doing all alone.
After all we were afraid that this one wasn't our best,
we both sat on the old vacuum cleaner but this one had no attest.
Covered with oil for invisibility when our journey kicked a start,
our flying machine caught dust out from each damn hole,
before landing we were covered, visible were all parts
two ladies,dirty, our skins as black in color as coal.
We were mumbling certain words, all time alliterations,
but nothing happened, we dropped in our guys backyard.
They were there waiting for us with a johyva chocolates
to comfort us with adorable smiles and a little bit of regard.
Ashamed we felt, but in our secret pocket was some magical dust
a little bit of which we had to put in their beer glass
they drank it happily with smiling faces and a lot of trust.
As our secret magic works are only ours, not for a mass.
Author notes
Written with different rhyming pattern like all withces are used to do for Halloween.
Written October 3rd, 2006
In a list
What did you think
Comments
1 - 19 of 19
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Great job keep up the good work and good luck.
Amber aka midnight eyes
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Well done. Well done. A little humor goes a long, long way with some magic dust and a little trust, you nevr know what may come your way. Bewitching relationships, indeed. I love this halloween tale. Well written. Keep the ink flowing and good luck.
~Donna~
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Cool write, you told the tale well, good luck!
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Thank you dear RealEyezRealize. I am glad that my verses was interesting to you. Actualy I do not like too dark writting and it was good to include some fun in this one. I am looking forward to read more of your poetry too.
~Sonja~ -
That was awesome I love the whyming you did that perfectly and told the story very well and the backround is pretty awesome too if I say so myself, I do however wish there were more of an ending not that thats a bad thing the poem draws you in wanted more and im not saying at the ending was bad i personally just wanted to read more lol i want to know what happened with the guys honestly and i love how you sat on the vacumm cleaner this is a very cute poem and I enjoyed it very much, so thank you for sharing it and i hope you enyjoy mine as well...I didnt even know thiscritique for a critque even existed glad I found it and glad yours was the first one!!....WRITE ON ROCK ON READ ON!!!!!!
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Thank you! I am glad you like it.
~Sonja~ -
Awesome write!
Thank you so very much for sharing this piece; it's an awesome entry! All the best to you, my friend! -
good
Very mystical. That's pretty cool. -
Thank you kyl1186. f
~Sonja~ -
a lovely poem Good Luck
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dust is trust>??????
Sonja,
If I were to have a book of magical spells
I would use it to wish you and yours of well
Story was amusing and certainly no hard sell
Enjoyed it, even read it twice.
JD -
This sounds like a jaunt to Diagon Alley during the busy season dear Mother of my Beloved. Very discriptive.
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Thanks Kevin, Nermin and I was giggling and loughing all evening while we had to unite our ideas to make a poem. We just want to make it easy to read and a little bit different - to be funny poetry with happy end.
~Sonja~ -
A CUTE AND WONDERFUL STORY
What a cute little story! Oh those bumbling witches! But in the end all turns out well.
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My dear thank you very very much. you made my day and i am sure Sonja's too. we were laughing so much about it, it sounded crazy but we thought yeah why not, but nothing evil. thank you so much dear.
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This is very different from what I normally read. I liked it very much and I found myself smiling ear to ear. Witches brewing potions and things.. It really is well constructed and has a very unique and special feel to it. I have read this poem twice already and each time I find something else special within each line so I think I will be reading it a few more times. Great writting and thank you so much for sharing this with me
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Thank you much for your wonderful opinion. in fact yes i was thinking of a short story as i really think it would be cute.
thank you dear for your kind words.
hugs -
Thank you Frozentearz. Well maybe like some small Halloween book as a gift. I am glad that you like it. Now only a little thing - who will prepare the best drawings? I am glad that you found this little piece of poetic expression interesting.
~Sonja~ -
Hello,
Im not much on critical reviews, meaning im just not one to judge but.. As I read this a few thoughts came to mind..
I thought this would make a great little short story and could imagine a small book with pictures to go along to bring to life this witching quest.
I enjoyed this and I thank you for sharing
Warm thoughts
Frozentearz
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